# Behold, Jester, Killer of Threads **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 29, 2000, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178 "2000-08-29T13:52:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Zakalwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zakalwe/32/270_2.png) [@Zakalwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zakalwe)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2000, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/21 "2000-08-29T20:33:27Z")
I have to say that having seen MANY multi-page threads with **struuter** on the first page, she doesn’t have any right to claim thread-killer status. **struuter** , honey, WAAAAAAY too many people flirt with you for you to be a thread-killer. Please note that this is just jealousy talking, I want to flirt with you too! **Jester** , I think this is something almost everybody goes through. I know I did. Next is the “you don’t kill a thread, but your posts don’t get responded to” phase. grem ---
**Author:** ![struuter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@struuter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/struuter)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2000, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/22 "2000-08-29T20:43:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by grem0517 \* > \*\*I have to say that having seen MANY multi-page threads with **struuter** on the first page, she doesn’t have any right to claim thread-killer status. **struuter** , honey, WAAAAAAY too many people flirt with you for you to be a thread-killer. Please note that this is just jealousy talking, I want to flirt with you too! > > grem > \*\* Back in the day, grem…I could kill 'em with the best. And I still have the knack, believe me. Flirt with me? You say that like it would be tough to do. I’m a pushover… ---
**Author:** ![Jester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jester/32/8223_2.png) [@Jester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jester)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2000, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/23 "2000-08-29T21:37:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by struuter \* > \*\*Aw, Tymp. You gotta be so rough on the guy? I think Jester’s done remarkably well for just one month and under 120 posts. Can’t you cut him some slack? > > Hey Jester…don’t feel bad. At least he didn’t call you Mr. One-month-old Thread Killer. See? There’s a bright side to everything. _wink_ \*\* Thanks, strut, yer always a pal. I’m working on getting the calender changed so that I’m no longer “Mr. One-Month-Old,” but when I called Clinton he said he had to go have sex, and when I called the pope he said some mumbo-jumbo about God’s plan. Bastard. Grem, I think I’m in the transitional phase, since people continue a thread for about 5 more posts after me, ignoring me, and then the thread dies. Wait, I just called the Pope a bastard, didn’t I? Awwww…phooey. ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2000, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/24 "2000-08-29T22:25:49Z")
Bah, let this one month old kill this thread. _bang_ ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tof](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@The\_Tof](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tof)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2000, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/25 "2000-08-29T22:32:22Z")
You all are so misinformed. Look my name up, only the lucky few survive my cursed name. To prove it… I post here now. Screeme ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/26 "2000-08-30T00:37:03Z")
Me, too! (Maybe that’s why…) ---
**Author:** ![Zaphod\_Beeblebrox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/0ea827/32.png) [@Zaphod\_Beeblebrox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zaphod_Beeblebrox)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/27 "2000-08-30T00:46:24Z")
Bah. You’re all amateurs. Now that I’ve posted here, the thread is officially dead. You’ll see. ---
**Author:** ![Zakalwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zakalwe/32/270_2.png) [@Zakalwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zakalwe)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/28 "2000-08-30T01:28:46Z")
Sorry for all you folks that think you can kill threads, but there’s some flirtin’ to be done. The Goddess **struuter** has spoken. Please step aside. **struuter** my lovely, how YOU doin’? I’m not normally this forward, but how would you like to find a quiet corner somewhere and cuddle up together and whisper in each other’s ear (or anywhere else interesting)? grem ---
**Author:** ![wevets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9a140/32.png) [@wevets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wevets)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/29 "2000-08-30T03:27:42Z")
I don’t kill threads. I just maim them horribly. They seem to stumble pitifully on after I post without any real vigor or wit. Is there some sort of treatment or counseling available for this? ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/30 "2000-08-30T04:10:03Z")
_sigh_ Why don’t you just get the booth next to AudreyK and Myrr’s? BTW, since this is my second post in this thread, it’ll be dead in another day, two tops. ---
**Author:** ![steeljaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@steeljaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steeljaw)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/31 "2000-08-30T06:53:20Z")
Well alright, jester. I’ll change the calendar for you if you want. Seeing as how you’re my VP and all. If you want to start a support group for thread killers, can I be your VP, cause then each of us could be a president and each of us could be a vice president. See how nicely that works out? I don’t kill threads, guns kill threads. For any of you who don’t see it, there is a Charlton Heston reference there. If you still don’t get what I’m talking about, then it wasn’t funny and I never should have written it. Damn I feel stupid now. ---
