# Best weapon to use against Vampires? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 12, 2005, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335 "2005-09-12T21:37:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/21 "2005-09-13T04:39:42Z")
You might check out [The SDMB Anti-Vampire Weapon Development Guild](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=266720) and [How would you go after a vampire?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=4688030) No kiddin’—some good stuff in those. Recently, I’ve been musing over the possibilities of using [photoflash bombs](http://www.harringtonmuseum.org.uk/M46Photoflash.htm) as an anti-vampire weapon. Of course, experiments would be needed to determine if a 500,000,000 candlepower flash alone would be enough to harm a vampire, or if you’d need to somehow shift the light into the Ultraviolet spectrum to do the trick. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/22 "2005-09-13T12:37:24Z")
Photographic materials use Silver as a component. Processing film/paper produces a nasty black fluid, that contains lots of Silver in suspension. Spray the stuff. From backpack sprayers, & crop dusters. Spray every graveyard & crypt in town, need it or not, just like spraying for roaches. Also, take collodial Silver suppliments, thus making your blood toxic to the Undead. ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/23 "2005-09-13T13:02:46Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#): > > Also, take collodial Silver suppliments, thus making your blood toxic to the Undead. n My plan was to eat a shit ton of garlic, making my blood taste ass-nasty. Also, I want to surically imbed a small splinter of wood in my heart,. The second I turn into a vamp, BANM, I’m dead. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/24 "2005-09-13T13:10:44Z")
In a TORG game I was playing in, my highly pious PC’s Test of Will scored high enough to cause a _hideously_ powerful vampire to take just one backwards step… right into the Ark of the Covenant. Whereupon I hid behind something solid and did. not. even. _think._ of watching what happened next. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/25 "2005-09-13T13:48:55Z")
When did silver become a weapon against vampires? I thought that was for werewolves. ---
**Author:** ![Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f08c70/32.png) [@Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crowbar_of_Irony_3)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/26 "2005-09-13T13:57:00Z")
Holy hand grenade. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/27 "2005-09-13T15:16:10Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > When did silver become a weapon against vampires? Yeah, I was going to ask that, too. It’s important to keep this stuff straight. ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/28 "2005-09-13T15:19:17Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > When did silver become a weapon against vampires? I thought that was for werewolves. Many myths/stories/legends/made up stuff in random TV/books/movies have silver as being useful against vamps. Silver is often thought of as a pure metal in folklore, so it would make sense that it could hurt something as perverted as a vampire, or werewolf. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/29 "2005-09-13T15:33:58Z")
Well, to go with an SF version, how’s about a garlic needler? The standard needler of SF fame takes a lump of metal and kicks shards off of it to be accellerated at insane speeds to put itsy-bitsy, but lethal, holes in the target. If one cools anything far enough - it becomes brittle enough that even a non-metal could be made to make shards that would be hard enough to punch through un-living matter. So… I envision a device one puts a bulb of elephant garlic into, which then freezes the garlic to, say, 100 K, and when the trigger is pressed shoots out slivers of that at the target. I leave the design of the refrigeration and accelleration units (and the miniaturization of such) to more literal minded geeks than I. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/30 "2005-09-13T15:51:20Z")
You fellas have given me a nasty idea… How would Friend Computer and the loyal Troubleshooters deal with a vampire in the RPG Paranoia? Wood is a product of Outside, the details of which are not available at your clearance level, Citizen. I’d go with tacnuke shells. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/31 "2005-09-13T15:58:13Z")
A big crucifix tattoo on the chest and a bear hug. From the John Steakly book Vampire$; the blessing of the Pope. There’s a cute scene where a vampire tries to kill the “sleeping” Pope - who reaches up, touches him on the forehead and says “Bless you, my son”. Fwoosh ! The vampire goes up in flames. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/32 "2005-09-13T16:22:55Z")
