# Beware the mini-Rants of March (4th or otherwise) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 1, 2012, 8:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431 "2012-03-01T08:33:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 18
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2012, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/341 "2012-03-26T21:42:56Z")
> [@StrawberryDaquiri](#): > > 11 months I’ve had you. You have sent me into a crippling depression, taken away my favorite drinks, given me insomnia from the pain at night, made me sleep with an ass pillow, maintain a forced stoic expression in public, embarassed me in front of my family, friends, and doctors, cost me numerous dollars spent to kill you, dried out my skin from the baths I take to shrink you, and now, 11 fucking months later you still are not gone. FUCK YOU hemorrhoid. I am 20. I do not need this shit in my life! Fuck it!!! > > On the bright side, har har hemorrhoid, it was [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/archive/index.php/t-308731.html](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/archive/index.php/t-308731.html) > this link that brought me to the straight dope board 11 months ago. And I thank you all for giving me something to laugh at and take my mind off of my own damn problems. Glad we can amuse you, at least. Sorry to hear of your ass-related woes. ---
**Author:** ![chizzuk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@chizzuk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chizzuk)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2012, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/342 "2012-03-26T22:25:38Z")
I went to the doctor this afternoon for a rapid strep test. I was pretty sure it was a cold, since I have a cough and intermittent stuffy nose, but my throat was pretty sore and looked red and it’s been going around recently. But I felt like a huge weenie. Weenies go to the doctor for colds. Well, the strep test was positive. So on the plus side, I am not a weenie. On the other hand, I have strep throat. Great start to the week! Did I mention I take comprehensive exams on Friday? ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/343 "2012-03-27T02:04:49Z")
> [@Mister\_Rik](#): > > I pit my unidentified, Prius-driving neighbor… Our pastor calls them \*“Toyota Pious”\*es. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/344 "2012-03-27T03:07:31Z")
> [@digs](#): > > Our pastor calls them \*“Toyota Pious”\*es. That’s pretty good. That’s right up there with the “GMC Denial” and GMC’s “Penis Envoy.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/345 "2012-03-27T14:59:49Z")
Rant the first: \ I spent _two fucking hours_ waiting to see the fucking podiatrist yesterday for a steroid injection and today I’m apparently having some sort of reaction where my foot huuuuuurts. Like, worse than before can’t walk right hurts. So: fuck. Rant the second: Hey, coworker who dropped out of your first year of community college because it was “really hard” - you are _stupid_. Maybe I am being elitist in saying, in front of you (not to you) that I can’t wait until I can take in-person graduate level classes and, you know, spend time with educated people again. Part of what led me to say that? Was you asking me when King Arthur reigned. Not what time period the stories are about, not when T.H. White wrote the stories. You asked when he reigned because you had no idea that King Arthur has roughly as much historical basis as Godzilla. You are just a _dumb_ person and I weep for our nation which produces people like you; and don’t even get me started on how much I loathe spending all day every day with _fucking morons_ like you. > [@chizzuk](#): > > I went to the doctor this afternoon for a rapid strep test. I was pretty sure it was a cold, since I have a cough and intermittent stuffy nose, but my throat was pretty sore and looked red and it’s been going around recently. But I felt like a huge weenie. Weenies go to the doctor for colds. > > Well, the strep test was positive. So on the plus side, I am not a weenie. On the other hand, I have strep throat. Great start to the week! Did I mention I take comprehensive exams on Friday? Upside: If it’s strep you should be feeling considerably better by Friday. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/346 "2012-03-27T17:25:08Z")
[Take it here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=644820), **NinjaChick.** ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/347 "2012-03-27T18:24:25Z")
How the fuck did I break a nail _going to pee_? Note to self: ur doing it wrong. - doubles up on biotin supplements, which I’ve been slacking off on taking lately \* ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/348 "2012-03-27T20:47:55Z")
