# Biker Gang of Fools **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 23, 2004, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/biker-gang-of-fools/261073 "2004-08-23T11:49:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/biker-gang-of-fools/261073/141 "2004-08-27T18:45:47Z")
> [@Bumbazine](#): > > Hey! I had first dibs! mumble mumble claim-jumpin’ mumble mumble Maybe there’s enough to go around, **'zine** … 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Kallessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7993a0/32.png) [@Kallessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kallessa)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/biker-gang-of-fools/261073/142 "2004-08-27T18:54:24Z")
I believe **Bumba** can attest to the veracity of the second part of my signature. ---
**Author:** ![Ashes\_Ashes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/db5fbb/32.png) [@Ashes\_Ashes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashes_Ashes)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/biker-gang-of-fools/261073/143 "2004-08-27T20:46:48Z")
> [@Bumbazine](#): > > Hey! I had first dibs! mumble mumble claim-jumpin’ mumble mumble Now, now boys; I _do_ have two of them. And the last part of **Kalley** ’s sig could go for me as well, hence the quandry over inflicting breastage mid-hug. My SDMB file is composed of impulse and good intentions, therefore light and airy like a pixie. It’s friday and I do believe I shall enjoy an adult-type beverage when I get home this evening. One week down, forty-odd to go! ---
**Author:** ![dwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dwyr/32/363_2.png) [@dwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwyr)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/biker-gang-of-fools/261073/144 "2004-08-27T20:49:15Z")
So I get to work and check to see if there’s anything pending I need to worry about first. Nope, so I sit down to check my e-mail. I see a message entitled “Amphetamines are here.” and my first mental reaction is “Yay!”. Does this sound as strange as I think it does? ---
**Author:** ![Ashes\_Ashes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/db5fbb/32.png) [@Ashes\_Ashes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashes_Ashes)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/biker-gang-of-fools/261073/145 "2004-08-27T21:02:15Z")
Not half as odd as if you’d said “Yay!” to one of those sexxxy farm animal spams. ---
**Author:** ![Bumbazine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbazine/32/362_2.png) [@Bumbazine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbazine)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/biker-gang-of-fools/261073/146 "2004-08-27T21:06:41Z")
BAILIFF: -bored- Repeat after me. BUMBAZINE: Repeat after me. BAILIFF: -annoyed- NOT YET! BUMBAZINE: -faking contrition- Sorry. BAILIFF: -wary- I promise to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help me Og. BUMBAZINE: -deadpan- I promise to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help me Og. JUDGE: -bored- You may be seated. LAWYER: -officious- Please state your name and your avocation for the record. BUMBAZINE: -monotone- My name is Bumbazine and I’m an MMP poster. LAWYER: -looking at jury- Are you familiar with the MMP poster known as Kallessa? BUMBAZINE: -looking at jury- Yes. LAWYER: -forcefully- In fact isn’t it true that you have met the poster known as Kallessa in a number of drinking establishments under dubious circumstances? BUMBAZINE: -injured tone- I’ll have you know I’m a married man. LAWYER: -satisfied- Just answer he question. JUDGE: -bored- The witness will answer. BUMBAZINE: -cautiously- I’ve met Kallessa, along with a number of other Dopers, in a social setting a couple of times. LAWYER: -triumphant- AH HA! For the purpose of smoking dope! BUMBAZINE: -wary- NO! That’s just what we call ourselves. LAWYER: -skeptical- That sounds pretty suspicious to me. BUMBAZINE: -defiantly- Is that a question? LAWYER: -looks hard at Bumbazine- Never mind. At these allegedly ‘social’ meetings, have you had occasion to observe Ms. Kallessa’s appearance? BUMBAZINE: - wary- Purely for purposes of future identification, yes. LAWYER: -officious again- Just answer yes or no. Now would you say, in your opinion, being especially experienced at observing women’s attributes as you are, That Ms. Kallessa’s ‘bounty’ in her, uh, chestal region, could be considered ‘legendary’? BUMBAZINE: -pedantically- As near as I could determine, intervening articles of clothing notwithstanding, and purely for purposes of future identification, you understand… LAWYER: -exasperated- Just answer yes or no! BUMBAZINE: -annoyed- Yes! LAWYER: -triumphant- I rest my case. ---
**Author:** ![Kallessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7993a0/32.png) [@Kallessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kallessa)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/biker-gang-of-fools/261073/147 "2004-08-27T21:32:54Z")
As an officer of the court, I feel it is my duty to report that however **Bumba** came to recognize my chestal area, he has been at all time a perfect gentleman and a model husband. More’s the pity. **dwyr** , I’m not getting amphetamines (and more’s the pity to that as well) but if anyone needs “anonymous drugs, no prescription needed”, I’ve got a source. At least the ones trying the hook me up with hot girls seemed to have stopped. I’ve never been invited to view sexy farm animals—and I’d need a lot of those anonymous drugs before I’d take up an offer like that! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![dwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dwyr/32/363_2.png) [@dwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwyr)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2004, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/biker-gang-of-fools/261073/148 "2004-08-28T00:32:48Z")
Well, never mind the drugs. [This is a better upper.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=5210449#post5210449) ('specially posts #10-12) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/biker-gang-of-fools/261073.md?page=7)