# Best threat in movies / TV **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 31, 2008, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361 "2008-07-31T14:57:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ArrMatey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrmatey/32/3522_2.png) [@ArrMatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArrMatey)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2008, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/1 "2008-07-31T14:57:27Z")
Inspired by other ‘best of’ threats. I’ll admit, this isn’t the best, but it’s the one that springs to mind immediately. In ‘Sharpe’s Eagle’, a ‘gentleman’ officer wants to challenge Sharpe to a duel. One of the other men says something to the effect of: > [@](#): > > Maj. Hogan: Oh, give me your hand, sir! You’re a brave fellow, Gibbons! Sharpe’s a killer! Killed three French cavalrymen and saved Wellesley’s life - three seconds, slash, cut thrust! And that was when he was still a sergeant. Shall we say six o’clock tomorrow morning, in the field behind the camp? Or should we say it was damn dark, and you made a damn bad mistake? > Gibbons: Silly mistake. Say no more about it, eh? > Maj. Hogan: Good thinking, Gibbons. Sharpe would have shot out your left eye at a minute past six, and you’d have spent all day tomorrow looking up at nothing with the other. It’s the none-too-subtle implied threat that makes it, and the way Gibbons backpedals that makes it so satisfying. ---
**Author:** ![mbh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2008, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/2 "2008-08-02T14:07:12Z")
Dirty Harry > [@](#): > > I know what you’re thinking. “Did he fire six shots or only five?” Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you’ve got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk? In another movie, Dirty Harry tells a crook to behave. The crook says something to the effect of “Who’s going to make me?” Harry replies, “Just me and Smith . . . and Wesson.” In an episode of Babylon Five, DeLenn tells an EarthForce ship, “The only human ever to defeat a Minbari in combat, is behind me. You are in front of me. If you wish to live, be elsewhere.” In another episode, Londo tells Refa to stop dealing with Morden. Refa asks why. “Because I have asked you to. Because you value the good of our people above your own personal ambition. And because I have poisoned your drink.” ---
**Author:** ![bubastis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d07c76/32.png) [@bubastis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bubastis)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2008, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/3 "2008-08-02T20:15:34Z")
It’s not from movies or TV, but a teacher I had in primary schooll, when I was about 6 or 7, would hold her fist to our faces and ask “Do You Smell Dead Men?” ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2008, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/4 "2008-08-02T22:41:52Z")
**Support Your Local Sheriff** Sheriff McCollough (James Garner) wants to arrest Joe Danby (Bruce Dern) for murder. Trouble is, the bars haven’t arrived for the jail cells. McCollough finds some red paint and carefully drips in on the floor, the brings back Danby and puts him in the unfinished cell. There is a line drawn in chalk where the bars should be and McCollough tells Danby that he just has to stay behind the chalk line. > [@](#): > > Joe Danby: You expect me to sit here in this lousy cell on that… > [notices the red paint drippings on the floor] > Joe Danby: What is that red stuff all over the floor there? > Jason McCullough: Oh, uh… > [waves his boot over the paint] > Jason McCullough: …that’s the poor fella that crossed the line earlier today. ---
**Author:** ![River\_Hippie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/river_hippie/32/26_2.png) [@River\_Hippie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/River_Hippie)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2008, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/5 "2008-08-03T01:24:16Z")
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Private Pyle I’m gonna give you three seconds; exactly three-fucking-seconds to wipe that stupid looking grin off your face or I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull-fuck you! ONE! TWO! THREE! ---
**Author:** ![Full\_Metal\_Lotus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df705f/32.png) [@Full\_Metal\_Lotus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Full_Metal_Lotus)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2008, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/6 "2008-08-03T01:37:14Z")
We used to have a “official” looking sticker on the front door of our house. it read: “This house is protected by a retired gun smith, with bad vision. Please wipe your feet on the mat” never, ever had a problem… FML ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2008, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/7 "2008-08-03T01:58:35Z")
**Daniel Plainview:** One night I’m going to come to inside of your house, wherever you’re sleeping, and I’m going to cut your throat. **Evil deputy from Billy Jack:** Now you listen to me, greaseball. If you ever touch her again, I’m gonna cripple your other leg…and I don’t mean the one you walk on. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2008, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/8 "2008-08-03T01:58:38Z")
Oh crap, because there’s a Major Hogan in the OP’s quote, I can’t get past \*“The next sound you hear will be sleigh bells…coming toward you!” \* ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2008, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/9 "2008-08-03T02:04:44Z")
