# Becoming a Reform Jew? Could I really? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [September 13, 2006, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-reform-jew-could-i-really/372604 "2006-09-13T22:13:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2006, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-reform-jew-could-i-really/372604/21 "2006-09-14T18:05:04Z")
[QUOTE=EJsGirl] It was my understanding that one couldn’t convert to Reform Judaism. Or is it just that Orthodox rabbis do not recognize such a conversion? [/QUOTE] It is the latter. Reform conversions that don’t include circumcision or symbolic circumcision for men and that don’t include immersing in a mikveh (ritual bath) for either gender are not considered valid by Conservative standards. I don’t have personal experience with converting to Reform Judaism, but I got the impression that Reform conversions that don’t include those things are becoming rarer these days. > [@](#): > > I always assumed that if you were going to convert, you went all the way I considered converting Orthodox, as a lot of people who convert to Judaism do. But I decided I didn’t agree with the Orthodox on a number of issues, so it would be dishonest for me to convert Orthodox. > [@elmwood](#): > > Jewish services tend to be less formal than Christian services. It’s not that people get dressed down, but rather that there’s a lot more chatting among the congregants before the service, and it’s okay to be late. Beleive it or not, Conservative and Orthodox Jews tend to be far more laxidasical about arriving to service on time than Reform Jews. Definitely. If you arrive a little early for a Jewish service, you’re going to be one of the only ones there. Standards of dress vary with the community- I wasn’t going to go to synagogue in Honolulu because the only clean clothes I had were aloha shirts, but I was informed that aloha shirts were perfectly acceptable attire in that congregation. Sure enough, I wasn’t the only one wearing one. I’m not sure what Reform has to say about head coverings for men these days- I’m pretty sure you can wear a yarmulke to a Reform temple if you want to, but I’m not sure they’d ask you to wear one if you weren’t (many Conservative synagogues would). > [@](#): > > RJ tends not do the “Look at us! We welcome gays! Look ar our many rainbow flags! Gay gay gay gay gay!” thing like the Unitarian Universalists There is a well-known “gay synagogue” in San Francisco, though, that is more like that. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2006, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-reform-jew-could-i-really/372604/22 "2006-09-14T20:19:41Z")
[QUOTE=Anne Neville] I’m not sure what Reform has to say about head coverings for men these days- I’m pretty sure you can wear a yarmulke to a Reform temple if you want to, but I’m not sure they’d ask you to wear one if you weren’t (many Conservative synagogues would). [/QUOTE] At my synagogue (the aforementioned Large Egalitarian Liberal Congregation), about 75% of the men at a service will be wearing kippot. There are boxes of house kippot at the entrances to the chapel and sanctuary, each with a large sign that reads “OPTIONAL”. Nobody gives you the stinkeye if your head is uncovered, though. At the rival Large Upper Middle Class Congregation, only about 25% of the men will wear kippot during a service. Almost all the male heads are covered at The Old People’s Congregation Where They Use A Lot Of Hebrew. The Blue Collar Congregation is about 50/50, and the crowd at the Really Liberal Congregation Where They Use Very Little Hebrew has very few yarmulke-covered heads. What seems unusual is that the GBLT havurah at my synagogue has biweekly services that go on much longer, with an even higher percentage of Hebrew, than the typical Friday night service. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2006, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-reform-jew-could-i-really/372604/23 "2006-09-14T20:32:18Z")
[QUOTE=elmwood] Reform congregations all have their own personalities. Near me, there’s the Upper Middle Class Congregation, the Blue Collar Congregation, the Egalitarian Liberal Congregation, the Old People’s Congregation Where They Use A Lot Of Hebrew, and the Really Liberal Congregation Where They Use Very Little Hebrew. 😃 [/QUOTE] That’s like the other joke, where the two Jews crash on a deserted island, and they build three synagogues…the one the first person goes to, the one the second person goes to, and the one neither of them would be caught dead in. ---
**Author:** ![FormerMarineGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/65b543/32.png) [@FormerMarineGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FormerMarineGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2006, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-reform-jew-could-i-really/372604/24 "2006-09-14T21:34:23Z")
I also got a 100% match for Reform Judaism and found the site most enjoyable. I am also a 93% match for Liberal Quakers, which would be much cooler to explain as my choice of religions. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2006, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-reform-jew-could-i-really/372604/25 "2006-09-14T22:03:44Z")
