# best boyfriend reaction to: with a girlfriend at a bar, and random drunk guy starts hitting on her? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 16, 2013, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-boyfriend-reaction-to-with-a-girlfriend-at-a-bar-and-random-drunk-guy-starts-hitting-on-her/647356 "2013-01-16T03:37:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Krouget](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b38774/32.png) [@Krouget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krouget)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-boyfriend-reaction-to-with-a-girlfriend-at-a-bar-and-random-drunk-guy-starts-hitting-on-her/647356/101 "2013-01-18T18:27:45Z")
> [@OleOneEye](#): > > I don’t think this thread would exist if lack of interest were stopping the situation - I’m going on the assumption that the guy isn’t seeing/taking rejection. Sure it would. There are enough cases where women have handled themselves in the situation described in the OP, so it certainly holds true. Is this always the case? Of course not. Your situation sounds like an example of an over-aggressive guy and you’ve stated he was drunk, which we all know, can act as a huge factor in any situation. In my experiences, there are only a few ways that situation plays out, and alcohol becomes the bigger influential factor, as opposed to rationalizing: [ul] [li]Your SO, or other responsible person, comes over to get you and removes you from the immediate situation, or if you still feel threatened, removes you from the location, entirely. Something along these lines is the best possible outcome. [/li][/ul] [ul] [li]The SO, or other responsible person, can walk over and try to kill the situation. If it goes well, the guy backs off (hopefully he has friends who can come get him). If things don’t go well, it may escalate into a physical confrontation between the two (or more). I’ve certainly seen the latter enough times.[/li][/ul] [ul] [li]Some person with authority can address him, such as security or the police (depending on location). This plays out similar to the above, only he can get “escorted out” and/or arrested that much sooner than the above.[/li][/ul] As you were left to fare, I’m not sure what the result was. Any given scenario can be different, if you add enough modifiers. ---
**Author:** ![colander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@colander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/colander)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-boyfriend-reaction-to-with-a-girlfriend-at-a-bar-and-random-drunk-guy-starts-hitting-on-her/647356/102 "2013-01-18T18:37:41Z")
I would murder everyone in the bar by slitting their throats with the sharp edge of the St. Pauli Girl sign behind the back of the bar. Then I’d go home and watch Seinfeld reruns. ---
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-boyfriend-reaction-to-with-a-girlfriend-at-a-bar-and-random-drunk-guy-starts-hitting-on-her/647356/103 "2013-01-18T18:49:50Z")
> [@OleOneEye](#): > > Okay, now I’m curious - how big/tall are the women who are just shrugging this off and expecting the woman to “control it”? I’m 5’3" and absolutely feel I can (and have, many times) control the situation as described in the OP. Any variation of “sorry dude, I’m not interested” is a good place to start. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2013, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-boyfriend-reaction-to-with-a-girlfriend-at-a-bar-and-random-drunk-guy-starts-hitting-on-her/647356/104 "2013-01-19T01:50:17Z")
It’s a public place, all she really needs to do, very likely is raise her voice. And you’re kidding yourself if you don’t think strangers are paying any attention. Not so, I’ve worked in bars most of my life and it’s not unusual for a guy to come to the bar and point out a drunk bothering women. Who then promptly gets bounced. I think it might be coded in men’s DNA to always be on watch over any women - pretty much all the time. ---
**Author:** ![jnglmassiv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f07891/32.png) [@jnglmassiv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jnglmassiv)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2013, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-boyfriend-reaction-to-with-a-girlfriend-at-a-bar-and-random-drunk-guy-starts-hitting-on-her/647356/105 "2013-01-19T02:53:16Z")
> [@elbows](#): > > It’s a public place, all she really needs to do, very likely is raise her voice. And you’re kidding yourself if you don’t think strangers are paying any attention. I agree. If I saw an escalating argument between an aggressive douche and a woman who appeared to be strangers, I think I’d come to her aid. I wouldn’t be leading with punches but I’d make sure she was alright. If there was security on staff, I’d try to catch their eye and motion to the commotion. In my younger days, I jumped into a number of barfights, pulling the actors apart. Pretty stupid, looking back on it. ---
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2013, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-boyfriend-reaction-to-with-a-girlfriend-at-a-bar-and-random-drunk-guy-starts-hitting-on-her/647356/106 "2013-01-19T03:08:29Z")
> [@delphica](#): > > Why didn’t she already take control of the situation? My “ideal reaction” would involve having a boyfriend who assumes I can act like an adult in a bar. Me too. If my guy starts appearing possessive, I might just leave both of them behind. If I want my bf’s help, I will ask for it. ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2013, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-boyfriend-reaction-to-with-a-girlfriend-at-a-bar-and-random-drunk-guy-starts-hitting-on-her/647356/107 "2013-01-21T16:13:38Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Definitely. Real women want guys to fight over them. The hard part is figuring out if they’re going home with the winner or the loser. So after you knock him out, kick him the balls a few times, that way if she goes home with him he won’t enjoy it. Thanks for concurring with me verbatim. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-boyfriend-reaction-to-with-a-girlfriend-at-a-bar-and-random-drunk-guy-starts-hitting-on-her/647356.md?page=5)