# Best euphanism for going to the bathroom **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 23, 2003, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-euphanism-for-going-to-the-bathroom/170646 "2003-04-23T18:04:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![serefa99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@serefa99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/serefa99)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-euphanism-for-going-to-the-bathroom/170646/61 "2003-04-25T03:40:11Z")
as a nurse, when i require help from my coworkers to clean up the unfortunate incontinent patient, we call an unofficial code brown. ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-euphanism-for-going-to-the-bathroom/170646/62 "2003-04-25T04:40:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by World Eater \* > From the link above. > > Euphemism #89. > > People who like sausages shouldn’t see how they’re made!! > > Wtf? Seriously, you don’t get this one? It derives from an old slogan at the pork packing plant. “Everything except the squeal.” A knowing person, would retort; “They use the squeal for the noontime whistle.” Sausage has been the historic repository for all the odds and ends not fit for whole consumption. Examine the ingredients for most commercial _chorizo_. Lips, snouts, lymph nodes (wtf?) unidentified cartilaginous globules, spam and scrapple! A more recent adaptation of this old saw is; People who like laws or sausages should never watch either being made. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Saltire \* > In a linguistics textbook I once had, there was a discussion of slang which used “Australian euphemisms for male urination” as examples. The two best (or at least the only two I still remember): > > “Point Percy at the porcelain” > “Syphon the python” > > Sorry that I don’t know any good ones for #2. 'Strine euphemisms tend to be a bit racist … “Choking a darkie” or the more politically correct; “Throttling a non-white.” Their all time best euphemism for urination is; “Shake hands with the wife’s best friend.” Then there are the all purpose forms: “I’ve got to inspect the plumbing” or “I’m going to check the pipes” ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-euphanism-for-going-to-the-bathroom/170646/63 "2003-04-25T15:02:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Zenster \* > 'Strine euphemisms tend to be a bit racist … > > “Choking a darkie” > > or the more politically correct; > > “Throttling a non-white.” > > Their all time best euphemism for urination is; > > “Shake hands with the wife’s best friend.” > Then there are the all purpose forms: > > “I’ve got to inspect the plumbing” > > or > > “I’m going to check the pipes” \*\* Growing up in Australia, we used a few for urination, some of which have already been mentioned. Bleed the lizard Drain the main vein Siphon the python My favourite has always been Unbutton the mutton. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Stafford\_Cripps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_stafford_cripps/32/7167_2.png) [@The\_Stafford\_Cripps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Stafford_Cripps)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-euphanism-for-going-to-the-bathroom/170646/64 "2003-04-25T18:15:20Z")
\*\*Downloading corrupt files Performing the defacatory act Sending a message to Barking\*\* This last one is a reference to the enormous covered sewer that runs through East London and ends at Barking. People think it’s an abandoned railway embankment, and it’s visible in the titles for “Eastenders”. ---
**Author:** ![Walloon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/fbc32d/32.png) [@Walloon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walloon)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-euphanism-for-going-to-the-bathroom/170646/65 "2003-04-25T18:26:49Z")
The most common euphemism is in the OP: “Going to the bathroom”. People use it to describe visits to rooms that have no baths in the them, they use it to describe relieving oneself in the outdoors, and they even use it to describe the actions of animals who have never seen the inside of any bathroom (“Look, that elephant is going to the bathroom!”). ---
**Author:** ![the\_fraulein](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b77776/32.png) [@the\_fraulein](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_fraulein)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-euphanism-for-going-to-the-bathroom/170646/66 "2003-04-25T19:50:05Z")
My DH (an Army Ranger) is quite fond of saying he’s **“got a jumper in the door”.** [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-euphanism-for-going-to-the-bathroom/170646.md?page=3)