# Best thread hijack lines that don't involve race, religion or sex **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 28, 2013, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362 "2013-08-28T02:11:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![deltasigma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e5b9ba/32.png) [@deltasigma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deltasigma)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/1 "2013-08-28T02:11:19Z")
OK. So you’re on some other forum (obviously), probably as a sock puppet (since that’s how you roll) and you’re in a thread that just become one huge circle jerk. You figure that things can’t really get any worse and if you jack the thread (as in hijack, not the other kind 🆒) that it can only help. How do you do it? ---
**Author:** ![Wargamer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/df705f/32.png) [@Wargamer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wargamer)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/2 "2013-08-28T15:37:10Z")
Moar kitteh pictures!!!One!! ---
**Author:** ![Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/4bbf92/32.png) [@Heart\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heart_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/3 "2013-08-28T16:21:38Z")
Pick a random post and respond: “Given your stance on [vaccinations/autism/alternative medicine/breastfeeding/tipping/declawing/home births/Obamacare/moon landing conspiracies/circumcision/twerking/etc.], it figures you’d say something like this.” Done. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/4 "2013-08-28T16:22:36Z")
Puns. Everything’s better with puns. I’d monterey jack that thread with puns. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/5 "2013-08-28T19:49:49Z")
Toss in some random WC Fields quotes or a few Jack Handey _Deep Thoughts_ as if they are on topic and then bark loudly when that is questioned. ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/6 "2013-08-28T20:13:27Z")
The best hijacks are utterly (and deliberately) absurd. My all time favorite (one that came in a thread devoted to Abraham Lincoln): “I like cake.” ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/7 "2013-08-28T20:15:56Z")
I’ll have some taquitos. ---
**Author:** ![lost4life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c4cdca/32.png) [@lost4life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lost4life)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/8 "2013-08-28T20:25:37Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > The best hijacks are utterly (and deliberately) absurd. > > My all time favorite (one that came in a thread devoted to Abraham Lincoln): “I like cake.” My cat’s breath smells like cat food. ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Godot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buck_godot/32/6573_2.png) [@Buck\_Godot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Godot)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/9 "2013-08-28T20:42:24Z")
Disagree with some fact that was posted tangential to the topicd to the topic, then defend your disagreement to the death > [@lost4life](#): > > My cat’s breath smells like cat food. No it doesn’t! ---
**Author:** ![deltasigma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e5b9ba/32.png) [@deltasigma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deltasigma)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/10 "2013-08-28T20:45:58Z")
Can someone tell me where the bathroom is? ---
**Author:** ![deltasigma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e5b9ba/32.png) [@deltasigma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deltasigma)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/11 "2013-08-28T20:51:04Z")
Cats look at nothing . . . but see _everything_. ---
**Author:** ![want2befree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/3e96dc/32.png) [@want2befree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/want2befree)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/12 "2013-08-28T20:53:09Z")
Well enough about me, what do you think about me? ---
**Author:** ![BrassyPhrase](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea666f/32.png) [@BrassyPhrase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrassyPhrase)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/13 "2013-08-28T20:57:54Z")
How bout dem Bears. Ohh Dammmn good this year ---
**Author:** ![the\_diego](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@the\_diego](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_diego)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/14 "2013-08-28T23:47:11Z")
“I’ll have to ask for a cite.” ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2013, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/15 "2013-08-28T23:48:40Z")
I find your point of view fascinating and would like to subscribe to your newsletter. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/16 "2013-08-29T00:16:55Z")
Point out how stupid _Breaking Bad_ is. Uproar ensues. Thread successfully Jacked. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2013, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/17 "2013-08-30T18:05:55Z")
I hijacked your mom. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2013, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/18 "2013-08-31T15:44:59Z")
The only one I ever really try is referring back to the original subject, trying to hijack the thread back to its original purpose. Otherwise, I just let them have their fun. And while it’s not an intentional hijack, I find that earnestly defending someone in a pileon will often work. Usually the person being piled on has gone away, so, since I’m defending them, I become a much easier target. ---
**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2013, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/19 "2013-08-31T21:20:22Z")
Two guys were going off on each other in a topic-specific message board (guitar geekery, fwiw). I just basically posted “jeez, what is this: a snarky Rom-Com meet cute? Too bad neither of you looks like Sandra Bullock; either way, get a room.” One of the guys teed off on me via PM; the admins shut down the thread based on the behavior of the two guys. The guy who teed off on me may get banned; still pending. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2013, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362/20 "2013-08-31T22:18:30Z")
Monty Python references. Particularly, if there’s a pointless argument taking place, “No, it’s quite simple, really. _You_ stay here and make sure _he_ doesn’t leavel” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-thread-hijack-lines-that-dont-involve-race-religion-or-sex/667362.md?page=2)