# Being friends with a Trump supporter **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 24, 2016, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693 "2016-09-24T01:34:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/141 "2016-10-04T00:05:01Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > Because it’s good for your soul. It’s unhealthy, imho, to live in an ideological bubble. Real life isn’t a college “safe space.” It helps to challenge and have challenged world views. That’s how you grow as a person. What’s unhealthy is trying to coerce forcefully changes of opinion. This is basically the very topic that got me posting on this board to begin with. I hang out here, on the SDMB. I also hang out at Reddit. I also work with people who run the entire conservative-liberal spectrum. And every time I’m with family, I spare with someone on some political issue. Why must I spend all of my free time being “challenged”? At some point, it should be perfectly okay to surround myself with people who share my values and aren’t going to say something that’s liable to piss me off. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/142 "2016-10-04T00:06:45Z")
> [@TwiSpark](#): > > You know, I just searched the thread for the word “minded”. The only results apart from “conspiracy-minded” and “reminded”, were people defending themselves against a nonexistent claim that they’re closed or narrow minded. Perhaps you need to stop CTL+F’ing and actually read some of the posts. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/143 "2016-10-04T00:13:18Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > What’s unhealthy is trying to coerce forcefully changes of opinion. This is basically the very topic that got me posting on this board to begin with. Forgot to respond to this bit of madness. How is deciding not to be friends with someone–without them even knowing about it, by the way–coercing them to change their opinion? It’s the opposite of coercion. Seems to me that challenging someone, pushing them out of their ideological bubble, and ruining their “safe spaces” would be much more coercive than politely turning down their dinner invitations. ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/144 "2016-10-04T01:29:47Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > Because it’s good for your soul. It’s unhealthy, imho, to live in an ideological bubble. Hanging out with people who actively support destroying the lives of my friends is not ‘good for my soul’, it’s the direct opposite. Not wanting to hang out with people who are fine with making the state unlivable for some of my friends is not living in a ideaological bubble, nor is not wanting to hang around people who would probably try to ‘save’ me at best and kill me at worst if I has honest with them about my own life. ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/145 "2016-10-04T01:49:46Z")
Somewhere on the interwebs is a thread very similar to this one, titled “being friends with a Clinton supporter”🆒 ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/146 "2016-10-04T02:13:11Z")
> [@stui\_magpie](#): > > Somewhere on the interwebs is a thread very similar to this one, titled “being friends with a Clinton supporter”🆒 And that’s cool with me. I don’t want to be friends with someone who doesn’t want to be friends with me. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/147 "2016-10-04T03:25:28Z")
^ Ha, touche and well played. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/148 "2016-10-04T05:58:27Z")
Many people are open-minded and tolerant in the public side of their lives but not in the personal side of their lives. ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/149 "2016-10-04T06:13:50Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > I hang out here, on the SDMB. I also hang out at Reddit. I also work with people who run the entire conservative-liberal spectrum. And every time I’m with family, I spare with someone on some political issue. > > Why must I spend all of my free time being “challenged”? At some point, it should be perfectly okay to surround myself with people who share my values and aren’t going to say something that’s liable to piss me off. That’s your choice. Which we both know it really isn’t! Reference free will thread. But I enjoy my friends and relatives even if they have political faults. Half my relatives and in-laws, if not more are voting for Trump (for those that are actually voting). Even the ones that live in enlightened New England. For one thing, most people I know just aren’t that tuned into politics. They may catch a bit on the news or hear this or hear that but they don’t research stuff. They just know they typically vote (D) or they typically vote (R.) Or that the bastards in Washington have been there 8 years and it’s time to throw them out and give the other guys a shot. ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/150 "2016-10-04T06:18:19Z")
> [@Pantastic](#): > > Hanging out with people who actively support destroying the lives of my friends is not ‘good for my soul’, it’s the direct opposite. Not wanting to hang out with people who are fine with making the state unlivable for some of my friends is not living in a ideaological bubble, nor is not wanting to hang around people who would probably try to ‘save’ me at best and kill me at worst if I has honest with them about my own life. This is a good post and I understand where you are coming from. However, a lot of Trump supporters don’t believe that Trump will enact socially regressive policy. They believe that he’ll more or less MAGA by being tough with international competitors. That he’ll be an international Alpha dog and not take crap with regards to trade etc. There is a strange mindset that is mad at China but shops at Wal-Mart that is vastly more common than typically realized. But of course, if someone advocates violent or criminal behavior directed at others for no just cause there is definitely a problem. I don’t think anyone needs to hang out with violent bigots of any sort. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 10:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/151 "2016-10-04T10:20:02Z")
I have many relations who will be voting for Trump because they oppose Hillary. I can understand (most of) the reasoning behind that even if I don’t agree with it - not so much the “BENGHAZIIII!” crowd but those who are voting because they don’t want her appointing SCOTUS justices or passing gun control legislation or suchlike. But it’s the ones I know who are voting for Trump _because they like Trump_ that frighten me. Not because they disagree with me, but because even the most cursory political conversation demonstrates that they disagree with basic reality - they have adopted the basic Trumpian stance that "Reality is what I want it to be, and anything that contradicts it, no matter how much actual evidence there is (or how non-existent the evidence for their side), is due to liberal media bias etc etc etc. If Trump says he never said X, you can show them video after video of Trump saying X and all you get is “It doesn’t count and he didn’t mean that and anyway what about Hillary and Y?”. Thousands of Muslims dancing in New Jersey on 9/11? Yep, they definitely remember seeing that, and even if it didn’t happen it doesn’t matter because those Muslims would have done it if they weren’t so busy hiding their secret plans to kill us all. I said very early on in the campaign that Trump’s main appeal was to assholes who wish they could get away with being an asshole the way that Trump does. I’ve seen little to disabuse me of this view. