# Best and worst names in sports **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [April 18, 2011, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867 "2011-04-18T18:43:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/1 "2011-04-18T18:43:53Z")
I just ran across [an article](http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/blog/big_league_stew/post/Astros-fan-learns-there-8217-s-no-such-thing-as?urn=mlb-wp3695) this morning about a baseball fan whose last name happens to be “Choate.” I was immediately reminded of pitcher Randy Choate, and I’ve long believed that to be one of the most unfortunate names in baseball. There is something really, really wrong with the word “Choate.” It conjurs up…unpleasant imagery. Anyway, it struck me as a good time to start up a conversation about some of the best and worst names (and please feel free to give your reasoning) in all of sports. So bring me your Dick Trickles, your Milton Bradleys, your Coco Crisps, and all the rest! ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/2 "2011-04-18T19:18:03Z")
I’ve posted some of these before. Sadly, most of the guys with great names didn’t live up to those names. Examples? In the Seventies, the NY Jets had a head coach named _ **Charlie Winner** _. Sadly, he WASN’T a winner (he only got the job because he was Weeb Ewbank’s son-in-law). Around the same time, the Phillies had a mediocre pitcher named _ **Billy Champion**._ The Texas Longhorns had a very good defensive back (he later played for the Chargers) named _ **Quentin Jammer**._ The Eagles had a pretty good receiver named _ **Mike Quick.** _ Decades ago, there was a very good defensive first baseman named _ **Vic Power.** _ Legend has it that he was SUPPOSED to be the Yankees’ first black player, but GM George Weiss traded him because there were rumors that Power liked white women. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/3 "2011-04-18T19:19:27Z")
[Rusty Kuntz](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rusty_Kuntz). ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/4 "2011-04-18T19:22:37Z")
Swisher is a rather unfortunate surname for a baseball hitter. Steve (the father) was a catcher, who sort of lived up to (down to?) his name, with a career .216 batting average. Nick (his son), an outfielder / first baseman, hits better than his father (.252 career average, with some power). ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/5 "2011-04-18T19:23:47Z")
> [@Tom\_Scud](#): > > [Rusty Kuntz](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rusty_Kuntz). Was going to mention him. His name does sound like a gynecological condition. ---
**Author:** ![Jas09](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d07c76/32.png) [@Jas09](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jas09)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/6 "2011-04-18T19:50:28Z")
[Stubby Clapp](http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/c/clappst01.shtml) was kinda fun during his brief stint in MLB. ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/7 "2011-04-18T20:58:00Z")
The Buffalo Bills currently have a cornerback named [Reggie Corner](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reggie_Corner). I can’t think off the top of my head of any player who’s ever shared a name with his own position. ---
**Author:** ![Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a183cd/32.png) [@Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barkis_is_Willin)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/8 "2011-04-18T20:58:12Z")
Phil Coke sounds kind of funny to me. Is he still with the Indians? ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/9 "2011-04-18T21:02:16Z")
Ralph Houk. I always thought that his name sounded like the noise you make when you’re coughing up a loogie. ---
**Author:** ![SenorBeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senorbeef/32/2220_2.png) [@SenorBeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SenorBeef)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/10 "2011-04-18T21:02:53Z")
The Browns had a wide receiver named Fair Hooker. ---
**Author:** ![installLSC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/54ee81/32.png) [@installLSC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/installLSC)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/11 "2011-04-18T21:09:28Z")
A pitcher named [Bob Walk](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bob_Walk) doesn’t exactly have an ideal name. A person who’s name isn’t ideal in any circumstance was Lucious Pusey, who played football for a college in Illinois. The mockery got so bad [he had to change his name.](http://deadspin.com/#!219327/you-say-seymour-we-say-pusey-lets-call-the-whole-thing-off) ---
**Author:** ![sitchensis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sitchensis/32/4892_2.png) [@sitchensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sitchensis)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/12 "2011-04-18T21:11:43Z")
Former NFL coach Dick Vermeil sounds like something you’d fight with antibiotics. ---
**Author:** ![Tanbarkie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a698b9/32.png) [@Tanbarkie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tanbarkie)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/13 "2011-04-18T21:26:38Z")
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you [the definitive work on the subject,](http://www.sbnation.com/mlb/2011/1/27/1944077/best-baseball-player-names-hall-of-fame) featuring such luminaries as James Baby, Wonderful Terrific Monds III, and Ugly Dickshot. ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/14 "2011-04-18T21:32:07Z")
installLSC: > [@](#): > > A pitcher named Bob Walk doesn’t exactly have an ideal name. But one named [Josh Outman](http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/o/outmajo01.shtml) does. ---
**Author:** ![PhiloVance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e19adc/32.png) [@PhiloVance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PhiloVance)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/15 "2011-04-18T21:36:47Z")
The coolest name I’ve ever heard of was Brooklyn Dodger [Van Lingle Mungo.](http://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GSvcid=205940&GRid=14908688&) ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/16 "2011-04-18T21:46:13Z")
> [@Tom\_Scud](#): > > [Rusty Kuntz](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rusty_Kuntz). A popular riddle 'round these parts in the 80s: What does a convent have in common with the Detroit Tigers? ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/17 "2011-04-18T21:52:12Z")
Here is a new one on me: [Kyle Sackrider](http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/player/profile?playerId=156791) ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/18 "2011-04-18T21:53:43Z")
There was an NFL wide receiver named Webster Slaughter. It would have been better if he were a linebacker or something. ---
**Author:** ![NDP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ndp/32/55_2.png) [@NDP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NDP)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/19 "2011-04-18T22:02:49Z")
[Mickey Klutts](http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/k/kluttmi01.shtml) and [Clyde Kluttz](http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/k/kluttmi01.shtml): their careers–as one might expert–weren’t that spectacular. Yet the fact these players were able to make it all the way to the major leagues with those last names is itself especially remarkable. As for cool sports names, I’m partial to [Bob “Death to Flying Things” Ferguson](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bob_Ferguson_(infielder)). ---
**Author:** ![Jim\_s\_Son](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19adc/32.png) [@Jim\_s\_Son](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jim_s_Son)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2011, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867/20 "2011-04-18T22:03:39Z")
THere was an NFL quarterback in the 1950s named Willie Thrower. He didn’t do much but then he was Black so he didn’t get much of a chance. Scott Speed didn’t show enough in either F1 or NASCAR so he is unemployed and suing his last employer Red Bull. There was a baseball player named Horace Speed who stole four bases. The Mets once had a minor league player named Ronald McDonald. I don’t think he ever made the bigs. But he was always asked “how could your parents give you such a name?” He replied that he was five years old when McDonald’s came up with their clown, his parents had no way of knowing. There was an NFL player named Cleveland Pittsburgh Crosby. He played for the Baltimore Colts. Shirley Povich was a male sports writer with the Washington Post. His parents were Jews from Lithuania and apparently it was not uncommon for boys over there to be named “Shirley”. Shortstop Mickey Klutts. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-and-worst-names-in-sports/578867.md?page=2)