> [@Moonlitherial](#): > > Wednesday the dealership and the insurance company chat with each other and then hopefully fix they car and all is good. I was so hopeful then. Such an innocent time. The dealership called. They’ll look at the car tomorrow with the insurance agent and quote and order the parts but… they’re being flown in from Germany so this is not going to be fixed for a couple of weeks. They have promised it will be better than the tires we ordered in September which apparently took a slow boat and arrived last week. I am officially recinding any recommendation to purchase a SMART. It might be cute and fun to drive but the headaches are rapidly becoming not worth it. ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/349 "2012-03-27T21:17:51Z")
> [@NinjaChick](#): > > Part of what led me to say that? Was you asking me when King Arthur reigned. That made me laugh far too much. Thanks, I needed that. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/350 "2012-03-27T22:10:19Z")
> [@NinjaChick](#): > > Part of what led me to say that? Was you asking me when King Arthur reigned. Because you wrote “led” to denote the past tense form of the verb “to lead,” and did not substitute the homophone “lead,” which only takes that pronunciation when referring to Element 82, I am recommending you for immediate promotion to Brigadier General. Congratulations. Use your powers only for good. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/351 "2012-03-28T02:12:17Z")
My deadbeat brother-in-law is getting evicted on Friday. He wants to move into our RV, which is currently in our yard. He’s wanted to move in with us before, but so far we’ve always been able to put him off. We have a vacant house, but he doesn’t want to live there. I suspect that what he wants is actually access to a full refrigerator…and to my jewelry box. We’ve had him feed our cats while we had to go out of town, and afterwards, some of my good jewelry just wasn’t in my jewelry box. I don’t have a LOT of good jewelry, but a couple of pieces were from my Grandma Bodoni. So no. He doesn’t get to move in the trailer, or into the guest room. He smokes, he drinks, and he uses other substances, and Bill has to get drug tested now and then. Brother-in-law has been milking unemployment, not even looking for a job, for as long as he could. He finally buckled down and took a job when the unemployment ran out. He’s been on other assistance programs, as well. He’ll tell you he’s a libertarian, though, and he wants small government. It’s OK for HIM to get government money, but not anybody else. This is the guy who borrowed a few thousand dollars and some lawn equipment from us to start up a lawn care service in November, and who decided that since people wanted him to actually, you know, mow lawns and do landscaping and generally bust his butt in order to earn the money (instead of sitting back and having his relatives do all the work), he’s just go out of business last spring. Oh, and he was collecting unemployment then, he was just working for cash. Have we seen any of the money paid back? We got some of the equipment back, but he sold some of it, too, and kept the money because he needed it so badly. He’s been borrowing money from my husband since they were both little kids. In the past few years, he’s managed to borrow $20K that he hasn’t paid back. And we don’t expect to see that money ever again. But his credit line has been reached. I told my husband that he can blame me for not wanting this guy in our RV, just to tell him that I’m going through one of my moods again. I’ll be the bad guy. But I DON’T want him wandering in my house. He’s mean to my cats, I am positive that he’s the one who took some of my jewelry, and I just don’t trust him. Plus he’s batshit crazy on some subjects. ---
**Author:** ![thursday\_next](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8797f3/32.png) [@thursday\_next](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thursday_next)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/352 "2012-03-28T03:48:21Z")
**Purplehorseshoe** , I used to have awesome nails naturally. Then health problems and the medicine to fix them made my nails … crappy is too nice a word. 😛 After much work, I have long pretty ones again (now that I’ve typed this they’ll all probably break out of spite). I do the biotin thing (it also gives a shiny coat!) Have you tried [Barielle Nail Strengthener Cream](http://www.sallybeauty.com/nail-strengthener/SBS-117700,default,pd.html)? It’s so awesome. It says to use it 1-3 times a day. I usually apply it three times a day while watching TV and I totally zone out and get very relaxed while doing it. I’m also pretty sure that I now have competitive thumbs for a game of Thumb Wars. As for my rant, tiny airport near my house. You are annoying. The airplanes are getting louder and more frequent. No, nothing is shaking or anything and it’s true that I have super freaky hearing to go with my super sniffer, but still. If one can only mow their law and use other noisy tools between 8:00AM and 8:00PM (I believe) can’t you at least stop having planes fly in after nine at night? Ten at night is really beyond the pale and a new and not exciting experience. It’s almost as much fun as when I was driving on the freeway and one of the small planes was trying to land at your airport and for a few seconds it looked like it going to land on the freeway. Oh sure, it’s funny now, but not then (yet I remained amazingly calm). Finally, Bogie my beloved puppy, I did not make your