# Best Songs about Whiney Losers... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 16, 2009, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485 "2009-12-16T15:47:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/61 "2009-12-17T22:35:44Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > Well, I went and … listened to a bunch of Everly Brothers songs. I think they should get an award for lifetime achievement in whiney loser songs. Well, it _was_ sad that they could never go out except when it was raining, so you wouldn’t notice the tears in their eyes. That was Roy Orbison’s advantage. As he was wearing shades all the time, no one could tell if he was weeping or not. ---
**Author:** ![kevja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/aeb1de/32.png) [@kevja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kevja)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2009, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/62 "2009-12-18T02:50:49Z")
running scared by roy orbison. i think he’s one of the best ever, but he’s just a little bit too worried about losing his girl. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2009, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/63 "2009-12-18T17:13:16Z")
“You Don’t Know Me” by Ray Charles “Lonely Man There on the Corner” by Genesis ---
**Author:** ![devilsknew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4da419/32.png) [@devilsknew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/devilsknew)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2009, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/64 "2009-12-18T17:38:38Z")
Pretty much anything by [Three Doors Down](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kPBzTxZQG5Q). Man, that bands singer songwriter is a whiney loser that caters to whiney losers. ---
**Author:** ![Noel\_Prosequi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b19c9b/32.png) [@Noel\_Prosequi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noel_Prosequi)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/65 "2009-12-19T06:58:01Z")
[Kentucky Rain](http://www.metrolyrics.com/kentucky-rain-lyrics-elvis-presley.html)by Elvis has to be one of my all-time favourites for this. Great song, of course, but seriously creepy stalker territory. “I’ve loved you much too long, my love’s too strong” Gack. And pissing on about the rain in his shoe? Please. She dumped and ran. For evidently good reasons. It happens. Deal. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/66 "2009-12-19T07:01:30Z")
I don’t really care about the lyrics in _Lovefool_ - the instrumentals of the song are good. I think it’s one of the best pop melodies of the late 1990s. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/67 "2009-12-19T16:16:19Z")
> [@Munch](#): > > Hail to the Victors > > 🙂 :mad:☹ There are an asston of a songs out there about whiny losers, but few of them are actually good. I find my tolerance for whiny shit decreases significantly with every passing year of my life. That said, Beck’s ‘‘Loser’’ and The Offspring’s ‘‘Self-Esteem’’ are both phenomenal songs. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/68 "2009-12-19T16:26:57Z")
The all-time mother of all whiney loser songs: “The Man That Got Away”: \*The night is bitter, The stars have lost their glitter; The winds grow colder And suddenly you’re older - And all because of the man that got away. . . . Ever since this world began There is nothing sadder than A one-man woman looking for The man that got away. \* But it’s still a great song. ---
**Author:** ![KennerTheGreat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a8b319/32.png) [@KennerTheGreat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KennerTheGreat)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/69 "2009-12-19T19:21:29Z")
Hedley is a walking, talking Crowing Moment of Whine, IMHO, but [For The Nights I Can’t Remember](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=itqs23XOAyE) probably takes the cake. ---
**Author:** ![melodyharmonius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/melodyharmonius/32/21310_2.png) [@melodyharmonius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/melodyharmonius)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/70 "2009-12-22T14:42:07Z")
> [@Noel\_Prosequi](#): > > [Kentucky Rain](http://www.metrolyrics.com/kentucky-rain-lyrics-elvis-presley.html)by Elvis has to be one of my all-time favourites for this. Great song, of course, but seriously creepy stalker territory. > > “I’ve loved you much too long, my love’s too strong” > > Gack. > > And pissing on about the rain in his shoe? Please. She dumped and ran. For evidently good reasons. It happens. Deal. I have to disagree with this one. Because he doesn’t know why she left. You never know - she could have been abducted by aliens. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/71 "2009-12-22T15:37:46Z")
_Ballad of the Green Berets_ by Staff Sergeant Barry Sadler. Suck it up boy, you’re all volunteers. ---
**Author:** ![choie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/choie/32/7829_2.png) [@choie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/choie)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/72 "2009-12-22T17:51:59Z")
Jonathan Coulton excels at mocking whiny losers, especially passive aggressive ones. Note to mods: Coulton releases his work under [Creative Commons Attribution/Noncommercial License](http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/3.0/), and it’s perfectly cool to share the lyrics provided we attribute and link back. Even so I’m not quoting the whole thing. 🙂 **Not About You** : I haven’t thought of you in fifteen days and today I still won’t think of you And when I call you up and you’re not home, Well I might not even care Every day gets better than the one before Cause every day I know that I’m fine without you But I don’t think about it (snip chorus) Every time I ride past your house I forget it’s you who’s living there Anyway I never see your face cause your window’s up too high And I saw you shopping at the grocery store But I was far too busy with my cart to notice You weren’t looking at me (snip chorus) I saw that movie where the guy gets dumped when the girl goes off to find herself But I think I may have missed the end - there was something in my eye… ## [Full lyrics & song here](http://www.jonathancoulton.com/songdetails/Not%20About%20You) Nerdy high school guy complaining about getting his heart broken and plotting revenge in **The Future Soon** : Last week I left a note on Laura’s desk It said ‘I love you’ signed anonymous friend Turns out she’s smarter than I thought she was She knows I wrote it, now the whole class does too And I’m all alone during couple skate When she skates by with some