# Best and Worst ESPN dudes **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 4, 2001, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587 "2001-06-04T23:03:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Dignan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f07891/32.png) [@Dignan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dignan)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2001, 7:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/21 "2001-06-06T07:53:43Z")
I’m not a big fan of Stuart Scott either. I think he also gave the commencement speech this year at UNC-Chapel Hill, UGH! How bad would that suck. He’s a sports anchor. I like Kenny Mayne and Melissa Stark :D. Craig Kilborn was good when he was on too. I remember one lead in he had to some college bb highlights. An NBA highlight had just been shown and a player got a technical for arguing with a ref. Craig’s lead in was something like “and now on to the college game where all the players do to refs is point at a cheerleader and say ‘that’s my girlfriend’” Very funny! I also remember a comment he’d make about “you’re only cheating yourselves, young players!” Kind of a side note, but did anyone see when Ray Romano hosted SNL? They did a Sportscenter skit and Romano’s character kept saying stupid lines like “Sweet Sassy Mallasey” etc. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2001, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/22 "2001-06-06T12:04:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dignan \* > \*\* > Craig Kilborn was good when he was on too. I remember one lead in he had to some college bb highlights. An NBA highlight had just been shown and a player got a technical for arguing with a ref. Craig’s lead in was something like “and now on to the college game where all the players do to refs is point at a cheerleader and say ‘that’s my girlfriend’” Very funny! I also remember a comment he’d make about “you’re only cheating yourselves, young players!” > \*\* Kilborn always seemed to have a problem looking at the camera. He’s quite tall, and he always looked kind of askance, head tilted like a lost puppy dog. I wasn’t sad to see him go, because he seemed so smarmy. **DRY** , I think she was being half-serious with the “cutie” comment. Well, probably, anyway. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2001, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/23 "2001-06-06T14:25:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DRY \* > What’s the difference between: > \ Duh! Because I’m a girl, silly! And girls don’t know anything about sports! We like to watch the boys in their tight pants (or baggy as some pitchers prefer), sweating and growling and throwing balls around!\* :: insert blonde smilie :: Actually, my love of Kenny Mayne BEGAN as my love of his extremely subtle humor (that obviously sails over dantheman’s head 😃 ) and then I realized he was sort of a cutie. (Guys become exponentially cuter the funnier and smarter they get…well, not Stephen Hawking, but you get my point) And Melissa Stark… has always been stupid. I’ll admit she makes me mad because I’m jealous of her actually. I WANT to be a football commentator: “And here’s Ricky Williams coming off the field after that amazing 35 yard touchdown run. Let me give him a quick, sloppy kiss before I interview him…” 😃 jarbaby [sub]\*jarbaby actually knows A LOT about sports.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2001, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/24 "2001-06-06T14:54:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \* > And Melissa Stark… > > has always been stupid. > > I’ll admit she makes me mad because I’m jealous of her actually. I WANT to be a football commentator: > > “And here’s Ricky Williams coming off the field after that amazing 35 yard touchdown run. Let me give him a quick, sloppy kiss before I interview him…” 😃 \*\* Listen, toots (:D), you might be chagrined to learn there’s an entire Web page somewhere devoted to the ladies of the on-air sports press. People like Melissa, Bonnie Bernstein, Pam Oliver, etc. And I don’t mean devoted to their sports knowledge, either. (I forget where the page is, and I don’t feel like looking it up, but IIRC it’s sponsored by ESPN.) ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2001, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/25 "2001-06-06T15:14:30Z")
Maybe it’s just me, but whenever I see Whit Watson, he reminds me of an evil leprechaun. Chris Berman’s schtick is just a _little_ played out. Joe Morgan is a horrible announcer. Yeah, we get it. The Big Red Machine was good, but you can stop yammering about how you think every other team sucks in comparison. And every time ESPN cuts to a conversation between him and Jon Miller, Morgan is gawking right into the camera, ignoring Miller, and getting his precious face-time. [Rich Eisen] They do not get fruit cup! [/Rich Eisen] ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2001, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/26 "2001-06-06T15:24:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dantheman \* > > Listen, toots (:D), you might be chagrined to learn there’s an entire Web page somewhere devoted to the ladies of the on-air sports press. People like Melissa, Bonnie Bernstein, So…what you’re saying is, I’m right. These girls are propped up there to look at, not to provide us with any sports news. Gotcha. And how could I forget Bubbly Bonnie Big Tongue? Someone get that girl a scalpel so she can trim that thing down and speak properly. jarbaby ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2001, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/27 "2001-06-06T15:29:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \* > \*\*So…what you’re saying is, I’m right. > > These girls are propped up there to look at, not to provide us with any sports news. Gotcha. > > And how could I forget Bubbly Bonnie Big Tongue? Someone get that girl a scalpel so she can trim that thing down and speak properly. > > \*\* Not at all. The women who are there are in many ways just as smart as the men (not all; there’s no need to generalize). There are a LOT of male reporters/anchors who are incredibly dimwitted. To make matters worse, these guys are bereft of personality, too. And this means they have two strikes against them - stupidity and blandness. If the women are dumb, at least they have personality (again, generalizing, as some have no personality, too). ---
**Author:** ![HelloKitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ecccb3/32.png) [@HelloKitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HelloKitty)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2001, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/28 "2001-06-06T17:41:40Z")
Wow, no one has mentioned Chris McKendry (sp?). She is just horrible…I am still amazed she is reporting sports, she seems more suited to be on “Inside Edition” or shows like that. “JUMANJI!!!” – Craig Kilborn I just love Dick Schaap, and his son Jeremy is also an excellent reporter. I still can’t forgive Bobby Knight for taking that shot at Jeremy during his first post-firing interview–“You’ve got a long way to go to be as good as your Dad”. Jeremy was cool and said, “Well, I appreciate that” Knight was floored…he certainly didn’t mean it as a compliment, but Jeremy turned the tables on him–classic!! I agree that Chris Berman has worn out his usefulness. Robin Roberts is also a class act…she doesn’t have a trunk full of catch phrases, straightforward and knowledgeable reporting. A welcome change from some of the high-schoolish new guys on the block. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2001, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/29 "2001-06-06T17:55:34Z")
