# Birther Mania **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 11, 2010, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051 "2010-05-11T14:58:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/41 "2010-05-12T17:18:01Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > It was actually the Clinton campaign that made it an issue (during the Democratic primaries). Here it comes … wait for it … \* Cite?\* ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/42 "2010-05-12T17:33:37Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > Here it comes … wait for it … > \* > Cite?\* Really? Alright then. Philip Berg- a Democratic activist and lawyer, and Clinton supporter- filed [the first Birther suit](http://www.clevelandleader.com/node/6524) against Obama in July 2008, “on behalf of the Democratic Party” (his words), although Clinton dropped out of the race on June 7. Obama released his birth certificate for the first time on June 13. It’s not like its origin makes the conspiracy theory any less stupid. It’s just worth noting that it didn’t start with Republican idiots. Me, I’m just wondering when the Birthers will notice the striking phonetic similarity between “Sue Dunham” and “pseudonym”. ETA: I guess it was unfair to say “the Clinton campaign” were responsible. Amend that to “Clinton supporters”. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/43 "2010-05-12T17:39:54Z")
[QUOTE=Really Not All That Bright] I doubt he actually believes it. He just wants his 15 seconds and/or an xcuse not to deploy **that won’t make him look like a coward**. [/QUOTE] Too late. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/44 "2010-05-12T17:40:03Z")
Oh, and if you want true “Birther Mania”, [here](http://www.thepostemail.com/2010/01/05/who%E2%80%99s-your-daddy-who%E2%80%99s-your-mama/)’s a fun (ie., fucking insane) read. Highlights: > [@](#): > > SCENARIO FOUR: Are Malcolm X and Betty Shabazz Obama’s parents? > [@](#): > > SCENARIO FIVE: Is Obama the grandson of Sukarno? ---
**Author:** ![Amber\_in\_Treasury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc79bd/32.png) [@Amber\_in\_Treasury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amber_in_Treasury)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/45 "2010-05-12T17:47:43Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Oh, and if you want true “Birther Mania”, [here](http://www.thepostemail.com/2010/01/05/who%E2%80%99s-your-daddy-who%E2%80%99s-your-mama/)’s a fun (ie., fucking insane) read. Highlights: WHAT has this concerned citized been SMOKING? :eek: Bring back Oily Taint - she at least was funny. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/46 "2010-05-12T18:28:01Z")
> [@Amber\_in\_Treasury](#): > > Bring back Oily Taint - she at least was funny. Whar are you talking about. That guy is so much funnier than Orly! Did you read this part: > [@](#): > > What were Malcolm X, Fidel Castro, and Nikita Khrushchev talking to each other about? And where does Barack Obama (Sr.) fit in? Why would he have been in New York and not in his classes at the University of Hawaii, which had already started? What was so compelling that he would have skipped his classes to be part of whatever was going on in the Theresa Hotel with Castro and Malcolm X? Was he being recruited and groomed to be the “father” – or father in name only – of Barack Obama II, in furtherance of a grand conspiracy to overthrow the U.S. government? That is the funniest shit I have read in weeks! The only thing its missing is UFOs and Elvis. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/47 "2010-05-12T18:29:35Z")
Wikipedia page: [Barack Obama citizenship conspiracy theories.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obama_birth_certificate) Pretty thorough. ---
**Author:** ![gonzomax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e8c25b/32.png) [@gonzomax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzomax)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/48 "2010-05-12T18:36:52Z")
If Beck and Rush say he is not a citizen , it must be so. They have the largest ratings on talk radio. What more do you need ? And, they are loud. ---
**Author:** ![psychobunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@psychobunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychobunny)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/49 "2010-05-12T18:45:50Z")
Lets not forget that in 1961, to be an American citizen born outside this country you had to be born to a parent who was a citizen and had lived in the US for at least 5 years after the age of 14 and since Obama’s mother was only 18 when he was born she doesn’t qualify. Also let’s not forget the “Kenyan Birth Certificate” the birthers came up with. And besides, since his father would have been a British citizen he would have had dual citizenship and you can’t be President if you have dual citizenship, and he went to Pakistan when he was in college when Americans couldn’t go so he must have had a passport from another country and besides didn’t his stepfather adopt him because he used that name in school so he’s actually an Indonesian citizen and since he changed citizenship he’s not really a citizen and and and… ---