guy on her arm But I know that I’ll forget the look of pity in her face When I’m living in my solar dome on a platform in space Cause it’s gonna be the future soon And I won’t always be this way When the things that make me weak and strange get engineered away It’s gonna be the future soon I’ve never seen it quite so clear And when my heart is breaking I can close my eyes and it’s already here I’ll probably be some kind of scientist Building inventions in my space lab in space I’ll end world hunger I’ll make dolphins speak Work through the daytime, spend my nights and weekends Perfecting my warrior robot race Building them one laser gun at a time I will do my best to teach them About life and what it’s worth I just hope that I can keep them from destroying the earth… [Full lyrics & song here](http://www.jonathancoulton.com/songdetails/The%20Future%20Soon) * * * And for whiny loser most likely to turn into a stalker, there’s **Make You Cry** : I drove seven hours All day to see you The least that you could do is be at home I wait outside your front door I guess that I surprised us both When you get home you’re not alone The way I thought you’d be You introduce your friend On some sunny day you’re gonna fall for me The way I fell for you That’s when I’m gonna make you cry (snip) I leave another message That’s two this morning My fingers crossed I wait for you to call I feel it getting closer I’ll wait forever, I know Brick by brick I’m breaking down the wall And when we’re side by side I’ll build it up again That’s when I’m gonna make you cry [Full lyrics & song here](http://www.jonathancoulton.com/songdetails/Make%20You%20Cry) * * * Finally there’s possibly his best/worst example of a manipulative whiny loser: **Take Care of Me** : I woke up with a headache Slept too late and my coffee turned cold Nobody got me my breakfast My eyes are tired and my body feels old And no one seems to care I’m looking at you when I say that Why don’t you take care of me? When you know that I can’t take care of myself? I think this handle is broken No one can fix it cause no one knows how That’s not the pen that I wanted Come and look what you made me do now I’m not surprised at all I know how it goes. I get it. (snip) I see you’re busy with something Go ahead and finish I swear it’s alright I’ll just sit here in the dark then With no one helping me turn on the light… [Full lyrics and song here](http://www.jonathancoulton.com/songdetails/Take%20Care%20of%20Me) ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/73 "2009-12-22T18:19:02Z")
I found that Weird Al’s “Angry White Boy Polka” did a great job pointing out how whiny a lot of those songs are. Another one is probably “Everything You Want” by Vertical Horizon. And pretty much anything by Blink-182 that got radio play. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/74 "2009-12-22T18:51:25Z")
_Hound Dog_, by Elvis Presley. Seriously, did I miss it or did it take 74 posts for us to get there? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/75 "2009-12-22T19:09:53Z")
> [@asterion](#): > > I found that Weird Al’s “Angry White Boy Polka” did a great job pointing out how whiny a lot of those songs are. > > Another one is probably “Everything You Want” by Vertical Horizon. And pretty much anything by Blink-182 that got radio play. In that vein, Linkin Park - from “Breaking the Habit” - "I hurt much more Than any time before I had no options left again I don’t want to be the one The battles always choose 'Cause inside I realize That I’m the one confused" Wah fucking wah. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/76 "2009-12-22T19:45:33Z")
Pretty much anything by Bright Eyes. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/77 "2009-12-22T19:58:35Z")
_The Ballad of Who Could Care Less_, by Ben Folds was the song that popped into my head when I saw the thread title. It could be written about people I went to high school with. Or hell, I bet we all went to high school with those people. ---
**Author:** ![yoyodyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a9a28c/32.png) [@yoyodyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yoyodyne)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/78 "2009-12-22T20:20:42Z")
Puddle of Mudd - She Fuckin’ Hates Me ---
**Author:** ![torie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@torie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/torie)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/79 "2009-12-22T20:40:01Z")
Cher’s _I Found Someone_, which I think was written by Michael Bolton. Basically, “Wah, you were so mean to me and broke up with me even though I’m totally awesome but now I have a new boyfriend and he’s so much better than you so I TOTALLY don’t care about you anymore so Nyah.” If you don’t care so much, why go out of your way to point out your cool new boyfriend? Did the addition of a man to your life finally give you the moral superiority required to take your ex to task for treating you like garbage, because otherwise, clearly you mean nothing? Does your new man prove definitively that your ex was wrong and a bad bad man? Or maybe he left you because you are a co-dependent **loser**? Carrie Underwood, _Before He Cheats_. First off, destroying expensive personal property because you were cheated on is beyond lame. You need perspective. Further “Carved my name into his leather seats”??? WHAT? Are you seriously such an idiot that you don’t realize the potential consequences of leaving your name at the scene of a crime that involves the destruction of very expensive property? Maybe he’s cheating because you’re such a whiny idiot that even the bleached blond tramp doing the bad Shania karaoke provides more intellectual stimulation than you! Now, go home and study the ins and outs of forensics before you attempt another major crime in an attempt to obtain moral superiority. Thank you. Rant over. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2009, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485/80 "2009-12-22T21:38:35Z")
Well does "best " mean the song that is actually best musically and that happens to be about some schmendrick or is it just the whiniest lyrics / voice combo? My favorites, as in I actually like the songs , have been mentioned, so I’ll throw out Kelly Clarkson’s “Because of You”. Good god, what self pitying, whiny, cliched dreck. [Here’s the loser’s lament in it’s vomitocious entirety](http://www.metrolyrics.com/because-of-you-lyrics-kelly-clarkson.html). “…because of you I find it hard to trust not only me but everyone around me. Because of you I am afraid” Gah. Bitch is so deep in her pitty pot she can’t be bothered to stick to any kind of meter or rhyme scheme. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-songs-about-whiney-losers/521485.md?page=5)