# Best Bart Simpson lines **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 16, 2003, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716 "2003-10-16T02:55:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![pilot141](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e0b2c6/32.png) [@pilot141](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pilot141)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2003, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716/21 "2003-10-18T05:44:02Z")
“Oh, recycling is useless, Lisa. Once the sun burns out this planet is doomed. You’re just making sure we spend our last days using inferior products.” ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2003, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716/22 "2003-10-28T15:00:13Z")
“I must only use this power to annoy!” ---
**Author:** ![Aguecheek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Aguecheek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aguecheek)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2003, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716/23 "2003-10-28T20:21:09Z")
Bart’s brain: “She’s beautiful. Say something clever.” Bart’s mouth: “I fell on my bottom.” Strangely, I tend to use that one quite often. I’m not so sure what that says about me, but there you go. ---
**Author:** ![stpauler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2003, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716/24 "2003-10-28T21:25:59Z")
“Eep” I use that too much. ---
**Author:** ![Mazikeen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a9a28c/32.png) [@Mazikeen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mazikeen)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2003, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716/25 "2003-10-28T21:29:56Z")
Bart:(playing Scrabble with his family) K-W-Y-J-I-B-O…Kwyjibo. 22 points…plus 50 points for using all my letters! Game’s over, I’m outta here… Homer: Wait a minute, you little cheater–you’re not going anywhere until you tell me what Kwyjibo is! Bart: Kwyjibo? Uh… a big, dumb, balding North American ape with no chin… Marge: And a short temper! Homer: Why you little! (starts chasing Bart) Bart: Uh oh, Kwyjibo on the loose! ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2003, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716/26 "2003-10-28T21:51:59Z")
Used more than once, I believe: > [@](#): > > “I can’t help but feel partly responsible for this” when observing something completely his fault. ---
**Author:** ![Spurious\_George](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Spurious\_George](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spurious_George)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2003, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716/27 "2003-10-28T22:55:29Z")
“We’ll live like kings! Damn hell ass kings!!” ---
**Author:** ![Spudo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@Spudo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spudo)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2003, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716/28 "2003-10-28T23:23:03Z")
Well, of course the immortal, deadpan “Eep” is Bart’s best line. Among his other good ones however: _Homer is trying to come up with an anchor for the speeding monorail, and looks at bart, seeing him as an anchor_ Bart: Think harder Homer. Lisa: Nirvana Bart: A state of bliss obtained throught extinction of the self. Bart: I’m gonna fool you good Homer! Brad Goodman: What’s your name son? Bart: Rudiger Bart: Then, if I know my geography, it’s only 12 miles to Africa ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2003, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716/29 "2003-10-29T00:48:45Z")
Homer: Now, do you think you can stop the casual swearing? Bart: Hell yes! ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2003, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716/30 "2003-10-29T02:27:38Z")
(from the episode where Homer flees to a Pacific island as a missionary to escape the PBS Pledge Enforcement Squad) Rupert Murdoch, on the Fox TV telethon: “$20 million? You’ve saved my network!” Bart: “Wouldn’t be the first time!” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-bart-simpson-lines/207716.md?page=1)