# Best way to decline an invitation to a play **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 11, 2010, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401 "2010-09-11T13:30:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/1 "2010-09-11T13:30:22Z")
A good friend of mine has a friend who’s an actress. Said friend has tickets to a play said actress is appearing in tonight. The friend has tickets and was supposed to take a date, who’s now sick, so he offered the other ticket to me. When he had mentioned this play the other day I muttered vague mutterings about possibly seeing a movie with another friend, which wasn’t exactly true but wasn’t exactly a lie. Movie plans have not developed. The description: > [@](#): > > Waiting rooms stink. Unless you’re in Green Light’s _Waiting Room_, waiting to explore the feminine principles that nurture the world. Join us and be part of the most exciting ensemble of women artists in Philly. We promise that you’ve never been in a waiting room like ours. Frankly, I want to keep it that way – this sounds like pretentious claptrap by amateur actors to me, and I’m not generally a fan of the theater anyway. So if I went I’d be fidgeting for 75 minutes and then have to be tactful to both my friend and the actress afterward. I can’t really use my preferred “sorry, made other plans” excuse, which works best when you don’t need to specify what the plans are, but the next time I’d see this friend he’d ask what movie I saw and what I thought. My plans actually consist of staying home with my knitting and a Netflix DVD I’ve had for almost a month. Ugh. I don’t want to insult both him and his friend by saying “It sounds utterly hellish,” but other than the truth I don’t know what to say. Maybe just “Lot going on mentally with this new job, I’d rather stay home and veg.” That works. Thanks for your help – (yeah, like I’m not going to post this after spending 10 minutes writing it … ) ---
**Author:** ![leander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bcef8e/32.png) [@leander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leander)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/2 "2010-09-11T13:37:00Z")
Honestly, I think the best thing to do is PM a mod about this. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/3 "2010-09-11T13:39:00Z")
> [@leander](#): > > Honestly, I think the best thing to do is PM a mod about this. 😉 :smack: ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/4 "2010-09-11T13:41:12Z")
[mod tiara on] Moved ATMB --\> MPSIMS. [mod tiara off] ---
**Author:** ![Turek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/turek/32/18782_2.png) [@Turek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Turek)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/5 "2010-09-11T13:48:04Z")
Now, if you’ll just answer your own question, it’ll be the trifecta: Asked, moved, and answered, all by the same mod! 😛 I guess you could warn yourself, too, but that’d just be silly. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/6 "2010-09-11T14:01:28Z")
“I’m sorry, but this just doesn’t sound like my cup of tea. I hope you have fun, though!” ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/7 "2010-09-11T14:10:12Z")
Can’t come to play … knitting emergency … send yarn ---
**Author:** ![Fried\_Dough\_Ho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a88e57/32.png) [@Fried\_Dough\_Ho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fried_Dough_Ho)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/8 "2010-09-11T14:16:05Z")
75 minutes out of your life to support a friend would kill you? Glad you aren’t my friend… ---
**Author:** ![Electric\_Warrior](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Electric\_Warrior](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Electric_Warrior)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/9 "2010-09-11T14:17:49Z")
> [@Fried\_Dough\_Ho](#): > > 75 minutes out of your life to support a friend would kill you? > > Glad you aren’t my friend… Read again, it’s a friend _of_ a friend - the OP doesn’t know the actress. I would say something like **MsWhatsit** ’s post. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/10 "2010-09-11T14:26:15Z")
> [@Fried\_Dough\_Ho](#): > > 75 minutes out of your life to support a friend would kill you? > > Glad you aren’t my friend… Yes, it would literally kill her. Otherwise of course she would go, because the only reason to not go to every single thing that a friend or a friend-of-a-friend invites you to is if going would actually cause your death. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/11 "2010-09-11T14:28:33Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > Can’t come to play … knitting emergency … send yarn He’s been in my house – he knows that lack of yarn is not the problem, keeping the stash under control is. 😉 Yeah, I went with: > [@](#): > > Sorry, sweetie – I’m on total sensory overload with the new job, and I really need to hermitize tonight with the cats, my knitting, and a DVD. Hope you can find someone else. Thanks for letting me think aloud, y’all. ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/12 "2010-09-11T14:33:01Z")
From _the George Burns And Gracie Allen Show_ (radio) > [@](#): > > George) C’mon Gracie go out with me > Gracie) I’m sorry George, I’m planning on having a headache that night …and now back to your regularly scheduled thread ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21825_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/13 "2010-09-11T15:04:36Z")
I’m sorry. The voices said I need to stay home tonight. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/14 "2010-09-11T15:25:50Z")
“I think I may be coming down with Hepatitis…” Edit: Oh, wait. I see the friend’s date is already “sick” and can’t go. ---
**Author:** ![Silvorange](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8dc957/32.png) [@Silvorange](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silvorange)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/15 "2010-09-11T15:28:59Z")
You don’t have to explain. Just say,“I’m sorry, but I can’t.” Miss Manners will back you up. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/16 "2010-09-11T16:05:51Z")
Tell him your guild is raiding ICC tonight, and you’re the main tank. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/17 "2010-09-11T17:26:25Z")
Heard back from my friend – he seems to be taking my decision in stride. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/18 "2010-09-11T17:30:33Z")
“Sorry, I’m having a dialog with my vagina tonight.” (I went to see the Vagina Monologues in Dublin. It was one of the most cringeworthy things I’ve ever experienced. The audience was so embarrassingly PC and right-on that one woman got a spontaneous round of applause as she walked on stage - just for being black.) ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/19 "2010-09-11T19:13:40Z")
Do you think you’ll get less out of it than he will? I feel sorry for the poor guy. Can’t you two just both get a good laugh out of it? Or both skip it and see a movie together? ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401/20 "2010-09-11T20:15:22Z")
Oooh, that sounds absolutely awful. “I’m sorry, but I can’t go.” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-way-to-decline-an-invitation-to-a-play/553401.md?page=2)