# Birds are mammals!!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [October 31, 2004, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126 "2004-10-31T04:37:50Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 3
### Author:  [@Leonard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leonard)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2004, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/41 "2004-10-31T17:50:34Z")
> [@Excalibre](#):
>
> So let’s get this straight. Two sexes. One squirts something into the other, whereupon an egg is fertilized and held until birth. Sounds exactly like mammalian birth. Now, how do we know the pregnant seahorse is a boy?
He keeps leaving the lid up?
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### Author:  [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2004, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/42 "2004-10-31T18:09:32Z")
For mammalian gestation, one must
Have a lot more than egg, sperm and lust.
For the egg must be sent
To a womb with placent-
a, umbilically fed. And it just
Can’t be said that a seahorse’s sac
Is the same, for the dad is not ac-
tually carrying the roe
Amniotically, so
The analogy falls on that fact.
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### Author:  [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2004, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/43 "2004-10-31T20:48:30Z")
The female seahorse makes the eggs. The male fertilizes them. Then the female lays the fertilized eggs in the male’s pouch. He hangs on to them until they hatch.
Oh, yeah.
Amphibians are reptiles!
Algae are Archae!
Nematodes are echinoderms!!!
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### Author:  [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2004, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/44 "2004-10-31T21:06:42Z")
Monerans are protists!
Eukaryotes are prokaryotes!
Soylent Green is porcines!
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### Author:  [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2004, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/45 "2004-10-31T21:12:41Z")
> [@DocCathode](#):
>
> Soylent Green is porcines!
Only the chauvinist flavors!
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### Author:  [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2004, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/46 "2004-10-31T21:55:45Z")
_You and me baby ain’t nothin’ but mammals,
so let’s do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
-Bloodhound Gang_😛
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### Author:  [@dwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwyr)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/47 "2004-11-01T01:19:12Z")
> [@DocCathode](#):
>
> Eukaryotes are prokaryotes!
Hey!
I don’t know about the rest of you organisms, but _I’m_ certainly not!
True nucleus all the way, baby.
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### Author:  [@if6was9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/if6was9)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/48 "2004-11-01T04:40:03Z")
> [@DocCathode](#):
>
> Soylent Green is porcines!
Soylent Green is people!
THEY’RE EATING PEOPLE!!!
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### Author:  [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/49 "2004-11-01T04:47:57Z")
> [@Middlecase](#):
>
> Shouldn’t that be Echidnae and Platypods {or Platypoda}?
Idiot! It’s platy_pussies_!
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### Author:  [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/50 "2004-11-01T04:58:20Z")
> [@DocCathode](#):
>
> Soylent Green is porcines!
You’re mixing it up with Spam. Remember: Spam is SPiced hAM and is not kosher. Soylent Green is spiced human (shouldn’t it be called Spuman then?) and isn’t specifically forbidden in Leviticus but if you look at your hooves you’re likely to conclude that you’re off limits and so people shouldn’t eat people but if it’s between a married couple and it strengthens their marriage without harming anybody I think most rabbis will let it pass.
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### Author:  [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/51 "2004-11-01T05:04:31Z")
Foreskins make great “pork rinds”.
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### Author:  [@if6was9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/if6was9)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/52 "2004-11-01T05:16:26Z")
> [@Loopydude](#):
>
> Foreskins make great “pork rinds”.
Or Calamari…
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### Author:  [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/53 "2004-11-01T13:17:41Z")
_Nous sont tout de mammifere!_
(From a _strange_ bilingual children’s teaching song used at a Canadian natural history museum)
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### Author:  [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/54 "2004-11-01T14:34:40Z")
I know they’re not. When I was about 8 years old, I had a globe of the world that came with a 45 RPM record on which a narrator described a sea voyage around the world; you were supposed to follow along on the globe. When you got to Australia, the narrator mentioned the Platypus as being “half bird–half animal”!!
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### Author:  [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/55 "2004-11-01T14:41:36Z")
I’ve built a device which removes all the salt from my vast supply of iodine.
Which is a good thing, as one needs salt to catch birds. You sneak up behind, put salt on their tail, and then you catch the bird! Easy as one two three…
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### Author:  [@caveman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/caveman)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/56 "2004-11-01T15:35:36Z")
> [@DocCathode](#):
>
> Monerans are protists!
>
> Eukaryotes are prokaryotes!
>
> Soylent Green is porcines!
Human sacrifice, dogs and cats, livinging togther…mass hysteria!
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### Author:  [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/57 "2004-11-01T15:52:52Z")
> [@dropzone](#):
>
> As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly!
They do not so much fly as plummet.
Somebody had to do it. 🙂
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### Author:  [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/58 "2004-11-01T16:26:13Z")
> [@Caught@Work](#):
>
> Echidna and Platypus are monotremes.
I don’t _care_ how many rail their choo-choos run on, keep em away from me.
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### Author:  [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/59 "2004-11-01T18:01:29Z")
Pumpkins can fly too! They just have trouble with the landing.
(Is this gonna get moved to MPSIMS anytime soon?)
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### Author:  [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2004, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birds-are-mammals/272126/60 "2004-11-01T18:22:34Z")
> [@Loopydude](#):
>
> Foreskins make great “pork rinds”.
>
> > [@if6was9](#):
> >
> > Or Calamari…
Now does this mean:
1. Foreskins make good Calamari
2. Calamari makes a good substitute for foreskin
3. Both 1. and 2.
4. Some, but not all cephalopods are circumcised
_Seafood foreskins. The other white meat_
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