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2016, 10:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/152 "2016-10-04T10:46:11Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > That’s your choice. Which we both know it really isn’t! Reference free will thread. But I enjoy my friends and relatives even if they have political faults. Half my relatives and in-laws, if not more are voting for Trump (for those that are actually voting). Even the ones that live in enlightened New England. For one thing, most people I know just aren’t that tuned into politics. And I am tuned into politics and care about certain issues (civil rights being one of them) a whole lot. So while I can get along with folks who run the political gamut–including completely apolitical–I’m not going to “enjoy” people who don’t care about civil rights and show this disregard by gladly supporting someone like Trump. I can get along with my father, who talks a lot of smack about a lot of things political. But if he were in favor of black people everywhere being subjected to stop-and-frisk policy, then I’d probably limit my social time with him because racial profiling is a big button of mine. > [@](#): > > They may catch a bit on the news or hear this or hear that but they don’t research stuff. They just know they typically vote (D) or they typically vote (R.) Or that the bastards in Washington have been there 8 years and it’s time to throw them out and give the other guys a shot. That’s fine, but that’s not how I roll. I want to roll with people who are tuned into important matters of the day and aren’t given to [sending emails](http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/teacher-aide-fired-calling-michelle-obama-gorilla-article-1.2816143) portraying the Obama’s as gorillas. If it’s wrong to have basic standards like this, then I don’t want to be right. But I don’t think that means I’m missing out on anything. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2016, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/153 "2016-10-05T00:51:53Z")
> [@TwiSpark](#): > > You know, I just searched the thread for the word “minded”. The only results apart from “conspiracy-minded” and “reminded”, were people defending themselves against a nonexistent claim that they’re closed or narrow minded. Just because they don’t use the words doesn’t mean it’s not the counterargument used by pretty much everyone making one. Plus, it’s what all the snark is implying. Also, your statement that the vast majority of people aren’t “monsters” is something I used to believe. I’ve since learned otherwise. They still are a minority, but there are more than you think. And every last one of them supports Donald Trump, since he is a genuine monster. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2016, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/154 "2016-10-05T00:53:55Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > Many people are open-minded and tolerant in the public side of their lives but not in the personal side of their lives. Tolerance of intolerance isn’t tolerance at all. You’re right back where you started, allowing intolerance to happen. Being tolerant requires being intolerance of intolerance. ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2016, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/155 "2016-10-05T01:00:45Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Just because they don’t use the words doesn’t mean it’s not the counterargument used by pretty much everyone making one. Plus, it’s what all the snark is implying. > > Also, your statement that the vast majority of people aren’t “monsters” is something I used to believe. I’ve since learned otherwise. They still are a minority, but there are more than you think. And every last one of them supports Donald Trump, since he is a genuine monster. That doesn’t make sense logically. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2016, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/156 "2016-10-05T04:07:04Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I have plenty of friends with whom I disagree, thank you very much. But Trump is in a class all by himself. I have greater respect for child molesters than I do for Donald J Trump. > [@TokyoBayer](#): > > I hate Trump was much as the next guy, but I also have known child molesters. While I like hyperbole, he is a different kind of scumbag. No hyperbole. I hate child molesters, but I hate Trump worse. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2016, 10:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/157 "2016-10-05T10:21:00Z")
Oddly, the friendships I’m having trouble sustaining are from the other direction. One friend in particular is a rabid Bernie-or-Buster and spews all varieties of anti-Clinton and anti-DWS stuff, some of which has a loose connection to facts but most of which is hyperbolic nonsense. She has now finally reached the “will vote Clinton to stop Trump” phase but I have to avoid any political discussion at all with her or she’ll go off like a car alarm. ---
**Author:** ![Fotheringay-Phipps](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d9b06d/32.png) [@Fotheringay-Phipps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fotheringay-Phipps)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2016, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/158 "2016-10-05T13:30:03Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Your posts on this board have indicated otherwise, quite a lot. You constantly defend conservative positions. This seems incoherent. Either I didn’t understand you or you didn’t understand me, or possibly you didn’t understand yourself. ---
**Author:** ![TwiSpark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@TwiSpark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwiSpark)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2016, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/159 "2016-10-22T20:18:43Z")
It’s not getting easier, it doesn’t surprise me at all to see trump support from the exact 4chan dwelling friend I expected it from. It’s the general “alt right” kind of edgy support of anything that requires being a dickhead and fitting in with the chan crowd. He was there supporting UKIP and Nigel Farage, the Tories, Brexit and yeah no surprises, Trump (albeit without the ability to vote, obviously) I think it just sucks when, you know, you get along with someone well, become friends, and they even stay generally nice in every other way but hang around places like 4chan and end up brainwashed into the alt right narrative on their political and social attitudes. It’s as if trolling has simply become so ingrained that it’s set into place and become genuine. ---
**Author:** ![AngelSoft](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/angelsoft/32/440_2.png) [@AngelSoft](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AngelSoft)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2016, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693/160 "2016-10-22T21:00:13Z")
My entire family is voting Trump. They are all supporters of him because he’s, ‘Gonna make us great again. Not like that liar Hillary.’ They all hate Hillary with a passion, thinking that she’s nothing but a lying politician who’s being protected by the government and the liberal media. I don’t even bring up the subject if I can help it, as it always leads to me being dog piled. Facebook got just, beyond ridiculous but I couldn’t un-friend them. So I just un-followed them. It’s made it so much easier not to see them all as racist idiots lol [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/being-friends-with-a-trump-supporter/766693.md?page=9)