# Bickering over a will - who's wrong, and how wrong? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 24, 2016, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600 "2016-10-24T16:12:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2016, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600/41 "2016-10-27T21:14:58Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > Morally, it’s still wrong. If Chuck and Diane will waste the windfall, that’s that. > > Imagine if Bertha said, “Chuck and Diane will waste their inheritance, so I’m donating their share to the Red Cross instead.” Essentially the same principle. If they plan to use the money to further a drug/drinking/gambling addiction, or to invest/donate to some kind of harmful cause, or something along those lines, donating it may lead to the best outcome. There are some problems that money can make worse. ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2016, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600/42 "2016-10-27T21:19:45Z")
And note this is all theoretical. I obviously don’t know these people, and most likely Bertha is completely wrong. But there are situations where adding more money makes things worse. ---
**Author:** ![OleOneEye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/f14d63/32.png) [@OleOneEye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OleOneEye)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2016, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600/43 "2016-10-28T00:19:36Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > And that’s when we learned that the interests of the estate do not always coincide with the interests of the heirs. How - what happened? ---
**Author:** ![cwthree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@cwthree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cwthree)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2016, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600/44 "2016-10-28T00:42:50Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Are there plans to contest this? I can’t imagine they’d lose if they tried. (How old are the grandkids, and how do they feel about it?) Not as far as I know. > [@filmore](#): > > What kind of trust is the money in? I don’t know. Not sure who the trustee is/was. > [@Velocity](#): > > Anyway, the OP should let us know the updates on the situation, unless it’s more or less settled. Well, Ethel died a few weeks ago, so no one is talking to her and vice versa. When she died, she was still estranged from both daughters. Her son was in touch with her, but I don’t know if they ever had a really happy relationship. No idea who has the money or where it is now. ---
**Author:** ![UDS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ecae2f/32.png) [@UDS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UDS)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2016, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600/45 "2016-10-28T00:54:22Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > And note this is all theoretical. I obviously don’t know these people, and most likely Bertha is completely wrong. But there are situations where adding more money makes things worse. That might justify Bertha in declining to act as executor. But it doesn’t justify her in taking someone else’s money, and using it as she thinks they ought to use it. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2016, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600/46 "2016-10-28T12:16:17Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > If they plan to use the money to further a drug/drinking/gambling addiction, or to invest/donate to some kind of harmful cause, or something along those lines, donating it may lead to the best outcome. > > There are some problems that money can make worse. So you’re backpedaling now? Originally you said it would be moral to set up the trust if Bertha thought they would “waste” the inheritance. It must be nice to be so morally superior you feel comfortable judging whether others are wasting their money. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2016, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600/47 "2016-10-28T15:00:59Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > If they plan to use the money to further a drug/drinking/gambling addiction, or to invest/donate to some kind of harmful cause, or something along those lines, donating it may lead to the best outcome. > > There are some problems that money can make worse. But the heirs are legally entitled to the money. This would be akin to as if an employer said, “My employee is an alcoholic and will just blow the money on booze, so I will donate his salary to charity instead.” ---
**Author:** ![filmore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7993a0/32.png) [@filmore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filmore)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2016, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600/48 "2016-10-28T15:02:52Z")
> [@cwthree](#): > > Not as far as I know. > I don’t know. Not sure who the trustee is/was. Is there any chance the “trust” is nothing more than Bertha’s own bank account? ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2016, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600/49 "2016-10-28T21:35:44Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > But the heirs are legally entitled to the money. This would be akin to as if an employer said, “My employee is an alcoholic and will just blow the money on booze, so I will donate his salary to charity instead.” So if you owed your sister $200, and you knew she’d immediately spend it on enough heroin to OD and leave her kids orphaned, you wouldn’t do some soul searching about how to handle the situation? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bickering-over-a-will-whos-wrong-and-how-wrong/769600.md?page=2)