# Best Cast/Worst Movie **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 2, 2013, 9:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912 "2013-11-02T09:35:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![epbrown01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@epbrown01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epbrown01)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/41 "2013-11-03T00:42:12Z")
> [@sparky\_1](#): > > That doesn’t count. Heigl signed a contract with the devil to get into movies. The fine print said the movies would all suck, each one more so than previous. Ah, the Steve Martin deal. After the success of _The Jerk_ he signed a multi-picture deal with some studio and made a string of flops and weak performers starting with _Pennies from Heaven_ and ending with _Three Amigos_, I think. Soon as it was over, he made _Roxanne_. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/42 "2013-11-03T00:48:59Z")
_Short Cut to Happiness_. It’s a remake of _The Devil and Daniel Webster_. It stars and was directed by Alec Baldwin and it has Anthony Hopkins as Daniel Webster and Jennifer Love Hewitt as the devil. The supporting cast includes Dan Aykroyd, Kim Cattrall, Jason Patric, Amy Poehler, Darrell Hammond, and John Savage - so the movie had plenty of “names”. But it couldn’t even get released in theatres for six years after it was made and it vanished when it did. It’s never been released on video in America. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/43 "2013-11-03T01:21:22Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Recent releases that are supposed to be pretty poor: _Escape Plan_, Schwartenegger, Stallone, Amy Ryan; and _Last Vegas_ (Morgan Freeman, Robert De Niro, Michael Douglas, Kevin Kline, Mary Steenburgen) is apparently just awful. > > As for one I’ve actually seen, I give you _The Two Jakes_, the Nicholson-directed sequel to _Chinatown_: Nicholson (who should have stuck to acting), Harvey Keitel, Meg Tilly, Madeleine Stowe, Eli Wallach, Reuben Blades, David Keith, Richard Farnsworth, James Hong. Most of these people (with the exception of Tilly) can carry a film on their own. All of them together couldn’t save this mess. The Two Jakes is, IMHO, quite good. Not Chinatown good, but an example of a film that builds emotionally until the very last line “It never goes away.” And as fun as James Hong is in anything, he never carried a movie on his own, even as David Lo Pan, the villain in Big Trouble In Little China. ---
**Author:** ![LC\_Strawhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e19adc/32.png) [@LC\_Strawhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LC_Strawhouse)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/44 "2013-11-03T01:52:51Z")
How about **St. Elmo’s Fire** , or pretty much any other Joel Schumacher film? I think I read once that he is personally very well liked in the movie industy, so actors are happy to work with him. (It’s just too bad about how those movies turn out.) ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/45 "2013-11-03T02:13:02Z")
This movie is supposedly a perfect example of what the OP discusses. > **[The Counselor](https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/the_counselor_2013)** > > A Bentley-driving Texas lawyer (Michael Fassbender) appears to have it all, including a beautiful fiancee named Laura (Penélope Cruz) -- but his financial needs force him to become involved in an ill-advised drug deal. His partners in the venture... Big cast, big budget, big director with script by noted author make awful movie. I have never seen reviews of a major studio film be so brutal. It’s like the critics are personally offended by it. ---
**Author:** ![etv78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d78d45/32.png) [@etv78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/etv78)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/46 "2013-11-03T02:20:51Z")
**LC** -I don’t _think_ you meant to imply this, but Schumacher didn’t make _St Elmo’s Fire._ ---
**Author:** ![LC\_Strawhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e19adc/32.png) [@LC\_Strawhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LC_Strawhouse)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/47 "2013-11-03T02:35:47Z")
> [@etv78](#): > > **LC** -I don’t _think_ you meant to imply this, but Schumacher didn’t make _St Elmo’s Fire._ Whatcha’ mean? I’m confused. ---
**Author:** ![Erdosain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/erdosain/32/7284_2.png) [@Erdosain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Erdosain)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/48 "2013-11-03T02:35:56Z")
> [@etv78](#): > > **LC** -I don’t _think_ you meant to imply this, but Schumacher didn’t make _St Elmo’s Fire._ Huh? He directed it and co-wrote it. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/49 "2013-11-03T03:16:11Z")
