# Battleship: The Movie **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 3, 2011, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294 "2011-08-03T06:37:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/21 "2011-08-03T13:19:10Z")
> [@Erdosain](#): > > Two men are drugged only to awake in a dank basement with a patient on the operating table. Can they remove his funny bone without touching the sides and receiving a deadly electric shock? “Remove the organs.” “Which organs, sir?” “All of them.” ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/22 "2011-08-03T13:19:18Z")
> [@DrFidelius](#): > > .. or the steampunk gadget extravaganza **Mousetrap**! If you watch the hilarious chain of events that lead to various sadistically gruesome deaths, the “Final Destination” series is kind of like a really grim version of Mousetrap. Battleship looks awful. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/23 "2011-08-03T13:23:37Z")
> [@Alka\_Seltzer](#): > > I know Hollywood worships brand recognition, but that really is beyond parody. What’s next, a medical drama based on Operation? African river adventure, Hungry Hungry Hippos? > > Not even released yet, and already we have a new contender for dumbest action movie line of all time. Rocky :Sock 'Em Robots > [@tdn](#): > > “Including the Pop-o-Matic?” > “No, we don’t want to start any Trouble.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![tanstaafl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ba8739/32.png) [@tanstaafl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tanstaafl)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/24 "2011-08-03T13:33:33Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > Rocky :Sock 'Em Robots > > 😃 You realize they _are_ making a movie based on Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots, don’t you? > **[Best Online Casino Australia – Top AU Real Money Casinos 2025](https://www.worstpreviews.com/?id=18116)** > > Find the best online casino in Australia with real money games, big bonuses, and fast payouts. Play safely at trusted Aussie casinos with secure payments. ---
**Author:** ![Alka\_Seltzer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c89c15/32.png) [@Alka\_Seltzer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alka_Seltzer)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/25 "2011-08-03T13:33:54Z")
> [@lieu](#): > > “Remove the organs.” > “Which organs, sir?” > “All of them.” Doubly appropriate, as that is the objective of the game. I always thought it should have been called “Vivisection”. ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/26 "2011-08-03T13:40:22Z")
Obligatory link to Youtube [Minesweeper the movie](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KjXlNxg8Vk&feature=related) ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/27 "2011-08-03T13:45:44Z")
> [@tanstaafl](#): > > You realize they _are_ making a movie based on Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots, don’t you? > > [Best Online Casino Australia – Top AU Real Money Casinos 2025](http://www.worstpreviews.com/headline.php?id=18116) :smack::smack::smack: Next logical step. SyFy Original Movie: Go Fish ---
**Author:** ![gonzoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a6a055/32.png) [@gonzoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzoron)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/28 "2011-08-03T14:04:56Z")
> [@alka seltzer](#): > > i know hollywood worships brand recognition, but that really is beyond parody. What’s next, a medical drama based on operation? African river adventure, hungry hungry hippos? stop giving them ideas!!! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/29 "2011-08-03T14:47:38Z")
> [@tanstaafl](#): > > You realize they _are_ making a movie based on Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots, don’t you? > > [Best Online Casino Australia – Top AU Real Money Casinos 2025](http://www.worstpreviews.com/headline.php?id=18116) There’s another movie about fighting robots that feels like a rock 'em, sock 'em robots, but this time with a heartwarming story about a Dad and his son. Actually, I’m sure “treacly” is a more accurate phrase, but I’m feeling generous today. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/30 "2011-08-03T15:05:41Z")
They should just combine all of these ideas into one movie, and call it Toy Movie or something like that. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/31 "2011-08-03T16:02:56Z")
> [@Sealemon2.0](#): > > The alien ship shoots pegs like from the board game. Damn you…I was seriously waiting for the giant red peg to fall from the sky as the punchline to this obvious joke trailer. All I could think at the end was “Holy crap, they’re serious”. ---
