# Best. Fortune. Cookie. Fortune. Ever. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 9, 2003, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102 "2003-05-09T14:16:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![tds1273](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/df705f/32.png) [@tds1273](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tds1273)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/41 "2003-05-13T03:44:03Z")
This one I got two of in one cookie: “You will inherit a european kingdom” This one I got in china town on a class trip, I still carry it with me to this day: “Fat Fong Say: Me no come, Wife no come, Baby come, How Come???” ---
**Author:** ![elfbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b782af/32.png) [@elfbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfbabe)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/42 "2003-05-13T04:28:56Z")
I’ve gotten the “Someone can read your mind” one! That was great. But my favorite is STILL the one I got nearly four years ago while sitting in a Chinese restaurant, studying for a test in my Russian class. The greatest danger could be your stupidity. ---
**Author:** ![fessie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@fessie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fessie)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/43 "2003-05-13T06:06:12Z")
My all-time fave: “A room hung with pictures is a room hung with thoughts.” Also, got a double just the other day - two separate messages, both on the subject of procrastination. And I’ve got another on procrastination that showed up a couple of weeks ago. And guess what I’ve been guilty of lately (besides eating a lot of Chinese food)… ---
**Author:** ![Jervoise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d2c977/32.png) [@Jervoise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jervoise)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/44 "2003-05-13T06:14:05Z")
**"This insert has a protective coating"** This caused some confusion until I turned the piece of paper over and read the fortune on the other side. ---
**Author:** ![Jenaroph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e8c25b/32.png) [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/45 "2003-05-13T12:57:22Z")
The one sitting on my desk says: **The only good is knowledge and the only evil ignorance.** Yuppp, yup yup yup. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![mallocks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f4b2a3/32.png) [@mallocks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mallocks)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/46 "2003-05-13T13:02:58Z")
heh, some of those are class 😃 Wish I had their ingenuity ---
**Author:** ![NoGoodNamesLeft](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/8797f3/32.png) [@NoGoodNamesLeft](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NoGoodNamesLeft)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/47 "2003-05-13T15:36:28Z")
I swear, I actually got this one once…but lost it before I could scan it and send it into [ILoveBacon.com](http://ILoveBacon.com) : “True love is waiting for you The Far East Fortune Cookie Co. (416) 555-1234” The last line was just the name of the company that made the cookie, but it read to me specific directions on _where_ true love was waiting for me. I almost called and asked to speak with my true love. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/48 "2003-05-13T17:30:36Z")
_Signifies a favor or kindness from some you realize._ I think this means that somebody I know will do something nice (for me?). ---
**Author:** ![NicePete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ee7513/32.png) [@NicePete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NicePete)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/49 "2003-05-13T18:39:51Z")
I carry this one in my wallet, mainly because I received at a time when my fortunes and attitude had just taken a steep upswing: “Any rough times are now behind you.” Very reassuring. ---
**Author:** ![Ivar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ivar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ivar)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/50 "2003-05-13T19:04:11Z")
“Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your saviour?” I’m not kidding! And, it was meant as a joke. A Jewish woman who found this fortune had a conniption and the restaurant stopped printing that one. ---
**Author:** ![Ego\_Mk2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/58956e/32.png) [@Ego\_Mk2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ego_Mk2)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/51 "2003-05-13T19:14:46Z")
You have great physical powers and an iron constitution. (in bed) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Spiff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiff/32/9852_2.png) [@Spiff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiff)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/52 "2003-05-13T19:31:30Z")
You will finally start an SDMB thread that will be longer than one page. Hey, that one came true! ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/53 "2003-05-13T19:33:05Z")
My mother got one that told her she “will inherit the throne of a small European country soon.” She’s still waiting on that one. So, um, which one is it going to be, I wonder? Does Andorra have a royal family? ---
**Author:** ![PaperBlob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/58956e/32.png) [@PaperBlob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaperBlob)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/54 "2003-05-13T20:08:03Z")
**You will soon meet David Letterman** **Admitting ignorance is a sign of wisdom.** Currently hanging up in my office. **Will You Marry Me?** I put that one in my wife’s fortune cookie along with her engagement ring. Destroyed a bunch of cookies before I got it right. ---
**Author:** ![Copper\_Pin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Copper\_Pin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Copper_Pin)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/55 "2003-05-13T20:21:05Z")
I got a blank fortune once. First I figured it was a printing error, but maybe it was actually incredibly profound. ---
**Author:** ![AuntPam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc348/32.png) [@AuntPam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntPam)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/56 "2003-05-13T20:54:24Z")
Worked with a wonderful irreverent radio director on the 1970’s named Bill Gately (long gone, and doubtless cracking up the low-rent district in Heaven). We had a sportscaster who flew in to NYC every weekend from the Midwest who was totally clueless. This guy opened his cookie one evening and found the following carefully doctored fortune, which Bill had inserted after removing the original: WHERE’S THE TIP, ROUND-EYES PRICK?! He didn’t get it. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/57 "2003-05-13T20:56:00Z")
I got one once that said \*\*\*It is a simple thing to make things complex, but a complex thing to make them simple. \*\*\* I kept that one because (when I’m working), I’m a technical writer and that’s what I do–make complex things simple to understand. ---
**Author:** ![Skammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skammer/32/143_2.png) [@Skammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skammer)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/58 "2003-05-13T21:22:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NE Texan \* > \*\*My best fortune cookie ever was one my wife received. > > I took her out on the day after her birthday (thanks to a car problem making me miss the only hour she had off work on her birthday), and I was ready to ask her to marry me at the end of the evening. > > We opened the fortune cookies. Mine was utterly forgettable (and I have done so), but hers was: > > “Accept the next proposal you hear.” > > She did. > > I could not have set that up better if I had tried. \*\* This reminds me of what happened to me. I proposed to my (now) wife, and she accepted. She was staying with her parents and I lived in another city, and went home the next day. On my way home I spend the whole trip thinking about getting married and moving to a new city. I stopped for Chinese food and my fortune cookie warned me:It is not too late to take a different path Fortunately I ignored it. ---
**Author:** ![CaptMurdock](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/captmurdock/32/11736_2.png) [@CaptMurdock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CaptMurdock)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/59 "2003-05-13T22:00:06Z")
Damn! **Senglekat** beat to it with “…between the sheets!” For some reason, I always remember Jeff Goldblum’s from _The Big Chill:_ “Friendship is the bread of life…but money is the honey.” (between the sheets!) 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102/60 "2003-05-13T22:12:11Z")
We usually do the “in bed” thing, depending on who’s around. I was out with some guy friends who I hadn’t known very long, and got: “Versatility is your strongest suit.” I turned a lovely shade of magenta. Luckily it was dark. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-fortune-cookie-fortune-ever/174102.md?page=4)