I don’t think I’ve ever posted about this before … No names, this is still a current celebrity, although not my current job. But on my honor, this is true.
About eight-ten years ago, I was working for a wireless communication company, in the billing research department. We handled the situations where there was an escalated billing dispute that was too involved for a CSR to resolve it on the phone. One of my areas of responsibility was text messaging charge disputes. Procedure was to pull the customer’s contract to verify what they’d agreed to (x messages/month, y characters counts as a message, $z per message over the limit), then to pull the detail records of messages sent to/from their devices. (We used one of the systems that archives everything sent through it for a few months.) The latter was partly just to have something to show the customer, but partly because it wasn’t completely unheard of for the system to generate spurious counts. (Or so I was told–I never saw an example.) We’d skim through the lists of messages, making sure there weren’t long stretches of computer-generated gibberish.
So, I was working a dispute of this kind for a sports agency. Pulled their text messaging records, and on skimming through was intrigued to see that they were the agents for Big Sports Star. Not his real name–but I mean it when I say that this is a Big Sports Star. You may not follow sports, but you’ve almost certainly heard of this guy. He’s that Big. (Still is, hence the pseudonym. Not as Big as he once was, but still pretty damn Big.) Anyway, they had messages to each other reminding them to get such-and-such thing for Big Sports Star, or to pick up Big Sports Star’s mom at the airport at such-and-such a time. I thought that was very cool!
Then I found the messages from Crazy Girl. She was texting one of Big Sports Star’s agents, threatening to go to the media with the fact that he was her baby’s daddy, if she didn’t get paid off.
Seriously. She was blackmailing BSS via text message. :eek:
My favorite quote (redacted, of course): “Bill Cosby wouldn’t pay, but BSS will.” 
Now, here’s the thing. This was many years ago. And over that time period, BSS has apparently been happily married, and I have never heard any whiff of scandal from the media about Crazy Girl or anybody else being in his life. He is by all accounts a good, faithful family man. So Crazy Girl must have either been:
- Successfully paid off,
- Convinced that going public would result in Very Bad Things, or
- Whacked.
So one way or another, this was successfully covered up.
Even if Crazy Girl was even crazier than she obviously was, and was making the whole thing up, it would still be a newsworthy story, right?
(No, I won’t tell you who BSS is. He’s not only Big in the sense of being a big celebrity with lots of money to hire good lawyers, but also Big in the sense of being able to crush my skull like a grape. So you’re on your own.)