# Best way to deal with lunch thieves? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 12, 2016, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048 "2016-04-12T22:56:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![CoastalMaineiac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@CoastalMaineiac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CoastalMaineiac)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2016, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/1 "2016-04-12T22:56:02Z")
Well, we’ve had a rash of lunch thefts at work these past few weeks. There isn’t much that ranks lower, in my opinion, than stealing someone’s lunch. I haven’t been hit yet, but I’ve been pondering the idea of booby traps. What could I do that would be on the safe side of the law? I’m assuming ghost pepper and ex-lax brownies are out of the question (even though I think the burning shits is the most perfect form of justice in this instance). I figure the same holds true for a tuna and MeowMix sandwich. So what’s the best way to deal with the situation? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2016, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/2 "2016-04-12T23:06:00Z")
Why would a tuna and Meow-Mix sandwich be out of the question? Or at least, something that’s really gross like that? It’s not designed to make someone sick, just to be really, really gross. How about tuna, peanut butter, onions, Swiss cheese and strawberry jelly? It’s disgusting, but not something that’ll hurt someone. ---
**Author:** ![picker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/picker/32/13969_2.png) [@picker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picker)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2016, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/3 "2016-04-12T23:12:03Z")
Make something really delicious, and load the center of it with food coloring. Something really obvious, like blue or green. It’s pretty unlikely they’ll take a bite without getting some on their face. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2016, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/4 "2016-04-12T23:12:12Z")
Actually, if you’re in the habit of eating extremely hot peppers, that’s perfectly legitimate. You put on the sandwich what _you_ wanted. ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2016, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/5 "2016-04-12T23:37:46Z")
> [@CoastalMaineiac](#): > > I figure the same holds true for a tuna and MeowMix sandwich. [Says who?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=531025) ---
**Author:** ![drewder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/57b2e6/32.png) [@drewder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewder)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2016, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/6 "2016-04-12T23:46:37Z")
> [@CoastalMaineiac](#): > > Well, we’ve had a rash of lunch thefts at work these past few weeks. There isn’t much that ranks lower, in my opinion, than stealing someone’s lunch. > > I haven’t been hit yet, but I’ve been pondering the idea of booby traps. > > What could I do that would be on the safe side of the law? I’m assuming ghost pepper and ex-lax brownies are out of the question (even though I think the burning shits is the most perfect form of justice in this instance). I figure the same holds true for a tuna and MeowMix sandwich. > > So what’s the best way to deal with the situation? Sounds like you’re not committed to the plan if hot peppers are off the menu. I suppose you could coat you lunch bag with phosphorescent paint and go around with a black light. ---
**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/7 "2016-04-13T00:08:32Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Why would a tuna and Meow-Mix sandwich be out of the question? Or at least, something that’s really gross like that? It’s not designed to make someone sick, just to be really, really gross. How about tuna, peanut butter, onions, Swiss cheese and strawberry jelly? It’s disgusting, but not something that’ll hurt someone. Guessing that would be unappealing before it ever made it into the culprit’s mouth. Seems to me that you want something they’ll bite into. I think **picker** ’s idea is the best - creative use of food colouring. ---
**Author:** ![boytyperanma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4491bb/32.png) [@boytyperanma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boytyperanma)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/8 "2016-04-13T00:14:03Z")
Camera’s solve these problems far more effectively then booby trapping food. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/9 "2016-04-13T00:14:32Z")
Once I am home I will do some digging for a link but they make anti-theft powders that you would scatter inside your lunch bag they stick to everything kind of like talcum powder but when they contact the skin they stain skin very obviously. We used it on employee theft bait a few times with immense success. ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/10 "2016-04-13T00:34:55Z")
I like lunch meat sandwiches laced with hot horseradish. Not everyone likes this. Actually a CCTV pointed at the fridge might do it. ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/11 "2016-04-13T00:37:12Z")
exploding dye pack like banks use. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/12 "2016-04-13T00:58:53Z")
It blows me away that this is an issue. Management should send an inter-office email “Lunch thieves will be fired and possibly charged with theft.” You really don’t want folks like that around. ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/13 "2016-04-13T01:37:29Z")
> [@CoastalMaineiac](#): > > Well, we’ve had a rash of lunch thefts at work these past few weeks. There isn’t much that ranks lower, in my opinion, than stealing someone’s lunch. > > I haven’t been hit yet, but I’ve been pondering the idea of booby traps. > > What could I do that would be on the safe side of the law? I’m assuming ghost pepper and ex-lax brownies are out of the question (even though I think the burning shits is the most perfect form of justice in this instance). I figure the same holds true for a tuna and MeowMix sandwich. > > So what’s the best way to deal with the situation? I disagree. What’s illegal about putting ghost peppers and ex lax in YOUR lunch? ---
**Author:** ![boytyperanma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4491bb/32.png) [@boytyperanma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boytyperanma)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/14 "2016-04-13T02:01:03Z")
> [@Ranger\_Jeff](#): > > I disagree. What’s illegal about putting ghost peppers and ex lax in YOUR lunch? Laws are often about intent. If you regularly consume ghost pepper and ex-lax sandwiches you’d have a rather good defense. If you are like most people and do not, you’d have a rather difficult time trying to prove your intent wasn’t to poison someone. ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/15 "2016-04-13T02:52:31Z")
I’ve considered bait soft drinks, preferably something dark, with a nice load of food coloring. Non-toxic, so I can’t get in trouble with management, definite evidence to shame the thief. ---
**Author:** ![pohjonen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pohjonen/32/423_2.png) [@pohjonen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pohjonen)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/16 "2016-04-13T02:53:31Z")
Take a bite out of your sandwich before you put it into the fridge. ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/17 "2016-04-13T02:56:05Z")
In addition to the bite, hang a post-it note on your lunch saying “I have the deadly HerpEbolAidSyphillis” ---
**Author:** ![drewder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/57b2e6/32.png) [@drewder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewder)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/18 "2016-04-13T02:59:56Z")
> [@boytyperanma](#): > > Laws are often about intent. If you regularly consume ghost pepper and ex-lax sandwiches you’d have a rather good defense. If you are like most people and do not, you’d have a rather difficult time trying to prove your intent wasn’t to poison someone. That might be true if you used undercooked chicken, the other stuff is food grade. ---
**Author:** ![SacFly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9fc348/32.png) [@SacFly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SacFly)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/19 "2016-04-13T05:08:26Z")
Forget the ex - lax. Ghost pepper powder is probably 20 times stronger than normal chili powder. Mix it with the mayo and put it on a sandwich. Some people actually do this by choice. Anyone else will be down for the count. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2016, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048/20 "2016-04-13T12:14:03Z")
Every time we have one of these threads, it seems people show up claiming that if you put something even slightly spicy in your food to deter the thieves you’ll wind up charged with attempted murder. Anyway, you can try one of these [fake moldy sandwich bags](http://www.perpetualkid.com/theft-deterrent-moldy-sandwich-bags.html). [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-deal-with-lunch-thieves/752048.md?page=2)