# Becoming a father **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 7, 2013, 10:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278 "2013-03-07T10:02:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2013, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/221 "2013-03-10T06:29:16Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > BTW I said to her that I’m not sure she’d want to talk about it since earlier she was trying to end my negative situations. Sure. I understand this. ---
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2013, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/222 "2013-03-10T06:37:56Z")
BTW I meant “negative conversations” not “negative situations”. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2013, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/223 "2013-03-10T06:53:04Z")
That’s a good idea. No one’s doing this out of spite, dude. It’s just that having a kid is such a huge deal, it’s a decision that should never be made lightly. But you really, REALLY do need to get a plunger. Trust me, it’s much better than pulling turds out with your hands. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2013, 7:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/224 "2013-03-10T07:54:42Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > BTW I meant “negative conversations” not “negative situations”. Does it really matter? ---
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/225 "2013-03-11T06:50:46Z")
I said to my wife that I’d like to get a vasectomy one day since I like unprotected sex a lot better (and she gets anxiety worse if she has birth control). She said I could in 4 years… so I’ve got something to look forward to. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/226 "2013-03-11T18:11:47Z")
BTW at least you’ll alway have turds to rescue. ---
**Author:** ![Meatros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Meatros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meatros)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/227 "2013-03-11T18:25:22Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > I can’t be bothered buying one. And I try to minimize my possessions. And you haven’t answered about how a plunger helps pick up a turd out of a toilet… I think you’d need tongs or something for that. Why is your go-to to try to rescue the turd? It’s not a brick, force that sucker down there with the plunger. The situation might never arise again, but seriously, can you ever be certain? A 5 dollar plunger seems a necessity to me, not a luxury item, and I’ve never wrestled a turd-gator out of the toilet. Sorry if this is tangential, it’s just so alien to how I think about these sorts of things. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/228 "2013-03-11T19:20:04Z")
OP, I seem to recall that in previous threads, you mentioned that your wife is schizophrenic and you are bipolar. Whether that is the case or you both have some different mental illnesses, I’d suggest that you see a geneticist before conceiving, so that you may fully understand the risks of having a child with mental illness. Also speaking to your respective doctors and/or therapists frankly about having a child and what that may mean to each of you and your relationship to each other, as well as to a child. If you’re going to go ahead with having a child, at least be informed about it. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/229 "2013-03-11T20:08:49Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > BTW at least you’ll alway have turds to rescue. Be nice. They’d still be ‘kids’ to him and his wife. ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/230 "2013-03-11T21:16:01Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > OP, I seem to recall that in previous threads, you mentioned that your wife is schizophrenic and you are bipolar. Whether that is the case or you both have some different mental illnesses, I’d suggest that you see a geneticist before conceiving, so that you may fully understand the risks of having a child with mental illness. Hasn’t he already addressed that? Both are generally adult-onset, so not his problem! ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/231 "2013-03-11T21:27:20Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > OP, I seem to recall that in previous threads, you mentioned that your wife is schizophrenic and you are bipolar. Whether that is the case or you both have some different mental illnesses, I’d suggest that you see a geneticist before conceiving, so that you may fully understand the risks of having a child with mental illness. Also speaking to your respective doctors and/or therapists frankly about having a child and what that may mean to each of you and your relationship to each other, as well as to a child. If you’re going to go ahead with having a child, at least be informed about it. Not to mention, the very real possibility of post-partum depression or psychosis exacerbating her current mental health issues. ---
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/232 "2013-03-11T22:19:21Z")
> [@Meatros](#): > > Why is your go-to to try to rescue the turd? It’s not a brick, force that sucker down there with the plunger. It was about half the size of a brick… it was incredible thick… I think it originally had a normal thickness then it compacted when it was flushed. i.e. I doubt it could be forced down. ---
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/233 "2013-03-11T22:22:15Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Not to mention, the very real possibility of post-partum depression or psychosis exacerbating her current mental health issues. This is partly why my wife agrees that it isn’t such a good idea - at least for the time being. ---
**Author:** ![Meatros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Meatros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meatros)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/234 "2013-03-11T22:27:02Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > It was about half the size of a brick… it was incredible thick… I think it originally had a normal thickness then it compacted when it was flushed. i.e. I doubt it could be forced down. No snark, but have you used a plunger before? ---
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2013, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278/235 "2013-03-11T22:34:56Z")
No… BTW the toilet actually flushed still so actually the toilet wasn’t blocked… I just couldn’t flush the turd down… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-father/652278.md?page=11)