> [@The\_Second\_Stone](#): > > The Two Jakes is, IMHO, quite good. Not Chinatown good, but an example of a film that builds emotionally until the very last line “It never goes away.” And as fun as James Hong is in anything, he never carried a movie on his own, even as David Lo Pan, the villain in Big Trouble In Little China. I may have to give it another try, but it sure seemed like a stinker the first time around. I have a soft spot for James Hong (and other character actors like Jack Elam). He’s made a great living off of character parts. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/50 "2013-11-03T03:20:57Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > I have a soft spot for James Hong (and other character actors like Jack Elam). He’s made a great living off of character parts. Truly, he would’ve been a great Sulu. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/51 "2013-11-03T04:51:29Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > Truly, he would’ve been a great Sulu. Jack Elam? As for The Two Jakes, the payoff for the whole movie is the closing, which is like the shutting door closing in The Searchers, which would have been a forgettable movie without the end and the door. Nicholson pulls off the same effect in The Two Jakes with the last line “It never goes away” the pain of the murder and his guilt in bringing it about, even two decades later. The movie, like The Searchers, doesn’t really mean a lot without that ending. And that ending would not have been possible without Chinatown. I don’t know a lot of people whose families survived a murder of a member, but I know one and met another, and the pain of such a thing never goes away. It is a scar so deep and defining and damning. ---
**Author:** ![etv78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d78d45/32.png) [@etv78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/etv78)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/52 "2013-11-03T07:46:11Z")
> [@Erdosain](#): > > Huh? He directed it and co-wrote it. News to me. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/53 "2013-11-03T07:57:12Z")
> [@epbrown01](#): > > Ah, the Steve Martin deal. After the success of _The Jerk_ he signed a multi-picture deal with some studio and made a string of flops and weak performers starting with _Pennies from Heaven_ and ending with _Three Amigos_, I think. Soon as it was over, he made _Roxanne_. I’m sorry, but \*Three Amigos \*is awesome. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/54 "2013-11-03T08:10:01Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > I’m sorry, but \*Three Amigos \*is awesome. Agreed! _All of Me, The Lonely Guy_, and _The Man With Two Brains_ are all pretty good, too, and they all fall between The Jerk and Three Amigos. With a few exceptions, Martin’s made much worse movies in the last 20 years than he did in the 80s. ---
**Author:** ![epbrown01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@epbrown01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epbrown01)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/55 "2013-11-03T11:44:45Z")
> [@Tangent](#): > > Agreed! _All of Me, The Lonely Guy_, and _The Man With Two Brains_ are all pretty good, too, and they all fall between The Jerk and Three Amigos. With a few exceptions, Martin’s made much worse movies in the last 20 years than he did in the 80s. Checking into it, it appears he made fewer films with that company than planned - _The Lonely Guy_ was the last, after _Pennies from Heaven_,\* Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid\*, and _The Man With Two Brains_. Four disappointing films in a row all they could take, I guess. I can’t speak to _Three Amigos_, as it’s got two highly effective types of epbrown01-repellent: Martin Short and Chevy Chase. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/56 "2013-11-03T16:57:49Z")
> [@epbrown01](#): > > Checking into it, it appears he made fewer films with that company than planned - _The Lonely Guy_ was the last, after _Pennies from Heaven_,\* Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid\*, and _The Man With Two Brains_. Four disappointing films in a row all they could take, I guess. > > I can’t speak to _Three Amigos_, as it’s got two highly effective types of epbrown01-repellent: Martin Short and Chevy Chase. Well while it can and should be argued that Martin Short and Chevy Chase are not funny actors, they are famous and well known actors. Would be surprising to see them in low budget cheapie film, even if that’s the sort of film their talents “qaulify” them for. ---
**Author:** ![42fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/4/b487fb/32.png) [@42fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/42fish)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/57 "2013-11-03T17:49:50Z")
How about “Mad Dog Time”? Its budget was $8 million, which wasn’t the bigtime for 1996. The main cast includes Richard Dreyfuss, Jeff Goldblum, Gabriel Byrne, Ellen Barkin and Diane Lane. Smaller and cameo roles include Burt Reynolds, Richard Pryor, Kyle MacLachlan, Gregory Hines and Michael J. Pollard. It was declared worst movie of the year by both Siskel and Ebert, who memorably called it “the first movie I have seen that does not improve on the sight of a blank screen viewed for the same length of time.” Richard Dreyfuss was an executive producer, which explains why he’s in it. What kind of pull he had to get the rest of the cast is beyond me. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/58 "2013-11-03T18:19:09Z")
