# Best limmericks (may be offensive)

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-limmericks-may-be-offensive/234176>\
**Category:** Cafe Society\
**Tags:** poetry\
**Created:** [March 14, 2004, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-limmericks-may-be-offensive/234176 "2004-03-14T02:36:18Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Page:** 6

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2026, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-limmericks-may-be-offensive/234176/101 "2026-01-23T17:53:47Z")

</div>

_From the rocks at the Cove of St Giles_  
_came a scream that resounded for miles._  
_Said the Pope, "Goodness gracious!_  
_Has Father Ignatius_  
_forgotten the Bishop has piles?"_

_A gal from El Paso named Alice_  
_tried using a Glock for a phallus._  
_But when things got hot,_  
_there was a loud shot,_  
_and her clitoris landed in Dallas._

_“I’ll tell you,” said Prom Chairman Rowse,_  
_"why Peggy’s the Prom Queen I chose._  
_She’s delightfully free  
as the wind on the sea._  
_And besides, like the wind, Peggy blows."_

[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-limmericks-may-be-offensive/234176.md?page=5)