# Best and Worst Local Business Slogans **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 13, 2004, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033 "2004-05-13T23:54:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/21 "2004-05-14T06:24:30Z")
I recall a garbage truck in Florida that had a motto promising free snow removal. I have often thought a great sign on a recycling truck would be, “A rind is a terrible thing to waste.” ---
**Author:** ![keturah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e95f7d/32.png) [@keturah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/keturah)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/22 "2004-05-14T06:29:48Z")
From a barbecue joint around here: “It’s the wood that makes it good!” ---
**Author:** ![cmason32](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@cmason32](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmason32)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/23 "2004-05-14T06:37:54Z")
In college there was a restaurant that had the following slogan on its sign for a few weeks: **Stay slim, eat trim** ---
**Author:** ![Saintly\_Loser](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saintly_loser/32/4045_2.png) [@Saintly\_Loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saintly_Loser)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/24 "2004-05-14T13:20:15Z")
Some years back, there was a sign business (making signs for stores, not signaling stuff). It was owned by, I believe, a Korean immigrant, and it mainly did business with the large local Korean community. The name of the business, displayed on their storefront and their vans, was, unfortunately, “Gook Do Sign.” ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/25 "2004-05-14T13:41:00Z")
The local funeral home in my hometown has a slogan that says: “We Specialize In Personal Service” Just what does that mean? Also a local automotive company where I live advertises: “We Do Things Differently Here” Again, 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/26 "2004-05-14T14:08:07Z")
There is a delivery business called “Guaranteed Overnight Delivery.” Their trucks just have the initials of their name on them: **G.O.D.**. Yes, some people have complained. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/27 "2004-05-14T14:52:28Z")
I once saw a tank truck for a septic system cleaning firm with the slogan on the bumper: “Don’t follow me. I’m full of S@^%!” ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/28 "2004-05-14T15:26:58Z")
There is a septic business around here that has the hilarious slogan: \*\*We’re #1 in #2 \*\* I just love that. ---
**Author:** ![Hyperelastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Hyperelastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hyperelastic)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/29 "2004-05-14T16:02:24Z")
> [@angelicate](#): > > There’s a car shop in my hometown that has a sign in front that says “Take a leak here!” > I think they also had “The best place in town to take a leak!” but that could be something that I saw elsewhere and am remembering it as being theirs because of the other sign. There was a radiator repair shop back in Ohio during the 70s with the slogan “A Great Place To Take A Leak”. That one still makes me chuckle. If you take the slogan literally, it conjures up the image of a couple of guys standing at urinals in a very nice restroom, saying, “Man, this is a great place to take a leak, isn’t it?” ---
**Author:** ![Necros](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/necros/32/11086_2.png) [@Necros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Necros)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/30 "2004-05-14T16:24:33Z")
> [@Shirley Ujest](#): > > There is a septic business around here that has the hilarious slogan: > \*\*We’re #1 in #2 \*\*. We have a canine excrement removal service around here with a similar slogan: We’re number one in the number two business. Their other slogan is: We pick up where your dog left off ---
**Author:** ![F.U.Shakespeare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@F.U.Shakespeare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.U.Shakespeare)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/31 "2004-05-14T20:24:41Z")
In my hometown, there was a hot dog stand a few years ago called Dick’s Hot Dogs. Their sign read, _If You Like Hot Dogs, You’ll Love Dick’s_ We figured it _had_ to be on purpose. ---
**Author:** ![The\_King\_of\_Soup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a87d85/32.png) [@The\_King\_of\_Soup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_King_of_Soup)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2004, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/32 "2004-05-15T04:03:51Z")
I hereby swear that, while living near Los Angeles, I saw a billboard for a car dealer famous for negotiating prices that read: “Bring your wife in and we’ll dicker!” I can’t prove it, I don’t expect you to believe it, but I will always believe it’s real. ---
**Author:** ![ageless6](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@ageless6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ageless6)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2004, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/33 "2004-05-15T12:40:19Z")
the King of Soup: Does the line,"Dicker,dicker,dicker,with Tucker,Tucker,Tucker"relate to your billboard? ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2004, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/34 "2004-05-15T17:46:44Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > There is a delivery business called “Guaranteed Overnight Delivery.” Their trucks just have the initials of their name on them: **G.O.D.**. > > Yes, some people have complained. I’ve seen those trucks. The first time I saw one, my office window faced Route 1. Hey! I just saw GOD heading north on Route One! ---
**Author:** ![Mirror\_Image\_egamI\_rorriM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e56c9b/32.png) [@Mirror\_Image\_egamI\_rorriM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mirror_Image_egamI_rorriM)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2004, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/35 "2004-05-15T20:20:09Z")
There’s a sort of lawn and garden care place around here called the Grass Pad. Their slogan? **"The Grass Pad’s high on grass!"** Their television ads have someone singing it, too. “The Grass Pad’s high on graaaaaaaaaas!” ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2004, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/36 "2004-05-15T21:34:21Z")
Right near the main cemetary in Stockton is a business called OK Monuments. Every time I drive past I make up jingles in my head. “When you don’t care enough to buy the best.” “Perfect for crotchety relatives who left everything to their cat.” What were they thinking? Also there’s a family named Butte that went into the medical oxygen supply business. Catching sight of the van that says BUTTE THERAPY our of the corner of your eye in traffic causes a definite double take. Again, what were they thinking? ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2004, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/37 "2004-05-15T21:38:26Z")
Can’t think of any local ones, but on a trip out west (either Washington or Oregon, I can’t remember exactly where) I saw a restaurant with a sign saying “Steaks so big, it’s a wonder the cows ever walked”. Cracked me up. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2004, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/38 "2004-05-15T21:49:35Z")
[QUOTE] Also there’s a family named Butte that went into the medical oxygen supply business. Catching sight of the van that says BUTTE THERAPY our of the corner of your eye in traffic causes a definite double take. [QUOTE] Butte Therapy. Heee. Sounds like some outcall gay thing. ---
**Author:** ![clayton\_e](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c57346/32.png) [@clayton\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clayton_e)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2004, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/39 "2004-05-15T22:43:00Z")
This is somewhat similar… I took [this](http://www.boners.com/grub/789060.html) photo and e-mailed it to a friend who later e-mailed it to another friend and so on. Several months later I got an e-mail from someone I knew a few down the line of e-mailed saying they’d seen it on that site from a link in something awful. ---
**Author:** ![biqu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7feea3/32.png) [@biqu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/biqu)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2004, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033/40 "2004-05-15T23:10:15Z")
Does anyone remember an ad campaign several years ago intended to boost the Virginia tourism industry? “Virginia is for lovers” is no longer a very appropriate business slogan, given the recent [legislation](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=255705) against gay marriage. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-local-business-slogans/245033.md?page=3)