# Best AIM Away Messages

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [July 15, 2002, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006 "2002-07-15T04:42:58Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 10\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\
**Post date:** [July 16, 2002, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006/21 "2002-07-16T02:49:33Z")

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Most of my away messages are one word, such as:  
downstairs  
up front  
sleep  
busy  
blah  
feh  
meh  
out

A couple are creative, such as:  
my solitare skills are for sucks  
out doing something, or here not doing anything  
God I hate zombies

A friend of mine has one of the best away messages ever:  
you, me, five pounds of peanut butter, and a date with destiny.

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**Author:** ![Gopher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gopher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gopher)\
**Post date:** [July 16, 2002, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006/22 "2002-07-16T05:22:47Z")

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One of my friends in his infinite wisdom decided to leave his computer on when he went out once. His away message said “went to Washington DC” The thing is, we’re on the West Coast. And it was during last summer, the height of California’s electricity shortage, and then he decides to waste more juice.

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**Author:** ![beegirl13](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/848f3c/32.png) [@beegirl13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beegirl13)\
**Post date:** [July 16, 2002, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006/23 "2002-07-16T05:49:12Z")

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Studying bodies in motion, then trying not to sleep through orgo, then becoming the world’s ultimate cockmaster, then eating lunch (since cockmastering is so exhausting), all while wearing my roommate’s dirty pants.

_Later:_ Washing off the sticky residues of cockmastering

Note: “Cockmastering” is an inside joke of ours that means playing badminton. But not everyone reading the message knew that 😉

A Poem for Monday (revised):

I couldn’t find anything good to wear,  
And I think I pulled a muscle while brushing my hair.  
Crap! that rhymes and i sound like a dork…  
I wish someone would just stab me with a spork.

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**Author:** ![TheOnlySaneOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@TheOnlySaneOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheOnlySaneOne)\
**Post date:** [July 16, 2002, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006/24 "2002-07-16T07:44:42Z")

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“Mwahaha. Though thou wishest to speak with me, I have departed from the vicinity of my computer! When shall I return? You may never know…Ha. Ha ha. Haha Ha. Hahaha. Hahahaha! Mwahahahahahahahahahaha_cough, choke, wheeze, puff on inhaler, wheeze_hahahaha!”

_sighs happily_ I’m proud of myself for that one.

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**Author:** ![Already\_in\_Use](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Already\_in\_Use](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Already_in_Use)\
**Post date:** [July 16, 2002, 8:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006/25 "2002-07-16T08:28:03Z")

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“I’m not Haydn, I’m just in the Debussy. I’ll be Bach.” It’s amazing the stupid things I come up with whilst sitting on the john.

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**Author:** ![Dirty\_Earthworm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Dirty\_Earthworm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dirty_Earthworm)\
**Post date:** [July 17, 2002, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006/26 "2002-07-17T07:10:14Z")

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This is an away message. I am away.

If you see the little yellow notepad next to my screen name, it means I am away.

Hey, guess who got a life? That’s right - ME! I am currently not here because I am out. (makes sense, I guess…) Anyway, don’t know when I’ll be back, but I will be. Talk to you then.

And my personal favorite is just blank.

-Dirty

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**Author:** ![Trancey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Trancey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trancey)\
**Post date:** [July 17, 2002, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006/27 "2002-07-17T07:11:16Z")

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heheh  
mine for when im not at the comp is  
“i seem to have wandered off somewhere”  
then for being out somewhere  
“where r u taking me? and why am i in a hand basket?” or straight jacket, seems to change every once in a while

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**Author:** ![XCchick22](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/e19b73/32.png) [@XCchick22](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XCchick22)\
**Post date:** [July 17, 2002, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006/28 "2002-07-17T19:01:30Z")

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Mine says “Away messages suck.”

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**Author:** ![TheRob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@TheRob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheRob)\
**Post date:** [July 18, 2002, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006/29 "2002-07-18T04:59:37Z")

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The one I use when I go to the bathroom, “making doody or pee pee”

For tonight, “cleaning up the mess you idiots made, while wearing the clothes that all the girls left here.”

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**Author:** ![LifeOnWry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/96bed5/32.png) [@LifeOnWry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LifeOnWry)\
**Post date:** [July 18, 2002, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-aim-away-messages/119006/30 "2002-07-18T06:14:02Z")

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“I’ve gone to find myself. If I return before I get back, please keep me here.”

“I’m sorry - the party you are trying to reach is sound asleep at this time. If you feel you have reached this message in error, you’re wrong. Thank you for using A Oh Hell.”

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