**Author:** ![fierra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58956e/32.png) [@fierra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fierra)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 9:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/32 "2000-08-30T09:33:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tymp \* > \*\*Damn you, **fierra** , my newbie nemesis! > > [sub]I know you’re not exactly a newbie any longer, but the phrase has a nice ring to it.[/sub] > \*\* It does have a nice ring to it - can I add you to my sig? Not that I’m a name dropper or anything… (& I never tell lies either!) Steeljaw - if you knew the number of wonderful replies I delete at the last second, because I worry that no one else will get it…then I’d have a much higher post count & even more killed threads (& probably a straitjacket!) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Mermaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@The\_Mermaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Mermaid)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/33 "2000-08-30T10:23:25Z")
Mojo57 gives thread a hard shaking, slaps its faces and pulls it upright\* _THREAD tries to stand on its wobbly legs_ _READERS glance out of the corners of their eyes_ _THREAD takes a shallow breath and speaks_ \>Wow, that was close call, after that last post I thought I was goner fer sure\< _Mojo57 makes a pitiful attempt at humor and roleplaying_ _READERS are underwhelmed_ _THREAD slumps to the floor_ ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/34 "2000-08-30T10:29:01Z")
I must step in here and point out that no-one who claims to be a thread-killer has managed to kill this thread. While I’m here, “Killer of Threads” would make a _great_ name for a rock ba-…okay, okay! I’m leaving. Sheesh! ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/35 "2000-08-30T13:05:44Z")
Now the question: Will someone be the last poster, and become killer of threads, or will this be bumped in perpetuity? Too bad this isn’t IRC, we could say “Tune in tomorrow, same IRC time, same IRC channel…” ---
**Author:** ![struuter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@struuter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/struuter)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/36 "2000-08-30T13:15:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by grem0517 \* > \*\*Sorry for all you folks that think you can kill threads, but there’s some flirtin’ to be done. The Goddess **struuter** has spoken. Please step aside. > > **struuter** my lovely, how YOU doin’? I’m not normally this forward, but how would you like to find a quiet corner somewhere and cuddle up together and whisper in each other’s ear (or anywhere else interesting)? > > grem > \*\* Good God, man! Goddess? Are you trying to give me feart hailure? Have you any idea how embarrassing it is to swoon? Yet you seem bent upon my doing so… ---
**Author:** ![Tymp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Tymp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tymp)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/37 "2000-08-30T13:21:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by fierra \* > **Not that I’m a name dropper or anything… (& I never tell lies either!)** Go ahead and drop it. My name and a buck fifty might get you a cup of coffee if you play it right. ---
**Author:** ![fierra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58956e/32.png) [@fierra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fierra)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/38 "2000-08-30T13:56:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tymp \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by fierra \* > > **Not that I’m a name dropper or anything… (& I never tell lies either!)** > > Go ahead and drop it. My name and a buck fifty might get you a cup of coffee if you play it right. > \*\* Consider it dropped - but…I’m a tea drinker! ---
**Author:** ![Zakalwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zakalwe/32/270_2.png) [@Zakalwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zakalwe)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/39 "2000-08-30T16:38:27Z")
> [@](#): > > Good God, man! Goddess? Are you trying to give me feart hailure? Have you any idea how embarrassing it is to swoon? Yet you seem bent upon my doing so… Goddess I said and Goddess I meant. It’s appropriate since the feelings you inspire in me match the descriptions I have heard of religious ecstasy! Should you swoon, I promise to catch you and hold you in my arms until you awaken. I’ll try not to fall, though that will be difficult since your presence makes my heart go a-flutter and my knees go weak. I remain your most humble and devoted servant, grem ---
**Author:** ![struuter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@struuter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/struuter)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2000, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178/40 "2000-08-30T16:47:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by grem0517 \* > > Goddess I said and Goddess I meant. It’s appropriate since the feelings you inspire in me match the descriptions I have heard of religious ecstasy! > Should you swoon, I promise to catch you and hold you in my arms until you awaken. I’ll try not to fall, though that will be difficult since your presence makes my heart go a-flutter and my knees go weak. > > I remain your most humble and devoted servant, > > grem > > \*\* Heavens to Betsy. May I inquire as to what it is about me that inspires this? Not that I’m complaining, mind you. I’m just curious. There are, as you are well aware, many other ladies hereabouts that are probably more deserving than I. You know, don’t you, that talk like that will get you nothing but affection lavished all over you? _blush_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/behold-jester-killer-of-threads/31178.md?page=3)