[QUOTE=Valteron] As many of you probably already know, your obed’nt srvt., Valteron, is a cranky [/QUOTE] Judaism has nothing against the cranky. > [@](#): > > misanthropic This is a problem. Love of other human beings holds a high place in Judaism. The Talmud has ‘be your brother’s keeper’ as one of its most basic tenets. > [@](#): > > pretendingly suicidal I’m sure you’re familiar with the Jewish position and arguments on suicide. > [@](#): > > middle-aged Not a problem. > [@](#): > > unobjective crackpot of an attention whore You’ll blend right in with the other meshungunehs > [@](#): > > who is 58, gay, and legally married to his partner of 30 years Many Reform congregations will accept gays. Some Conservative ones will as well. > [@](#): > > (we are Canadians) Feh. Shatner is Canadian and Jewish. Seriously, I see your attitude about the rest of humanity as the largest problem. Outside of Ecclesiastes, you won’t find humanity described in such low and pessimistic terms. ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2006, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-reform-jew-could-i-really/372604/26 "2006-09-15T01:22:12Z")
[QUOTE=Valteron] Number 1 of a list of 27 faiths is Reform Judaism, with which I have, apparently, 100% compatibility!!! Following that are Unitarian Universalist and Liberal Quakers both with 99% (perhaps my aversion to oatmeal accounts for the 1%). My childhood religion, Roman Catholicism, comes in 26 out of 27, just ahead of Jehovah’s Witnesses (no surprise there) with only 35%. I was obviously NOT meant to be a Catholic. [/QUOTE] Agnostic/secular humanist here, raised as a Reform Jew - I still identify as one culturally, but not theologically. Here were my results, which I found absolutely hilarious: 1. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (100%) 2. Liberal Quakers (95%) 3. Unitarian Universalism (93%) 4. Secular Humanism (89%) 5. Neo-Pagan (75%) 6. Bahá’í Faith (71%) 7. New Age (70%) 8. Theravada Buddhism (69%) 9. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (67%) 10. Taoism (63%) 11. Mahayana Buddhism (61%) 12. Nontheist (60%) 13. Orthodox Quaker (59%) 14. Reform Judaism (59%) 15. New Thought (56%) 16. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (55%) 17. Scientology (49%) 18. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (48%) 19. Jainism (43%) 20. Jehovah’s Witness (40%) 21. Sikhism (38%) 22. Islam (30%) 23. Orthodox Judaism (30%) 24. Hinduism (26%) 25. Seventh Day Adventist (25%) 26. Eastern Orthodox (18%) 27. Roman Catholic (18%) How can I be a Christian without, you know, the whole believing in God thing, let alone Christ? Isn’t that kind of fundamental to any flavor of Christianity? ---
**Author:** ![633squadron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/6/ee59a6/32.png) [@633squadron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/633squadron)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2006, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-reform-jew-could-i-really/372604/27 "2006-09-15T02:39:23Z")
[QUOTE=Captain Amazing] That’s like the other joke, where the two Jews crash on a deserted island, and they build three synagogues…the one the first person goes to, the one the second person goes to, and the one neither of them would be caught dead in. [/QUOTE] Which brings up another thing about MOTs, having to do with jokes. First: that isn’t the joke. The joke is **one** Jewish man is stranded on an island. He’s rescued after two years. He proudly shows the rescuers around the island. He’s built an entire village; a restaurant, a theater, a library, and _two_ synagogues. The rescuers ask him “Why did you build _two_ synagogues?” He replies, “This one here I go to, and that one I wouldn’t be caught dead in!” The second comes from the first: When an Englishman hears a joke, he laughs once, after he understands it. When a Frenchman hears a joke, he laughs twice; once when he hears it, and once when he tells it to someone else. When a Jew hears a joke, he interrupts the teller, says “No, that’s not the way to tell it!” and proceeds to tell the joke himself. ---
**Author:** ![Shecky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/85e7bf/32.png) [@Shecky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shecky)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2006, 11:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-reform-jew-could-i-really/372604/28 "2006-09-15T11:42:05Z")
Join us Reformed Jews! It’s like a cult, really. Chanting in strange languages. Learning your first hebrew phrase (Usually how to say “Shut Up!”, thanks Mrs. Edison). Realizing that the only big offense you could make was ham at Passover (I asked for it one year. What? I liked ham and I was 6). Also, it’s a low maintenance religion. It’s about realizing that no electricity on Saturdays is stupid, as lights seem to decrease the amount of accidents you have. And for all the Sephardim in Deal, NJ - those stupid little lines you all have around your house is CHEATING! You’re not supposed to do work. It doesn’t make it ok since you paid 3 mexicans to string some twine around your property. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-a-reform-jew-could-i-really/372604.md?page=1)