**Author:** ![GreedySmurf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a698b9/32.png) [@GreedySmurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreedySmurf)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2011, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/32 "2011-08-03T23:46:17Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > There’s another movie about fighting robots that feels like a rock 'em, sock 'em robots, but this time with a heartwarming story about a Dad and his son. > > Actually, I’m sure “treacly” is a more accurate phrase, but I’m feeling generous today. _Real Steel_ I think, with Hugh Jackman. The treacly heartwarming bit looks very blah, but the underlying premise of robot boxers actually sounds pretty cool. Of course no guarantee they’ll do it any justice. And from the trailer it appears to be a underdog comes good story (for the protagonist robot). As far as Battleship goes, I suspect I may be dragged along to it, because if I’m right in my fleeting glimpse in the trailer, it appears that Alexander Skaarsgard has a part in the movie, and my wife has the serious hots for him. (He plays Eric Northman on True Blood) ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/33 "2011-08-04T02:39:03Z")
I won’t count this movie out until I see a bit more, stupid though it looks at this time. I suspect similar things were said about a movie based on a theme park ride. Doesn’t mean this’ll be another _Pirates_ surprise, but it’s not impossible that they could make a fun movie out of this. ---
**Author:** ![Estilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/848f3c/32.png) [@Estilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Estilicon)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/34 "2011-08-04T02:52:41Z")
I am waiting for Master and Commander 2. In the meantime I’ll watch this one… twice. What are you going to do? Sue me? ---
**Author:** ![Foggy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foggy/32/1082_2.png) [@Foggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Foggy)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/35 "2011-08-04T03:44:13Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > “Fire the weapons.” > “Which weapons, sir?” > “All of them.” > > Based on that exchange alone, I’m assuming that the screen writer has not only never served in the Navy, he’s never seen a body of water larger than his bathtub. So I’m ignorant, what is wrong with this dialog? ---
**Author:** ![Algher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Algher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algher)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/36 "2011-08-04T03:53:13Z")
> [@Foggy](#): > > So I’m ignorant, what is wrong with this dialog? I could use some help too. I had my Marine ass parked on the New Jersey for a bit, and we certainly did a full broadside more than once (while the Marines were having fun inside our assigned 5 inch gun). All of them to me simply means a nice broadside. Now, if you mean that they are not including the Tomahawk missiles that the installed on the Iowa class ships later, I guess you have a point. ---
**Author:** ![Equipoise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/equipoise/32/151_2.png) [@Equipoise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Equipoise)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/37 "2011-08-04T03:55:25Z")
Huh, I guess I’m the only one who’ll be seeing this strictly based on the director: [Peter Berg](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000916/). I haven’t seen everything he’s done, but I’ve liked everything I’ve seen (yes, I liked Very Bad Things and Hancock, shut up). He gets a lifetime pass for **Friday Night Lights** alone. I’m an optimistic movie-goer. I WANT everything to be good, so I very rarely shit on a movie in advance. Some of the times I have, I’ve turned out to be wildly wrong (see: Let Me In), so I look for things to be optimistic about, such as the fact that this movie is directed by Peter Berg. You just never know, ok, you just never know. Rise of the Planet of the Apes would seem to be a prime target for advanced hatred and snark that it will suck, and yet _now_ the buzz (among some critics at least) is that it’s not only the best Apes movie ever, in a different category altogether, it’s one of the best films of 2011. Seriously. I know, right? ---
**Author:** ![Max\_the\_Immortal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Max\_the\_Immortal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_the_Immortal)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/38 "2011-08-04T04:01:19Z")
I kind of want to go see a movie where this trailer will be shown beforehand. Then right afterward, when the theatre is dark and quiet, I shout, _“Are you shitting me?”_. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/39 "2011-08-04T04:24:57Z")
I imagine that it’s impossible to point all of the weapons on a ship in the same direction, and even of those that can point in the same direction, there might be problems with manpower and/or recoil if you tried to fire them all at once. ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/40 "2011-08-04T04:32:17Z")
> [@Max\_the\_Immortal](#): > > I kind of want to go see a movie where this trailer will be shown beforehand. Then right afterward, when the theatre is dark and quiet, I shout, _“Are you shitting me?”_. I saw a trailer for _Battleship_ when I went to see _Cowboys & Aliens_, and when the title of the movie came up, I swear there was a collective groan from the audience. From me too. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294.md?page=3)