# Best spam evar **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 27, 2017, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281 "2017-01-27T01:24:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/1 "2017-01-27T01:24:56Z")
I just had to share this. This came in as spam recently on the board and it has been deleted it. But I wonder how many customers they get aside from other robots: [QUOTE=some spammer] Now a day, essay writing is the most terrible problem of each college and school students. They need to write many essay paper on different topics. If student concentrate only in essay writing task they can’t perform well in academic period. There are many other things to be performing simultaneously. So essay writing consider as a devil of the students. Then students start finding some easy way to write their essay. As the development of internet we can solve this writing problem easily. There are many essay writing services online are available to help student who are unable to perform write my custom paper task or not confident in their writing skill. They give some guidance and tutoring and also giving custom essay online paper as per the requirement of customer or student. This is the main reason behind every student who prefers \*\*\*\*\* to complete their essays. \*\*\*\*\*\* always providing best essay writing help for student. Hence most of the students are following the online writing service help from \*\*\*\*\*. They may get many benefits for this service. The custom paper from \*\*\*\*\* will be the best one in case of quality and content. also. [/QUOTE] Name of company deleted. The website it linked to looked very professional aside from the fact that the English was just as bad. ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/2 "2017-01-27T01:29:55Z")
I enjoy my custom paper task. No thank you devil work. I may get many benefits from your best one! Wooo! (P.S. I don’t mind if your English is bad. Just don’t try to get me to pay you for it! lol) ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/3 "2017-01-27T03:14:53Z")
One of my old job duties was to review applicants’ writing portfolios. I’ve seen worse. ---
**Author:** ![harmonicamoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/65b543/32.png) [@harmonicamoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmonicamoon)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/4 "2017-01-27T03:35:32Z")
Put in some paragraphs and I could read it. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/5 "2017-01-27T07:31:27Z")
It’s like getting advanced math tutoring from someone who can’t count to ten. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/6 "2017-01-27T14:35:10Z")
> [@harmonicamoon](#): > > Put in some paragraphs and I could read it. That’s the main problem you see with it.:dubious: ---
**Author:** ![BobArrgh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobarrgh/32/2881_2.png) [@BobArrgh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobArrgh)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/7 "2017-01-27T15:02:09Z")
I am so confuseds. Most time, the company name is \*\*\*\*\*. I vouchsafe \*\*\*\*\*, it are good company and all essay I buying from them work good for grade. But one time, writer say \*\*\*\*\*\*. That company is devil work himself. Please, dont use \*\*\*\*\*\*, they takes all you’re moneys and never giving essay. You loose good moneys if you try \*\*\*\*\*\*. ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/8 "2017-01-27T20:26:09Z")
> [@harmonicamoon](#): > > Put in some paragraphs and I could read it. > [@Colibri](#): > > That’s the main problem you see with it.:dubious: I suspect that without reading it, that’s the only problem you would see. Because **harmonicamoon** made reformatting a prerequisite of reading it, and the other issues are only uncovered by reading. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/9 "2017-01-27T21:16:28Z")
Will they use all modalities to ensure your good essay is writing? ---
**Author:** ![harmonicamoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/65b543/32.png) [@harmonicamoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmonicamoon)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/10 "2017-01-27T21:26:20Z")
> [@gnoitall](#): > > I suspect that without reading it, that’s the only problem you would see. Because **harmonicamoon** made reformatting a prerequisite of reading it, and the other issues are only uncovered by reading. Exactly. I attempted to read it. But I love (need) paragraph breaks. Hence, I was unable (unwilling) to digest it. ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/11 "2017-01-27T21:27:01Z")
I saw my new puppy do a custom paper task. I don’t think it involved writing though. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/12 "2017-01-27T21:42:51Z")
> [@harmonicamoon](#): > > Exactly. I attempted to read it. But I love (need) paragraph breaks. > > Hence, I was unable (unwilling) to digest it. If you were unwilling to read it, why did you even bother commenting on it.:dubious: ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/13 "2017-01-27T21:57:42Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > If you were unwilling to read it, why did you even bother commenting on it.:dubious: I think the formatting issue is sufficient to merit comment. Certainly, the brightest and most brilliantly-composed prose formatted into an unparseable wall of text is as lamentable as a tidily-formatted bowl of word salad topped with bad-grammar dressing and misspelling croutons. In other words, it was bad at a glance. No deeper inspection needed or merited. I have no idea why you feel hung up on this. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/14 "2017-01-27T22:28:09Z")
> [@gnoitall](#): > > I think the formatting issue is sufficient to merit comment. Certainly, the brightest and most brilliantly-composed prose formatted into an unparseable wall of text is as lamentable as a tidily-formatted bowl of word salad topped with bad-grammar dressing and misspelling croutons. Sorry, you, like **harmonicamoon** , by fixating on a trivial and unremarkable aspect of the spam, have ignored the humor and irony of it. > [@](#): > > In other words, it was bad at a glance. No deeper inspection needed or merited. I have no idea why you feel hung up on this. Because you’ve entirely missed the point of why I posted it. ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/15 "2017-01-27T22:37:00Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > Sorry, you, like **harmonicamoon** , by fixating on a trivial and unremarkable aspect of the spam, have ignored the humor and irony of it. No, I actually read every misbegotten word of it. And chuckled. But **harmonicamoon** ’s point is valid. **Harmonicamoon** said the box full of shit wasn’t worth opening because it was amply covered with shit, and you’re annoyed he didn’t open the box and run his fingers through the shit to truly grok the full depth of the shittiness. Some folks have a lower tolerance for shit. This is not a complex concept. I’ve had my say about this hijack. You’re clearly allowed to be offended by how **harmonicamoon** chose to participate in this discussion, but hijacking your own thread is pretty counterproductive. It’s a great post, and a fabulous example of ironically incompetent spam. Hilarious, and all that. I really did get the point of the OP. The followup discussion, not so much. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/16 "2017-01-27T22:51:48Z")
> [@gnoitall](#): > > No, I actually read every misbegotten word of it. And chuckled. But **harmonicamoon** ’s point is valid. **Harmonicamoon** said the box full of shit wasn’t worth opening because it was amply covered with shit, and you’re annoyed he didn’t open the box and run his fingers through the shit to truly grok the full depth of the shittiness. Some folks have a lower tolerance for shit. This is not a complex concept. He actually had no idea what was in the box. And no, the paragraph isn’t really all that long, certainly not long enough to make it impossible to read. That’s an absurd exaggeration. He decided not to read it for a trivial reason. > [@](#): > > I’ve had my say about this hijack. You’re clearly allowed to be offended by how **harmonicamoon** chose to participate in this discussion, but hijacking your own thread is pretty counterproductive. You’ve actually been the one to hijack it, but thanks for bumping it repeatedly. 🙂 > [@](#): > > It’s a great post, and a fabulous example of ironically incompetent spam. Hilarious, and all that. I really did get the point of the OP. The followup discussion, not so much. Then why did you decide to engage in that discussion?:dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-spam-evar/778281/17 "2017-01-27T22:57:54Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > He actually had no idea what was in the box. And no, the paragraph isn’t really all that long, certainly not long enough to make it impossible to read. That’s an absurd exaggeration. He decided not to read it for a trivial reason. > > You’ve actually been the one to hijack it, but thanks for bumping it repeatedly. 🙂 > > Then why did you decide to engage in that discussion?:dubious: Slow Trump news day?