# Because you have the technology does NOT make it ok to use it, asshole. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 13, 2010, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036 "2010-06-13T19:03:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/41 "2010-06-13T21:55:21Z")
> [@Stoid](#): > > I posted those things in reference to the argument that that the fact that a thing is possible to do, we should just accept that people are going to do it. If that argument had validity, it would have to extend to everything, including the most extreme things. Well, I don’t think that was the argument that \*\*elucidator \*\*was making. He was indicating that the cure would be worse than the disease. Doesn’t mean you have to “accept” it, just understand that there isn’t anything we can, or should, do about it. > [@](#): > > I’m suggesting B, and it’s obvious I’m getting argument. You aren’t getting “much argument”. Your getting a little bit of argument, and some “meh”. And I think you’re reading more argument into the posts than are actually there. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/42 "2010-06-13T22:05:51Z")
You know, people still point and laugh at fatties even if they don’t take pictures of them. The reason this woman is being laughed at isn’t because someone photographed her, but because she looks like that in the first place. Suspending the 1st Amendment to prohibit people from taking pictures in public will not make unattractive people more attractive or stop people from laughing ath them. If this person does not want to be harmed, she can start by picking up the salad fork. Her appearance is totally voluntary. ---
**Author:** ![amanset](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8dc957/32.png) [@amanset](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amanset)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/43 "2010-06-13T22:06:30Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Laughter is about spreading joy, not pain. Incorrect. Laughter is an involuntary response to something you find amusing. Nothing more. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/44 "2010-06-13T22:08:25Z")
> [@Stoid](#): > > I posted those things in reference to the argument that that the fact that a thing is possible to do, we should just accept that people are going to do it. If that argument had validity, it would have to extend to everything, including the most extreme things. Yes, that’s what free speech allows. It allows the most extreme speech. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/45 "2010-06-13T22:10:07Z")
There has always been ways in which society lets its members know that certain behaviors are not acceptable. Whether it’s getting stoned by the community (not in the good way), having your hand cut off, going to jail, or being made fun of, there are ways that we teach people “it’s not okay to do that”. It’s only natural that this perfectly natural selection process would extend to the internet. It’s just another method of society policing itself. If you don’t want to be exposed as a dummy to the world, then don’t act like a dummy. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/46 "2010-06-13T22:12:41Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > It really isn’t reasonable to laugh at someone if that laughter hurts them. Laughter is about spreading joy, not pain. “If I fall in a manhole and die, that’s tragedy. If you fall in a manhole and die, that’s comedy.” -Mel Brooks ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/47 "2010-06-13T22:12:47Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > Stoid, how many more threads like this will it take for you to figure out that you are not the high empress of what is and is not OK? Comments like this are NOT OK! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/48 "2010-06-13T22:22:19Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > Yes, that’s what free speech allows. It allows the most extreme speech. There’s really no arguing with this. Can we say then: “Because you have the technology _and the legal right_ does NOT make it ok to use it, asshole?” I mean, cruelty to animal prevention statues do not protect fish, but if I started the thread **Woo-hoo, I’m torturing fish like a motherfucker,"** what should I expect? ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/49 "2010-06-13T22:30:12Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > You know, people still point and laugh at fatties even if they don’t take pictures of them. Well yeah, and that’s kind of asshole behavior too. If, say, one of your daughters is fat and/or unattractive and somebody makes fun of her, will you just tell her that her appearance is totally voluntary and if she doesn’t want to be harmed it’s on her to change how she looks? Or would it occur to you to mention to her that the person who was making fun of her wasn’t being very nice? ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/50 "2010-06-13T22:30:14Z")
> [@Slithy\_Tove](#): > > I mean, cruelty to animal prevention statues do not protect fish, but if I started the thread **Woo-hoo, I’m torturing fish like a motherfucker,"** what should I expect? Requests for pics. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/51 "2010-06-13T22:38:56Z")
