# Battleship: The Movie **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 3, 2011, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294 "2011-08-03T06:37:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![HenryGale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b782af/32.png) [@HenryGale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HenryGale)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/101 "2011-08-08T21:47:36Z")
I love you guys. Thank you for showing me I’m not just becoming a hopeless curmudgeon. When I first saw this trailer before… Captain America?.. I really felt like it was a Herculean effort not to stand up, chuck my soda at the screen, and scream “what the fuck is wrong with you people?!?” I’m glad it’s not just me. What just occurred to me now is this isn’t going to be just a giant steaming dump in the cinema, it’s going to be a giant steaming dump on Battleship the board game. You know there’s going to be a shiny new Liam Neeson Vs the Aliens version of the game; a game, by the way, that not a soul on this planet actually thinks needs a “re-imagining.” BLLEEAAGH. ---
**Author:** ![Declan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@Declan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Declan)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/102 "2011-08-09T06:24:48Z")
So I dont suppose that some chick jumps out of a giant birthday cake at some point. Declan ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/103 "2011-08-09T19:13:39Z")
> [@Alka\_Seltzer](#): > > I know Hollywood worships brand recognition, but that really is beyond parody. What’s next, a medical drama based on Operation? African river adventure, Hungry Hungry Hippos? > > Not even released yet, and already we have a new contender for dumbest action movie line of all time. Reminds me of _Stripes_. Fire the weapon, soldier! Coordinates, sir? Never mind that, just fire the weapon! ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/104 "2011-08-09T19:21:08Z")
> [@Alka\_Seltzer](#): > > I know Hollywood worships brand recognition, but that really is beyond parody. What’s next, a medical drama based on Operation? African river adventure, Hungry Hungry Hippos? Guy: Be careful. That hippo looks hungry. Very hungry. You might even say hungry, hungry. Other Guy: They’re coming this way. Start throwing the emu eggs into the water! Quick!! -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/105 "2011-08-09T19:21:25Z")
> [@HenryGale](#): > > What just occurred to me now is this isn’t going to be just a giant steaming dump in the cinema, it’s going to be a giant steaming dump on Battleship the board game. You know there’s going to be a shiny new Liam Neeson Vs the Aliens version of the game; a game, by the way, that not a soul on this planet actually thinks needs a “re-imagining.” Battleship the board game has been reimagined so many times over the last 25 years that one more isn’t going to matter. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/106 "2011-08-09T19:29:07Z")
Obligatory cracked link: [Battleship Novelization Based on the Trailer](http://www.cracked.com/blog/novelization-trailer-movie-battleship/) -Joe ---
**Author:** ![kath94](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/67e7ee/32.png) [@kath94](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kath94)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/107 "2011-08-09T22:27:57Z")
> [@Hal\_Briston](#): > > Don’t miss [the novelization](http://www.cracked.com/blog/novelization-trailer-movie-battleship/)… Pssst! **Merijeek**! Check out \*\*Hal’\*\*s post #100. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/108 "2011-08-09T23:04:02Z")
> [@kath94](#): > > Pssst! **Merijeek**! Check out \*\*Hal’\*\*s post #100. Look, if I could come up with some clever board game related comment here I would. But I can’t think of one, so I’ll have to say “pretty sneaky sis” and get on with my day. -Joe ---
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2011, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/109 "2011-08-10T00:15:36Z")
> [@DrFidelius](#): > > and zepplins vs pteradactyls. [Samuel L. Jackson Voice] And for the love of God, will someone _please_ get me some ninjas?! And some frickin’ _sharks?!_ With frickin’ _laser_ beams attached to their frickin’ _heads_?! [/Samuel L. Jackson Voice] ---
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2011, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/110 "2011-08-10T00:16:55Z")
> [@Declan](#): > > So I dont suppose that some chick jumps out of a giant birthday cake at some point. > > Declan Is she nekkid? ---
**Author:** ![mlees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@mlees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlees)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2011, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/111 "2011-08-10T15:41:57Z")
> [@ExTank](#): > > Is she nekkid? Isn’t that the point? You ever hear of a Nun jumping out of a cake? Didn’t think so… ( 😉 ) ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2011, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/112 "2011-08-10T16:50:17Z")
> [@Sealemon2.0](#): > > No, seriously. > > [http://www.battleshipmovie.com](http://www.battleshipmovie.com) > > Liam Neeson, apparently needing beer money, is here to collect a check. The alien ship shoots pegs like from the board game. I originally read this as Leslie Nielsen doing this movie, which could have worked and probably would have made more sense. Even if he’s dead. ---
**Author:** ![mlees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@mlees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlees)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/113 "2011-12-12T19:34:21Z")
Posting link to new trailer. New trailer is a little more interesting than the one linked earlier. > **[Battleship (2012) ⭐ 5.8 | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1440129/#lb-vi1683070489)** > > 2h 11m | PG-13 ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/114 "2011-12-12T21:58:59Z")
> [@Alka\_Seltzer](#): > > … > I wondered how long it would be before someone invoked Pirates of the Caribbean. I don’t know what the ride was like before the film was released, but I assume the basic elements were in place. Pirates + cursed treasure makes a good basis for a fun action movie. In contrast, the game of battleships brings nothing to the table. There are simply no elements that are suitable for adaption, other than the most basic idea of two fleets in conflict… I remember Pirates of the Caribbean at WDW years before the movies. Basically, it was about bloodthirsty pirates and their favorite things - guns, gold, and girls. I don’t remember there being any real fantasy elements though. ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/115 "2011-12-12T22:00:57Z")
> [@wheresgeorge04](#): > > Now THAT’S an invasion I can support! > … That’s what she said! ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/116 "2011-12-12T22:03:47Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > “Including the Pop-o-Matic?” > “No, we don’t want to start any Trouble.” “Sorry!” ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2012, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/117 "2012-04-21T18:21:54Z")
I saw it today. It was ok. A cross between Independence Day and War of the Worlds. There is a scene where one character is calling out grid coordinates just like in the board game, except he uses the NATO phonetic alphabet (Charlie-6! … Miss!). This was probably required by Hasbro. Otherwise the movie has no tie-ins with the game. Oh, and nobody says “you sunk my battleship!” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2012, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/118 "2012-04-21T19:00:42Z")
Isn’t it unusual for an American-made movie to be released in the foreign market before it hits American theatres? ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2012, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/119 "2012-04-21T19:03:27Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Isn’t it unusual for an American-made movie to be released in the foreign market before it hits American theatres? Avengers has already opened in the UK too. Must be something about this year’s movies. ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2012, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294/120 "2012-04-21T20:54:29Z")
> [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](#): > > Oh, and nobody says “you sunk my battleship!” Fail. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/battleship-the-movie/591294.md?page=7)