I dunno about Dick Schaap; I find him to be a little grating. His son’s voice, to me, is very annoying. Kind of a whiny, weasely voice… ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2001, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/30 "2001-06-07T03:00:50Z")
What does everyone think of Jayson Stark? I’ve watched/read him since his days with the Philly Inquirer, but I’m not sure he’s as good onscreen as he is on the printed page. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2001, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/31 "2001-06-07T04:39:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dire Wolf \* > \*\*[Rich Eisen] > They do not get fruit cup! > [/Rich Eisen] > \*\* ::cough cough:: Those who are late do not get fruit cup. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2001, 10:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/32 "2001-06-07T10:33:34Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by jarbabyj \* > **Duh! Because I’m a girl, silly! And girls don’t know anything about sports! We like to watch the boys in their tight pants (or baggy as some pitchers prefer), sweating and growling and throwing balls around!**_ See? We don’t get that. Very few female athletes have that type of physical appeal over us guys. That’s why Anna Kournikova’s so popular despite the fact that I’ve won as many tennis tournaments as she has! So we have to get our feminine pulchirtude (sp?) from the sportscasters. MMMM…Melissa Stark! \*\* > [@](#): > > :: insert blonde smilie ::\*\* Say, how’re you doing, **jarbabyj**? 😉 \*\* > [@](#): > > “And here’s Ricky Williams coming off the field after that amazing 35 yard touchdown run. Let me give him a quick, sloppy kiss before I interview him…” :D\*\* If Melissa Stark ever says this, I’ll REALLY regret not being an athlete. By the way, why are the CNNSI guys getting such short shrift? Fred Hickman is pretty good. ---
**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2001, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/33 "2001-06-07T10:36:46Z")
Forgot to reply to **dantheman** … Ya know, if you ever find that webpage with the chick…women sportscasters… And I agree with you re Jayson Stark. The guy’s entertaining and comes up with some really amusing statistical anomalies…but he doesn’t have the screen presence as he does in print. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2001, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/34 "2001-06-07T12:25:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DRY \* > \*\*Forgot to reply to **dantheman** … > > Ya know, if you ever find that webpage with the chick…women sportscasters… > > And I agree with you re Jayson Stark. The guy’s entertaining and comes up with some really amusing statistical anomalies…but he doesn’t have the screen presence as he does in print. \*\* Yeah, he’s very, very funny and talented, but his delivery is absolutely rhythmless. He makes me cringe a little when he speaks, because he stops at the wrong points, he rambles sometimes… Not crisp, not clear, not good. But he’s an excellent analyst… ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2001, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/35 "2001-06-07T12:31:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DRY \* > **Ya know, if you ever find that webpage with the chick…women sportscasters…** I checked, and the site appears to be down. It’s a Playboy site, if it’s the one I’m thinking of (did a Google search, and that _looked_ like the right answer…) Nothing dirty, IIRC. I’ll provide the link if/when it’s up, so I can verify 😉 that it’s not unsuitable for all. ---
**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2001, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/36 "2001-06-09T08:03:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dantheman \* > \*\*Nothing dirty, IIRC. I’ll provide the link if/when it’s up, so I can verify 😉 that it’s not unsuitable for all. \*\* Well, even if it IS unsuitable for some, you can always forward the link to me via e-mail. 😉 Any jpegs of Melissa Stark? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2001, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/37 "2001-06-09T19:33:18Z")
[QUOTE] \*Originally posted by DRY \* \*\* > [@](#): > > Well, even if it IS unsuitable for some, you can always forward the link to me via e-mail. 😉 > > Any jpegs of Melissa Stark? 😃 > > \*\* I got the link. It appears to be pretty harmless, even though it’s a Playboy site: [http://www.playboy.com/sports/features/sportscasters/](http://www.playboy.com/sports/features/sportscasters/) I know we’re not supposed to link to commercial sites, so …umm… pretend that it’s not a commercial site. Then again, it’s mostly pics. That’s ok, right? Right? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2001, 8:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/38 "2001-06-10T08:05:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dantheman \* > \*\*I got the link. It appears to be pretty harmless, even though it’s a Playboy site: > > [http://www.playboy.com/sports/features/sportscasters/\*\*](http://www.playboy.com/sports/features/sportscasters/**) Bless you, my child! 😃 I’ve never heard of Jill Arrington before. Wowsers! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2001, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/39 "2001-06-10T15:19:23Z")
Neither had I. As a matter of fact, I was listening to the syndicated Don and Mike show on the radio one afternoon, and they were interviewing her (apparently, they’re all buds). Naturally, the conversation was steered toward other babelicious sportsladies. When I got home, I searched for the page they were talking about… 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tof](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@The\_Tof](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tof)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2001, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587/40 "2001-06-10T15:55:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Snooooopy \* > \*\* > > I would also like to ask Chris Berman precisely why nobody circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills. > > \*\* The Bills were constantly going through obscurity and everything always seemed like they should lose. And yet they always found some way to win it. This happened so much that Berman started saying that phrase. Because nobody seemed to defend themselves and beat of their opponants quite like the Bills always seemed able to do. They were always the most resillient team. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-espn-dudes/67587.md?page=3)