# Best lede of 2014 contest

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lede-of-2014-contest/678066>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [January 6, 2014, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lede-of-2014-contest/678066 "2014-01-06T21:05:35Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\
**Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lede-of-2014-contest/678066/1 "2014-01-06T21:05:35Z")

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This sort of belongs in the skiing-is-dangerous thread, but I thought I’d start a whole new topic. Feel free to share additional entries.

From _The Independent_, just a few minutes ago:

“The new German coalition’s plans to hit the ground running in the new year were dealt an unforeseen blow on Monday with news that Chancellor Angela Merkel had fractured her pelvis in a skiing accident[.]”

That’s positively SNL-worthy.

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**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2014, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lede-of-2014-contest/678066/2 "2014-01-07T18:49:11Z")

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I’ve seen her hips. I’d hate to have been the tree.

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**Author:** ![Disheavel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@Disheavel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Disheavel)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2014, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lede-of-2014-contest/678066/3 "2014-01-07T19:27:12Z")

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[“Walmart Recalls: Donkey Meat and Collapsing Table and Chairs”](http://247wallst.com/retail/2014/01/03/walmart-recalls-donkey-meat-and-collapsing-table-and-chairs/) is pretty hard to beat and would have been unbeatable if the AP had gone with **Spiderman** ’s [“Your ass tastes foxy”](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=712047) although technically Walmart’s ass tastes foxy. The only problem is that they address the collapsing chairs first so the tainted ass doesn’t appear until paragraph two ☹

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**Author:** ![TheSeaOtter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ed655f/32.png) [@TheSeaOtter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheSeaOtter)\
**Post date:** [January 8, 2014, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lede-of-2014-contest/678066/4 "2014-01-08T17:40:44Z")

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This seems relevant:

[\*\*Hell Freezes Over, Headline Writers Rejoice  
\*\*](http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2014/01/08/260735693/hell-has-frozen-over-headline-writers-rejoice)