**The Swarm** has an immense cast of big-name stars, and is absolutely and wonderfully awful. The original Arthur Herzog novel wasn’ bad at all (I read it before the film came out), but the film, which jettisoned most of the book, is amazingly bad. First of all, it was produced and directed by Irwin Allen. He got Sterling Silliphant to write the screenplay, which is more in the Towering Inferno vein of his career than In the Heat of the Night. Here’s the cast: Michael Caine as Dr. Bradford Crane Katharine Ross as Helena Anderson Richard Widmark as General Thaddeus Slater Richard Chamberlain as Dr. Hubbard Olivia de Havilland as Maureen Schuester Ben Johnson as Felix Austin Lee Grant as Anne MacGregor Jose Ferrer as Dr. Andrews Patty Duke as Rita Slim Pickens as Jud Hawkins Bradford Dillman as Major Baker Fred MacMurray as Clarence Tuttle Henry Fonda as Dr. Walter Krim Cameron Mitchell as General Thompson Christian Juttner as Paul Durant Morgan Paull as Dr. Newman Alejandro Rey as Dr. Martinez Don ‘Red’ Barry as Pete Harris Elizabeth Rogers as Woman Scientist (extended version only) Doria Cook-Nelson as Mrs. Durant (as Doria Cook) Robert Varney as Mr. Durant Ernie F. Orsatti as Duty Officer (as Ernie Orsatti) Patrick Culliton as Sheriff Morrison John Furlong as Cameraman Chris Petersen as Hal Jerry Toomey as Eddie Barbara Costello as Receptionist / Nurse (extended version only) Jenifer Taurins as Nurse (extended version only) David Himes as Radioman (extended version only) Mara Cook as Secretary Joey Eisnach as Bee Boy Stephen Powers as Radarman Chris Capen as Lieutenant Tony Haig as Officer #2 Bill Snider as Radarman #2 George F. Simmons as Nurse (as George Simmons) Arell Blanton as Sergeant Trent Dolan as Radio Sergeant John Williams as Launching Officer Steven Marlo as Pilot #1 (as Steve Marlo) Phil Montgomery as Mechanic Jim Galante as Doctor (extended version only) Frank Blair as Himself Marcia Nicholson as Captain Arthur Space as Engineer Chuck Hayward as Standby Engineer Glenn Charles Lewis as Chemical Warfare Guard Art Balinger as Radio Announcer Michael Sheehan as Airman #1 Howard Culver as Airman #2 Porny Stevens as Airman #3 Michael Caine, Richard Widmark, and Henry Fonda are particularly prominent and burdened by unspeakable dialog. For some reason, people had a love of movies about swarms of bees in the 1960s and 1970s. There are a lot of them, and they generally look awful, because the special effects of the time really weren’t up to it. Today, with CGI, you can do convincing swarms of bees, but back then the effects especially of the low-budget end, were appalling. The New York Times review of The Swarm compared the tituilar swarm to “a cloud of angry nutmeg”. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/59 "2013-11-03T18:49:23Z")
Another wonderfully awful film with Big Stars was the 1958 film **The Story of Mankind**. again, the book it’s based on wasn’t that bad, but the film is wonderfully awful. It puts Mankind on a sort of heavenly trial, with Vincent Price as “Mr. Scratch” (the Devil, naturally) and Ronald Colman as “The Spirit of Man”. That’s OK casting right there, but some of the rest is terrible: Peter Lorre as Nero Harpo Marx as Sir Isaac Newton Chico Marx as a monk talking with Columbus Groucho Marx as Peter Minuit (I don’t know whose idea it was to separate the Marx brothers, but he deserves to be shot. Chico is completely wasted (and maybe he was); I can understand Groucho as a wheeler-dealer trading for Manhattan, but what kind of sense does it make to have Harpo plaing a silent Newton?) Agnes Moorehead as Elizabeth I Cesar Romero as the Spanish Envoy John Carradine as Khufu Edward Everett Horton as Sir Walter Raleigh (!!! – this is almost as bad as Harpo as Sir Isaac) Francis X. Bushman as Moses (It’s like he and JohnCarradine switched sides from their more famous roles) Dennis Hopper as Napoleon Bonaparte (!) This was another, earlier film by Irwin Allen, who apperently kept making films with Lots of Big Names, hoping to get it right. He never did. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2013, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912/60 "2013-11-03T20:38:25Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > I may have to give it another try, but it sure seemed like a stinker the first time around. I have a soft spot for James Hong (and other character actors like Jack Elam). He’s made a great living off of character parts. On second thought, after looking at Rotten Tomatoes and seeing the 37% for audience score and a ‘meh’ for reviews, I’m sticking with my first assessment that it was a waste of talent dealing with a convoluted script. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-cast-worst-movie/672912.md?page=4)