_Con Air_ might be a very cheesy movie, but Malkovich’s character does have one of my favorite lines of all time. To the pilot of the plane he hijacks: “Say a word about this over the radio, and the next wings you see will belong to the flies buzzing over your rotting corpse.” I love it! ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2008, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/10 "2008-08-03T03:43:07Z")
One of my favorite lines from any movie is from the rather forgettable _Freejack_: > [@Some Guy](#): > > You keep lookin’ at me like that, you’ll see me kill you. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2008, 10:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/11 "2008-08-03T10:43:00Z")
From Mel Gibson’s _Payback_: Bronson (Kris Kristofferson): “Tell me where John is and I’ll finish you quick. I promise you won’t have to find out what your left ball tastes like. But if there’s even a bruise on him, I’ll make this last three weeks. I’ll give you a blood transfusion to keep you alive.” From _Invader Zim_: “…As soon as we destroy Tak, I’m going to _feed your brains to my robot._” [Subverted, somewhat, by the two lines that followed in response.] From _Bend of the River_—which I haven’t actually seen yet, to tell the truth. But Jimmy Stewart had a classic delivery of one I saw in an AMC preview: “You’ll be seeing me. You’ll be seeing me. Everytime you bed down for the night, you’ll look back to the darkness and wonder if I’m there. And some night, I will be. You’ll be seeing me!” TV’s _Firefly_ had one, in particular, that came to mind immediately, but it’d kinda kill the mood of the thread if I posted it. (Fans can probably guess what it was, and who said it. :eek: ) ---
**Author:** ![Cuckoorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Cuckoorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cuckoorex)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2008, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/12 "2008-08-03T13:10:05Z")
From _Trading Places_: Beeks: “Back off! I’ll rip out your eyes and piss on your brain.” ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2008, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/13 "2008-08-03T14:03:36Z")
_Commando_: “You’re a funny man, Sully, I like you. That’s why I’m going to kill you last.” _The Untouchables_ (Al Capone): “I want you to get this fuck where he breathes! I want you to find this nancy-boy Eliot Ness, I want him DEAD! I want his family DEAD! I want his house burned to the ground! I wanna go there in the middle of the night and piss on his ashes!” ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2008, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/14 "2008-08-03T22:59:14Z")
This is from a game, not a movie, but anyway. In response to someone who is blackmailing a doctor: “What if someone needs medical attention? What if _you_ need medical attention?” ---
**Author:** ![River\_Hippie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/river_hippie/32/26_2.png) [@River\_Hippie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/River_Hippie)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2008, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/15 "2008-08-04T01:13:28Z")
From “The Crying Game”, paraphrased, more or less: “Have you ever tried to pick up your teeth with broken fingers?” ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2008, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/16 "2008-08-04T01:16:25Z")
From an otherwise crappy David Arquette movie: Hero: Was that a threat? Villain: Oh, when I threaten you, you’ll know it. Hero (genuinely confused): Now, was _that_ a threat? ---
**Author:** ![gallows\_fodder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8c91f0/32.png) [@gallows\_fodder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gallows_fodder)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2008, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/17 "2008-08-04T01:42:05Z")
From Battlestar Galactica’s “Acts of Contrition”: > [@](#): > > Adama: You did it because you were engaged. > Starbuck: (welling up) Because I made a mistake. Because I was- I was so in love with him and… and I let that get in the way of doing my job. And, um, he, um- he just wanted it so much and I- I didn’t want to be the one who crushed him. (in tears) > Adama: (cold) Reinstate the trainees to flight status. > Starbuck: I will, I, uh… but I just want you to understand that I- > Adama: Do your job. > Starbuck: Yes, sir. > Adama:\*\* And walk out of this cabin while you still can.\*\* …delivered with trademark bone-chilling death glare. ---
**Author:** ![MaxTheVool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@MaxTheVool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaxTheVool)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2008, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/18 "2008-08-04T01:42:55Z")
The whole “To the pain” monologue from **The Princess Bride**. ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2008, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/19 "2008-08-04T02:09:21Z")
From Tombstone: > [@](#): > > All right, Clanton… you called down the thunder, well now you’ve got it! You see that? _opens his coat revealing a badge_ It says United States Marshal! Take a good look at him, Ike… ‘cause that’s how you’re gonna end up! The Cowboys are finished, you understand? I see a red sash, I kill the man wearin’ it! So run, you curr… RUN! Tell all the other currs the law’s comin’! You tell 'em I’M coming… and hell’s coming with me, you hear?.. Hell’s coming with me! ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2008, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361/20 "2008-08-04T02:11:53Z")
[QUOTE=River Hippie] “Have you ever tried to pick up your teeth with broken fingers?” [/QUOTE] Reminds me of this one from _The Blues Brothers_: > [@Tucker McElroy](#): > > You’re gonna look pretty funny tryin’ to eat corn on the cob with no fuckin’ teeth! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-threat-in-movies-tv/458361.md?page=2)