> [@Slithy\_Tove](#): > > I mean, cruelty to animal prevention statues do not protect fish, but if I started the thread **Woo-hoo, I’m torturing fish like a motherfucker,"** what should I expect? Wet hands. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/52 "2010-06-13T22:44:26Z")
Just repeating the words of other posters in this thread: Why is it OK to laugh at the stupidity of others but not at the physical appearance of others, especially when, unlike your intelligence, you actually have control over how much you weigh? ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/53 "2010-06-13T22:45:04Z")
> [@Stoid](#): > > I’m suggesting B, and it’s obvious I’m getting argument. When you compare posting such a picture to things that are possible but illegal (theft, murder, rape) you imply that these things should also be illegal. Better comparisons would be: I can relate stories of my previous partner’s sexual inadequacies to his friends, but I shouldn’t. I can fart loudly in a fine dining establishment, but I shouldn’t. I can put my cat down when I decide I am bored with having a pet, but I shouldn’t. These are all things that are perfectly legal, but would be signs of being a serious asshole. I think you will clear up a lot of confusion and help prevent a trainwreck here if you answer this question: Do you think it should be _illegal_ to publish pictures like that on the internet? ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/54 "2010-06-13T22:48:32Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > Well, I don’t think that was the argument that \*\*elucidator \*\*was making. He was indicating that the cure would be worse than the disease. Doesn’t mean you have to “accept” it, just understand that there isn’t anything we can, or should, do about it. > . I think there’s a lot of mixing going on there. First, what is the “cure” you or 'luc are talking about? Until we know, how can we know if it would be worse than the disease? Second, isn’t “understanding” that there isnt’ anything that can or should be done about it accepting it? I can’t think of anything more involved in acceptance than that. Here’s the cure that is in no way worse than the disease, a cure that should and can be done: Reject it. Denounce it. Point and laugh and deride and dismiss it. Call it out for what it is. Get others of like mind to do the same. Chimera’s has the right idea, he’s just lining up behind the wrong issue: do what you can to show people how ugly it is and maybe people will be sufficiently ashamed of themselves to stop doing it. People are, by and large, sheep. Research has proved it. Most people will wait to see what other people do before they decide how to act themselves. And even if they know in their hearts that other people are acting badly, too often they will simply say nothing rather than speak out against the crowd. > [@](#): > > Peggy liked Stewart. They went to high school together. Their fathers were friends, both farmers in California’s Central Valley, and Peggy would always say “hi” when she passed Stewart in the hall. > > Yet every day when Stewart boarded their school bus, a couple of boys would tease him mercilessly. And every day, Peggy would just sit in her seat, silent. > “I was dying inside for him,” she said. “There were enough of us on the bus who were feeling awful—we could have done something. But none of us said anything.” > Peggy still can’t explain why she didn’t stick up for Stewart. She had known his tormenters since they were all little kids, and she didn’t find them threatening. **She thinks if she had spoken up on his behalf, other kids might have chimed in to make the teasing stop.** > > But perhaps most surprising—and distressing—to Peggy is that she considers herself an assertive and moral person, yet those convictions aren’t backed up by her conduct on the bus. > “I think I would say something now, but I don’t know for sure,” she said. “Maybe if I saw someone being beaten up and killed, I’d just stand there. That still worries me.” > > Many of us share Peggy’s concern. We’ve all found ourselves in similar situations: the times we’ve seen someone harassed on the street and didn’t intervene; when we’ve driven past a car stranded by the side of the road, assuming another driver would pull over to help; even when we’ve noticed litter on the sidewalk and left it for someone else to pick up. We witness a problem, consider some kind of positive action, then respond by doing… nothing. Something holds us back. We remain bystanders. > > Why don’t we help in these situations? Why do we sometimes put our moral instincts in shackles? These are questions that haunt all of us, and they apply well beyond the fleeting scenarios described above. Every day we serve as bystanders to the world around us—not just to people in need on the street but to larger social, political, and environmental problems that concern us, but which we feel powerless to address on our own. Indeed, the bystander phenomenon pervades the history of the past century. It’s the same functional process, from joining in or just saying nothing when someone posts a picture for others to laugh at, all the way up the line. It’s the “[bystander effect](http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/we_are_all_bystanders)”, and I call bullshit on it. We can do better. ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/55 "2010-06-13T22:51:04Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > “If I fall in a manhole and die, that’s tragedy. If you fall in a manhole and die, that’s comedy.” > -Mel Brooks Well, yeah. That’s true. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/56 "2010-06-13T23:04:03Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > Yes, that’s what free speech allows. It allows the most extreme speech. The right to speak freely means the right to speak (or otherwise express) one’s thoughts and ideas without interference from the government. Period. Using the term “free speech” in any other context is meaningless. (_Even within_ that context, there are still limits on speech: slander, libel, right to publicity, right to privacy, obscenity and good ol’ fire in a crowded theater. What is that legally defined as? Inciting panic?) ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/57 "2010-06-13T23:32:39Z")