daddy leave. He is away on business. He will be back soon. Fortunately I have oodles of Benadryl so I can cuddle you as needed. Please stop being mad and me. And body? Bogie is 4 now; my allergy to dogs is TINY, think we could stop with the hives every time he licks me? This doesn’t happen with any other dog. **Lynn** , I have a few relatives like that. Currently one is stalking a nice relative on facebook. It stinks. I remember you mentioning the landscaping business before. I hope he doesn’t cause too much trouble. It’s extra stinky when they steal your jewelry that has special meaning. :mad: **Flatlined** , I’m glad you figured out which kitteh was sick. I was going to ask if you could put them in separate rooms until one … gave themselves up. Then I figured being cats they’d ALL do it out of spite. I think I know my word of the day. Ahh, I feel better. Please help yourself to chocolate, tissues and blunt instruments as needed (as long as the blunt instruments aren’t used against me). 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/353 "2012-03-28T04:01:49Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > He’s been borrowing money from my husband since they were both little kids. In the past few years, he’s managed to borrow $20K that he hasn’t paid back. And we don’t expect to see that money ever again. But his credit line has been reached. I told my husband that he can blame me for not wanting this guy in our RV, just to tell him that I’m going through one of my moods again. I’ll be the bad guy. But I DON’T want him wandering in my house. He’s mean to my cats, I am positive that he’s the one who took some of my jewelry, and I just don’t trust him. Plus he’s batshit crazy on some subjects. Lynn, I can’t possibly understand why you don’t want him staying with you 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/354 "2012-03-28T05:05:53Z")
Obviously, it’s because _I_ am batshit crazy. Or at least that’s the excuse that my husband gave his brother. Bill isn’t happy, but I think that he didn’t want his brother to stay here, either, because it WOULD probably end up with Brother in the guest room on a permanent basis. So I’m the bad guy. I’ll live. This guy’s opinion of me doesn’t really matter to me. I have TRIED being nice to him, but he’s a damned chauvinist pig. You know, I’d be more sympathetic if Brother hadn’t been gaming the unemployment, and had actually been looking for work. Instead, he keeps doing the same shit, and expecting my husband to bail him out again. Guess what? If he’d ever bothered to pay back some of those loans, we might have money to lend him today. But as it is…we don’t have that money, we’ve pretty much given up any hope of being paid back, and if my husband cosigns a loan or a lease, I’m gonna kill him. Or at least beat him up. ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/355 "2012-03-28T07:25:53Z")
I am just amused at the facts that he is a dole bludger, thief, substance abuser and crazy but the deal breaker he is mean to your cats. That I can understand. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/356 "2012-03-28T07:59:29Z")
I firmly believe that if a person treats animals in a mean fashion, that it’s a sign of a mental or emotional problem. If this guy would just IGNORE my cats, I’d be OK with this. But he’s beyond stupid if he thinks that I’m going to forget him being mean to my cats. Or to any cats. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/357 "2012-03-28T11:59:50Z")
> [@Cicero](#): > > I am just amused at the facts that he is a dole bludger, thief, substance abuser and crazy but the deal breaker he is mean to your cats. > > That I can understand. Sounds like Gary. He was getting more and more involved with a woman who was nothing but trouble. Problem was, he immediately forgave the lying, the disappearing for days, the shoplifting, the cheating… but finally she crossed the line. She dented his brand new truck. It was over that same day. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/358 "2012-03-28T15:59:59Z")
> [@](#): > > Last edited by digs; Today at 07:01 AM. Reason: Before anyone asks, YES, cats \> trucks. .. a Maine Coon and a Tonka truck? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Engineer\_Dude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9fc29f/32.png) [@Engineer\_Dude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Engineer_Dude)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/359 "2012-03-28T16:42:12Z")
Is it just me, or are the wings at Buffalo Wild Wings smaller on Wing Tuesdays? ---
**Author:** ![SnakesCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@SnakesCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnakesCatLady)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2012, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431/360 "2012-03-28T18:40:49Z")
My husband’s cousin committed suicide last night. I want to rant but just don’t have the words…or the heart…for it. Damn. Just damn. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431.md?page=17) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/beware-the-mini-rants-of-march-4th-or-otherwise/614431.md?page=19)