# Becoming one of the elite
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [June 17, 2003, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535 "2003-06-17T20:10:27Z")
**Posts on this page:** 19
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@WeRSauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WeRSauron)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/1 "2003-06-17T20:10:27Z")
I hear so much about conspiracies and groups that control the world. What I want to know is how does one join them? I want to contribute to the unholy alliances! I want to be one of the elite!
But I haven’t the slightest clue how to join these organizations, such as the Illuminati, Trilateral Commission, bands of ritual Satanists, power-hungry Freemasons (I know how to join the boring, ordinary, run-of-the-mill Freemasons), secret Vatican corps, etc.
Any ideas?
(I’ll give Austria or Iceland or the Koreas to whomever can get me into the higher circles, once I take over the world, of course.)
WRS
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### Author:  [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/2 "2003-06-17T20:23:40Z")
Well, the last thing you want to do is inquire about it on the internet, that’s for sure. Seems you’ve shot yourself in the foot, eh?
xlb phlutr coptra
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### Author:  [@WeRSauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WeRSauron)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/3 "2003-06-17T20:31:46Z")
Perhaps.
I’m sure the Unholy Alliances are looking for eager, young (I’m 23!) potential members to carry forth the Dark Work beyond the current generation. This is just a sign of my enthusiasm!!!
WRS
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### Author:  [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/4 "2003-06-17T20:39:10Z")
All I’m going to say further on the subject, WeRSauron, is that actions speak louder than words.
That is all.
ylmi remjark oowcig xi libvrap
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### Author:  [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/5 "2003-06-17T20:41:42Z")
You have to first know the secret passwords. See if you know the proper response to this: The Red Dog Howls at Midnight.
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### Author:  [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/6 "2003-06-17T20:44:09Z")
The mackerel lies sleeping in the bay?
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### Author:  [@WeRSauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WeRSauron)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/7 "2003-06-17T20:47:14Z")
Yes, of course, O Great One! I will not question Your most wise words!
Pray, enlighten a one in darkness - what mean the random letters underneath your post? Is it some Mystick Secret? Some password to the General Headquarters of the Worldwide Association for the Coordination of Unholy Alliances and Other Groups for a Successful Takeover of the World?
WRS
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### Author:  [@WeRSauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WeRSauron)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/8 "2003-06-17T20:48:57Z")
The Blue Cow sleeps violently.
Am I in?
WRS
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### Author:  [@Fuji\_Kitakyusho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuji_Kitakyusho)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/9 "2003-06-17T20:50:00Z")
You can’t just apply and JOIN the illuminati. You need to become important and/or influential enough that we seek YOU out. Your induction, if it happens at all, will come at a time and place of OUR choosing.
-FK
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### Author:  [@WeRSauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WeRSauron)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/10 "2003-06-17T20:53:08Z")
I am Sauron, Lord of the Rings, Master of Mordor and all the lands around it.
Is that enough?
WRS
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### Author:  [@Fuji\_Kitakyusho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuji_Kitakyusho)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/11 "2003-06-17T20:55:16Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Khadaji \*
> \*\*You have to first know the secret passwords. See if you know the proper response to this: The Red Dog Howls at Midnight. \*\*
Khadaji, you must have missed a memo… according to the current SOP’s, it is the WHITE dog that has the midnight spot. The red dog was moved up a slot to 11:15…
-FK
[www.illuminati.org](http://www.illuminati.org)
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### Author:  [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/12 "2003-06-17T20:59:44Z")
Oh, and I **do** hope you are male, **Sauron**. Those clubs are distressingly sexist. I, personally, think they all started as a way to get away from the wife.
Wife: “Remember we’ve got dinner with the Andersons, and bridge after.”
Husband: “Oh, but dear, we’re killing Archduke Ferdinand and blaming Poland! Can’t we reschedule?”
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### Author:  [@WeRSauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WeRSauron)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/13 "2003-06-17T20:59:48Z")
Oy, great website, **FK**! 🙂
WRS
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### Author:  [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/14 "2003-06-17T21:10:45Z")
so sorry…of **COURSE** I meant Serbia:smack:
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### Author:  [@Searching\_For\_Truth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Searching_For_Truth)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/15 "2003-06-17T21:37:15Z")
You could always try bowing down to your [future despotic overlord.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=3578188)
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### Author:  [@Trigonal\_Planar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trigonal_Planar)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2003, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/16 "2003-06-17T23:46:15Z")
yvan eht nioj
yvan eht nioj
yvan eht nioj
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### Author:  [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)
#### Post date: [June 18, 2003, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/17 "2003-06-18T01:24:09Z")
Elpo ep; eg. All IV.
yvan eht ni?
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### Author:  [@Alcibiades](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alcibiades)
#### Post date: [June 18, 2003, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/18 "2003-06-18T02:42:37Z")
You could always start your own cabal. Get your world dominion gear at [www.villainsupply.com](http://www.villainsupply.com) They have a great range!
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### Author:  [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)
#### Post date: [June 18, 2003, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/becoming-one-of-the-elite/182535/19 "2003-06-18T04:19:24Z")
_Ia! Ia! Cxu komprenas vi la tutan teruron de la detruado, kiun ni planas? Subenigxu, la mondo! Subenigxu! Ni kreskas en la rugxo!_
[sub]fnord[/sub]