# "Been Through the Desert on a Dog with No Nose . . . " **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 30, 2001, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986 "2001-05-30T13:10:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/1 "2001-05-30T13:10:33Z")
Have any of the other Manhattan Dopers seen the Amazing Noseless Dog? Everyone at work thought I was making this up, till the production manager saw it, too. It’s a Golden Retriever, usually being walked on Park or Madison in the 30s. It looks like a healthy, well-kept dog, except, well . . . IT HAS NO NOSE. The entire upper portion of its snout is missing, so it has what can only be described as a Severe Underbite. I can’t imagine how it eats or drinks, or what happened to it—did it get caught in an elevator door in mid-bark? Did it sneeze so hard its nose flew off, in a Tex Avery-type scenario? I have the hardest time not shouting to its owner, “Hey, Lady, your dog has no nose—how does it smell?” ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/2 "2001-05-30T13:14:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eve \* > \*\*“Hey, Lady, your dog has no nose—how does it smell?” \*\* “Kinda like wet newspapers, why?” There is a German Shepherd/Bassett Hound mix in my neighborhood. It had the head and markings of the shepherd, but the body of the hound. Every time I see it, I just have to laugh, because it looks like the most happy and content dog on the planet 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/3 "2001-05-30T13:21:14Z")
I suspect this dawg is probably a product of the Dubya School of International Diplomacy. First Lesson: ‘How to cut off your nose to spite your face’ ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/4 "2001-05-30T14:47:59Z")
> [@](#): > > I have the hardest time not shouting to its owner, “Hey, Lady, your dog has no nose—how does it smell?” Eve, once again you are my hero. I just laughed out loud right at my desk, then re-read that and laughed again. I know it’s an oldie, but DAMN I love that joke. Anyhoo, I strongly recommend yelling that to her and reporting the results. I guarentee that everyone else walking in the park will fall to the ground in hysterics. Zette ---
**Author:** ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/5 "2001-05-30T16:06:01Z")
Is it really just the nose that’s missing, or also the upper jaw beneath the nose, including the teeth? Sad either way, but if the latter, sadder. You’d think they could perform reconstructive surgery, or at least build a prosthesis for the poor thing. It wouldn’t be a real nose, of course; more of a shadow nose. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/6 "2001-05-30T16:16:26Z")
Zette—So glad you enjoyed that. If I did yell that, however, I’m afraid she’d sic her dog on me and it would underbite me to death. Fiver—it is indeed missing the entire upper portion of its snout; its face goes right from eyes down to lower jaw. You really have to admire its owners . . . But everytime I see it, I can’t help skidding to a halt and doing a Marie Dressler-quality double-take. If only I had a lorgnette . . . Oh, another editor here at work says she’s seen it, too, so the production editor and I are not hallucinating. ---
**Author:** ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/7 "2001-05-30T16:33:29Z")
**Eve** : > [@](#): > > Zette—So glad you enjoyed that. If I did yell that, however, I’m afraid she’d sic her dog on me and it would underbite me to death. I’m sure she wouldn’t mind, as long as you asked politely. Something like: “Pardon me, I don’t mean to be overly inquisitive…” ---
**Author:** ![Spritle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Spritle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spritle)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/8 "2001-05-30T17:49:14Z")
**Please** tell me that the dog’s name is Tycho. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/9 "2001-05-30T19:02:51Z")
“Please tell me that the dog’s name is Tycho.” —I dreamed I went walking my dog in my Tycho Brahe . . . " ---
**Author:** ![Odieman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a87d85/32.png) [@Odieman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odieman)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/10 "2001-05-30T19:11:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Spritle \* > \*\ ***Please** tell me that the dog’s name is Tycho. \*\* And you thought your dogs nose was cold… ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2001, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/been-through-the-desert-on-a-dog-with-no-nose/66986/11 "2001-05-30T19:32:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fiver \* > \*\*Something like: “Pardon me, I don’t mean to be overly inquisitive…” \*\* I’m not sure if anyone else got that, but I personally found it hilarious!