> [@OtakuLoki](#): > > a bulb of elephant garlic into, . [From here](http://www.garlic-central.com/elephant-garlic.html) > [@](#): > > Elephant garlic - allium ampeloprasum - is probably more closely related to the leek than ordinary garlic. > > In terms of flavour, elephant garlic is to garlic what leeks are to onions. It is much less intense and sweeter. It has been described - rather unkindly - as “garlic for people who don’t like garlic”. You might want to be sure it will work first. This is serious stuff. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/33 "2005-09-13T17:00:13Z")
Very important point, **carnivorousplant**. I’ll have to find some [del]suckers[/del] I mean volunteers to test the efficacy of elephant garlic for me, first. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/34 "2005-09-13T17:10:22Z")
> [@Scuba\_Ben](#): > > You fellas have given me a nasty idea… How would Friend Computer and the loyal Troubleshooters deal with a vampire in the RPG Paranoia? Wood is a product of Outside, the details of which are not available at your clearance level, Citizen. > > I’d go with tacnuke shells. For that matter, holy water is a product of a secret society. (Or several of them) Not precisely something you’d want to risk trying to acquire. And do not let Friend Computer even get a whiff that one might want something other than good, pure Computer-recycled water. That might indicate anti-social, or even _Commie_ tendencies. Perhaps you should come and spend a few time units explaining why you’re not satisfied with Friend Computer’s water, Citizen. Garlic, and other spices, is not used in proper footvat yeast. As such it could also be only found Outside. Further information is not available at your clearance level, Citizen. For that matter, just how did you come to know of the existence of such items, Citizen? Silver is known, but used only in vital, Computer-related equipment. Not to be entrusted to mere Troubleshooters, don’chaknow. After all, we can always get more Troubleshooters, but if something were to happen to Friend Computer… Why it would be utter chaos! Did you say something, citizen? Good. I thought not. Go on your way. Oh, and don’t worry, The Computer is sure there’s no such thing as vampires. And we both know you wouldn’t want to _doubt_ Friend Computer. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/35 "2005-09-13T18:57:12Z")
> [@Der Trihs](#): > > A big crucifix tattoo on the chest and a bear hug. > > From the John Steakly book Vampire$; the blessing of the Pope. There’s a cute scene where a vampire tries to kill the “sleeping” Pope - who reaches up, touches him on the forehead and says “Bless you, my son”. Fwoosh ! The vampire goes up in flames. “Ha ha ha…but you have to have faith for that to work, Mr Vincent!” ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/36 "2005-09-13T19:12:10Z")
> [@GargoyleWB](#): > > “Ha ha ha…but you have to have faith for that to work, Mr Vincent!” That’s why we Nice Jewish Boys carry a BFG. ;j ---
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2005, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/37 "2005-09-13T23:51:15Z")
> [@bouv](#): > > Also, I want to surically imbed a small splinter of wood in my heart,. The second I turn into a vamp, BANM, I’m dead. You probably wouldn’t even have to wait for it. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2005, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/38 "2005-09-14T00:31:40Z")
> [@bouv](#): > > The second I turn into a vamp, BANM, I’m dead. Okay, they are, after all, like, called “the living dead.” It would be a real bummer to be a vampire. Imortality after a fashion. Wealth accruded over time. Women. Even a creep like Bela Lugosi had them crawling all over him. And not being able to use the drive through. Yeah, it would suck. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Max\_the\_Immortal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Max\_the\_Immortal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_the_Immortal)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2005, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/39 "2005-09-14T04:07:11Z")
It just occurred to me: Why don’t vampire hunters douse themselves with holy water before going into battle? ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2005, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335/40 "2005-09-14T04:16:06Z")
Well, I think, in part it would depend upon the beliefs of the hunter. I mean, **why** would a dyed-in-the-wool athiest think saying mumbo-jumbo over water would help? Or would the Calvinist hunter really want to risk damnation by using the tools of the Papacy? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/best-weapon-to-use-against-vampires/321335.md?page=3)