> [@Stoid](#): > > Chimera’s has the right idea, he’s just lining up behind the wrong issue: do what you can to show people how ugly it is and maybe people will be sufficiently ashamed of themselves to stop doing it. Wait a minute. THIS poster; I’m for truth, no matter who tells it. I’m for justice, no matter who it’s for or against. -Malcolm X Is telling me that I’m in the wrong her because I’m saying that it isn’t ALL BAD that some people get pointed and laughed at in public for things that are clearly in their control (at least to some degree) they but are apparently oblivious about? People learn by making mistakes. They learn most by having OTHER PEOPLE point out their errors. If they look silly in public and do not realize it, having people laugh at them is a rather direct way of telling themu that there is something wrong and maybe they should notice it. Posting pictures on the Internet is merely our modern method of sharing information with our social groups, which are much wider spread than in previous eras. There is nothing inherently wrong with this. Sure, some people are asses. Hell, most people are, and EVERYONE is at some point or another. We can’t legislate this and social pressure is unlikely to make any dent in it given the psychological pressure (leftover herd mentality animal behavior) not to show any kind of weakness. Being a jerk gets you ahead in life and let’s face it, doesn’t appear to have all that many downsides, even if that isn’t how you or I may choose to live our lives. So my take on this is that you can laugh at the people in the pictures with impunity, because they are funny looking, or you can choose to sympathize or empathize with them. You can also do both. Neither preclude having the thought that the person posting the pictures is a major jerk. ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/58 "2010-06-13T23:56:32Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > People learn by making mistakes. They learn most by having OTHER PEOPLE point out their errors. If they look silly in public and do not realize it, having people laugh at them is a rather direct way of telling themu that there is something wrong and maybe they should notice it. Posting pictures on the Internet is merely our modern method of sharing information with our social groups, which are much wider spread than in previous eras. There is nothing inherently wrong with this. Do we really want “looking stupid in public” to be an error? Looking offensive (like going out in blackface with a noose around your neck), sure. Looking inappropriate in some contexts–like at someone else’s wedding or funeral, or something, sure. But is looking stupid in a waiting room really an error that needs to be corrected with public humiliation? Assuming that the “public humiliation” gun can only be used to control a finite number of behaviors, this honestly seems like a stupid one to choose: it’s petty and mean-spirited. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2010, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/59 "2010-06-13T23:59:46Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > Well yeah, and that’s kind of asshole behavior too. > > If, say, one of your daughters is fat and/or unattractive and somebody makes fun of her, will you just tell her that her appearance is totally voluntary and if she doesn’t want to be harmed it’s on her to change how she looks? > > Or would it occur to you to mention to her that the person who was making fun of her wasn’t being very nice? Both things can be true. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036/60 "2010-06-14T00:01:28Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > They learn most by having OTHER PEOPLE point out their errors. If they look silly in public and do not realize it, having people laugh at them is a rather direct way of telling themu that there is something wrong and maybe they should notice it. Posting pictures on the Internet is merely our modern method of sharing information with our social groups, which are much wider spread than in previous eras. There is nothing inherently wrong with this. Sure there is. Namely, it’s mean and rude behavior. I don’t advocate trying to make it illegal or anything, but we don’t have to take refuge in mealy-mouthed hypocrisy about how mean and rude behavior is somehow actually GOOD for its victims because it makes them more self-aware or some such bullshit. We can simply call it out as mean and rude, and consider people assholes for indulging in it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/because-you-have-the-technology-does-not-make-it-ok-to-use-it-asshole/543036.md?page=4)