# Best SCRUBS quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 16, 2008, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552 "2008-03-16T14:58:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![SaharaTea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SaharaTea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SaharaTea)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/41 "2008-03-18T18:51:24Z")
Elliot: Janitor, have you ever looked at yourself and wished you were different in every way? Janitor: No. I’m a winner. Kelso: “Paging Dr. Backbone to the bajingo ward.” ---
**Author:** ![JSexton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/96bed5/32.png) [@JSexton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JSexton)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/42 "2008-03-18T21:52:26Z")
[QUOTE=RandMcnally] His last name is Turk? All this time I’ve been calling him Turk Turkleton. [/QUOTE] Kelso: Son, you have to make some noise. No one in this hospital knows the name “Turkleton”. Turk: That’s because that’s not my name. Kelso: Not yet! ---
**Author:** ![JSexton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/96bed5/32.png) [@JSexton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JSexton)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/43 "2008-03-18T21:53:51Z")
Ooh, also: Carla: Why is there a pancake in the silverware drawer? Turk: I think you mean, why is there silverware in the pancake drawer? And JD: You’ve been _graveled!_ I like to use that on people who are walking funny. ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2008, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/44 "2008-03-19T00:17:05Z")
Janitor: We don’t just rock together, we _roll_ together. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2008, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/45 "2008-03-19T00:32:50Z")
[QUOTE=RandMcnally] His last name is Turk? All this time I’ve been calling him Turk Turkleton. [/QUOTE] I’m an ISO 9001 auditor, so every day I have to write a shitload of notes. Every single day I perform an audit, I always write, somewhere in my notes: “Well played, Turkleton.” Nobody has ever asked me what it means. I’ve been writing it for a few years now. Hundreds of official ISO 9001 audit records have that line in them. ---
**Author:** ![Frostillicus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Frostillicus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frostillicus)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2008, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/46 "2008-03-19T02:58:09Z")
[QUOTE=RickJay] On being challenged to a bet by Janitor: Dr. Cox: “Gosh, I’d love to, but I just don’t know what I’d do with a broken Thermos and two pounds of keys.” [/QUOTE] And from the same scene: Dr. Cox: “Well, it wouldn’t be the first time the janitor got the girl. (Pause) Yes, yes it would.” ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2008, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/47 "2008-03-19T03:45:29Z")
[QUOTE=Pullet] Everyone together now: _Payback is a bitch! clap Payback is a bitch! clap_ [/QUOTE] Damn, I was going to say that. Fell off my chair. ---
**Author:** ![JayRx1981](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/71e660/32.png) [@JayRx1981](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JayRx1981)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2008, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/48 "2008-03-19T04:05:41Z")
_JD loses to Kylie at arm-wrestling_ _Turk and Carla observe than follow in their example…with Turk winning_ DO YOU SEE WHAT YOU GET CARLA? DO YOU SEE WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU MESS WITH THE WARRIOR? ---
**Author:** ![Frostillicus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Frostillicus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frostillicus)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2008, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/49 "2008-03-20T02:56:59Z")
[QUOTE=JayRx1981] DO YOU SEE WHAT YOU GET CARLA? DO YOU SEE WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU MESS WITH THE WARRIOR? [/QUOTE] See post #36 dude. Here’s a classic: Elliot (to Dr. Cox): “I set up an ‘I Hate Cox’ chatroom. It didn’t exactly work out as I had planned. It ended up being me, two interns, and 14,000 lesbians.” ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2008, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/50 "2008-03-20T20:08:26Z")
[QUOTE=Frostillicus] See post #36 dude. Here’s a classic: Elliot (to Dr. Cox): “I set up an ‘I Hate Cox’ chatroom. It didn’t exactly work out as I had planned. It ended up being me, two interns, and 14,000 lesbians.” [/QUOTE] Yeah but I got to hear it three times now. :dons muscle builder pose: ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2008, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/51 "2008-03-20T20:23:56Z")
Not really just a quote, but my favorite 10 seconds: Dr. Cox: I’m sorry, would you please repeat the question? Carla: Are you just gonna roll over like that? Jordan: That’s weird, I asked him the same thing last night. Carla: Where’s the outrage? The anger? The hate? Jordan: Again, last night! Carla: You’ve gone soft. Jordan: [gasps] Okay, now it’s getting spooky. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2008, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552/52 "2008-03-20T20:30:02Z")
[QUOTE=Bosstone] Knife-wreeeench! [/QUOTE] For kids! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-scrubs-quotes/441552.md?page=2)