# Best lines for "picking up" women **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 10, 2004, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043 "2004-12-10T00:56:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 10:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/21 "2004-12-10T10:13:00Z")
> [@bonzer](#): > > Hi, my name is …, > > Hi, my name is …, > > Hi, my name is …, Slim Shady? ---
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/22 "2004-12-10T14:09:44Z")
> [@jgroub](#): > > And also: Ever been slapped (or some similarly negative response, like having a drink poured over your head) for a line? Yes, but I was young and dumb and drunk. A friend and I were experimenting with a crude pickup line. It eventually worked, for both of us (him well before me), but it took awhile (the affirmative respondant also being young and dumb and drunk). ---
**Author:** ![Theodore\_Striker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@Theodore\_Striker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Theodore_Striker)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/23 "2004-12-10T14:20:35Z")
Hey baby, wanna wrestle? … usually ends up with an odd look from the female OR a sudden fit of laughter from the female (good thing, humor is the average guy’s equalizer), or the best response, a solid yes! ---
**Author:** ![stpauler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/24 "2004-12-10T15:21:25Z")
Sometimes, the best lines come without planning: > [@jgroub](#): > > OK, how about just doing me the service? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/25 "2004-12-10T15:36:51Z")
> [@stpauler](#): > > Sometimes, the best lines come without planning: Unbelievable. I came all the way to the end of this thread to make that joke and I was beaten out by one. bete SMASH!!! ---
**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/26 "2004-12-10T15:37:56Z")
Two lines from my ex-the-klingon’s much better looking older brother. “Hi, my name is \. How’m I doing so far?” and this faintly humorous one: “Excuse, me. I think you’re standing on my Congressional Medal of Honor.” ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/27 "2004-12-10T15:41:13Z")
“Give me ten minutes, a cup of ice, and your naked body, and I’ll make you forget your name.” Either that, or, “Hello. What kind of drink/book/coffee/detergent/bus pass/running shoes is/are that/those?” ---
**Author:** ![Angua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8baadc/32.png) [@Angua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angua)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/28 "2004-12-10T15:47:24Z")
> [@jjimm](#): > > Slim Shady? If it is, someone’s been screaming the wrong name for this past year. ---
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/29 "2004-12-10T15:49:21Z")
One of my female friends reported the most audacious one she ever heard (in a honky-tonk bar, no less) was: “Hi! Wanna go halfsies on a baby?” She responded enthusiastically, “Sure!!! But not with **you**.” It’s all about the timing, folks… ---
**Author:** ![jgroub](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b77776/32.png) [@jgroub](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jgroub)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/30 "2004-12-10T22:45:23Z")
> [@D\_Odds](#): > > Yes, but I was young and dumb and drunk. A friend and I were experimenting with a crude pickup line. It eventually worked, for both of us (him well before me), but it took awhile (the affirmative respondant also being young and dumb and drunk). Well don’t leave me hangin’. What was the line? Do tell! ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/31 "2004-12-10T22:53:25Z")
I am a level 11 warlock and I command you to fall for me ---
**Author:** ![jgroub](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b77776/32.png) [@jgroub](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jgroub)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/32 "2004-12-10T22:56:51Z")
> [@stpauler](#): > > Sometimes, the best lines come without planning: Yeah, I noticed this too when I posted it. I was wondering how long it would take before someone picked up on it. Get it? Picked up? BWAHAHAHAHAH!!! OK, not really. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/33 "2004-12-10T23:11:53Z")
From one of the Retarded Animal Babies toons: _Which one of you girls is interested in making a reverse childbirth film with me? I call baby!_ :eek: Not advisable in real life unless one has excellent dental coverage ---
**Author:** ![cuban\_ninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@cuban\_ninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuban_ninja)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/34 "2005-01-19T05:12:31Z")
[QUOTE=j And also: Ever been slapped (or some similarly negative response, like having a drink poured over your head) for a line?[/QUOTE] Yes once after a few drinks for explicitly requesting oral sex. I then realized that to ask her to take off with me for a week, of wild sex was totally out of the question. ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/35 "2005-01-19T15:06:20Z")
> [@Wesley Clark](#): > > I am a level 11 warlock and I command you to fall for me With an 18 charisma and full mana, you wizard, you! Huh. I managed to pick up a girl once by threatening to tie her up and tickle her. Never got around to that part, though. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/36 "2005-01-19T15:41:43Z")
“Baby, you look so good I’d bang you in front of my wife’s attorney.” If that doesn’t at least make her smile, she’s not worth your time. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/37 "2005-01-19T16:37:18Z")
Look guys…pickup lines don’t really work. If you come up to me with a glib, smooth, pickup line, I’m going to dimiss you as a player and think you do the same thing with every girl. I wouldn’t ever let myself get picked up at bars\*, but in just about any place else - start a conversation! I’ll let you know by eye contact if I’m interested. \*I never understood the whole bar thing, and I never will. Why would you want to be picked by/pick up a person who is intoxicated and therefore not acting like they normally would, not to mention the LOUD atmosphere and the impossibility of talking? Unless you’re just looking to get laid, of course, in which case what’s wrong with “Wanna fuck?” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Neurotik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/91b2a8/32.png) [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/38 "2005-01-19T18:48:42Z")
> [@jjimm](#): > > Slim Shady? Damn you and damn the Irish!!! I wanted to make that joke. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/39 "2005-01-19T18:51:42Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > Look guys…pickup lines don’t really work. If you come up to me with a glib, smooth, pickup line, I’m going to dimiss you as a player and think you do the same thing with every girl. > > I wouldn’t ever let myself get picked up at bars\*, but in just about any place else - start a conversation! I’ll let you know by eye contact if I’m interested. > > \*I never understood the whole bar thing, and I never will. Why would you want to be picked by/pick up a person who is intoxicated and therefore not acting like they normally would, not to mention the LOUD atmosphere and the impossibility of talking? Unless you’re just looking to get laid, of course, in which case what’s wrong with “Wanna fuck?” 😃 What about if you were indicating that you needed to get up for a moment, but didn’t want to lose your seat, and a fellow offered to save your seat for you while you were gone? Too wierd? 😕 Okay, I just asked because I was at a bar for New Years and there was a lovely woman next to me that needed to use the restroom but didn’t want to give up her prime sliver of real estate in the bar. I offered to save her seat for her while she was gone. It was a great icebreaker; _she_ bought me a drink of all things to return the favor, we got to talking, things got really swell, then midnight came and she took off ☹ Maybe I should have asked for her number. (too cheesy? I REALLY felt we were hitting it off. But then she left. Maybe not ☹ ) I’m not the kind of guy that will try corny pickup lines; women are either going to like me for who I am or they aren’t, but if I try something phony I’m just making things harder for me (and frankly things are hard enough for me thankyouverymuch). ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043/40 "2005-01-19T19:12:00Z")
I’ve had good success with “Hey baby, you and me and a can of spam…” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-lines-for-picking-up-women/279043.md?page=3)