**Author:** ![Amber\_in\_Treasury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc79bd/32.png) [@Amber\_in\_Treasury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amber_in_Treasury)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/50 "2010-05-12T18:55:27Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > Whar are you talking about. That guy is so much funnier than Orly! Did you read this part: That is the funniest shit I have read in weeks! The only thing its missing is UFOs and Elvis. While Concerned Citizen’s squirrelshit nuttiness is definitely on par with Oily’s, does he have the drag-queen lashes and the shrieky voice too? Or how about the snowy-owl/greasy-perineum name? The dentist’s-chair boinkage? ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/51 "2010-05-12T19:08:10Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > That’s not a Birth Certificate; that’s a Certificate of Birth. What is ya, ignerant? Y’all spelt ignant wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/52 "2010-05-12T19:36:14Z")
Well, nothing, I mean nothing will convince these people that Obama is not a nig… ahem, Kenyan. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/53 "2010-05-12T19:42:15Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Oh, and if you want true “Birther Mania”, [here](http://www.thepostemail.com/2010/01/05/who%E2%80%99s-your-daddy-who%E2%80%99s-your-mama/)’s a fun (ie., fucking insane) read. Highlights: Holy cow that’s some Grade-A crazy! I’m not sure even Oily could keep a straight face. \*\*SCENARIO ONE: Are Barack Obama Sr. and Stanley Ann Dunham Obama’s parents? \*\* > [@](#): > > To this day, we have no idea if Ann gave birth to Barack Obama or was just the woman chosen to raise him by the grand conspirators who plotted his rise to power from as far back as the 1950s, before his birth! The public has seen virtually no photographs of Barack as an infant or toddler, and the very few photos that exist call into question if the young child is indeed Barack or someone else’s child – perhaps one of the young children of Frank Marshall Davis. \*\* SCENARIO THREE: Was Obama’s father Frank Marshall Davis or Malcolm X? \*\* > [@](#): > > Or was Frank Marshall Davis so much a part of the plot to overthrow America that he wrote the rape story to throw people off the trail, to conceal the man he knew to be Barack’s real father? Was he covering for his ideological comrade and fellow traveler Malcolm X? \*\* SCENARIO FIVE: Is Obama the grandson of Sukarno? \*\* > [@](#): > > Am I the only one who cringes when I read that Barack Obama’s book, The Audacity of Hope, translates in Indonesian to: Jihad, From Jakarta to the White House? I am certainly not the only one who watched Obama on election night and witnessed his wife appear in a dress of the revolutionary and anarchic colors of red and black, with a gigantic sash in the unmistakable configuration of an X – and his very young daughters also dressed in revolutionary red and black. \*\* SCENARIO SIX: Is the CIA behind Obama’s attempted coup d’état? \*\* > [@](#): > > What force but the most powerful spy agency in the world would have the ability to Silence – Bribe? Intimidate? Threaten? – 435 United States Representatives and Senators, the courts of our land, and almost the entire media? > Or have the estimable CIA and FBI and other foreign spy agencies been bought off by George Soros and mega-rich leftists like him in the same way that the way the craven Democrat senators were just bribed and intimidated and threatened to go along with the Obama socialized medicine scheme which more than 65 percent of Americans revile? ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/54 "2010-05-12T19:52:48Z")
Man, and I thought we had good drugs in the 60s! ---
**Author:** ![Valgard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/7feea3/32.png) [@Valgard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Valgard)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/55 "2010-05-12T20:28:48Z")
> [@Rhythmdvl](#): > > Holy cow that’s some Grade-A crazy! I’m not sure even Oily could keep a straight face. > > \*\*SCENARIO ONE: Are Barack Obama Sr. and Stanley Ann Dunham Obama’s parents? \*\*\*\* SCENARIO THREE: Was Obama’s father Frank Marshall Davis or Malcolm X? \*\*\*\* SCENARIO FIVE: Is Obama the grandson of Sukarno? \*\*\*\* SCENARIO SIX: Is the CIA behind Obama’s attempted coup d’état? \*\* Ooh! I want to play! **SCENARIO SEVEN: Does Obama command a secret army of Oompa Loompas?** **SCENARIO EIGHT: Is Obama actually a Red Lectroid From Dimension Twelve?** **SCENARIO NINE: Did Obama steal all my antipsychotic drugs?** ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/56 "2010-05-12T20:32:35Z")
Silly humans. Obama is Kodos. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/57 "2010-05-12T20:35:31Z")
**SCENARIO X: Is Barack Obama the lovechild of JFK and Angela Davis?** ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/58 "2010-05-12T20:40:58Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Oh, and if you want true “Birther Mania”, [here](http://www.thepostemail.com/2010/01/05/who%E2%80%99s-your-daddy-who%E2%80%99s-your-mama/)’s a fun (ie., fucking insane) read. When a crackpot customer notices an Obama button in the pizza delivery car, [hilarity ensues](http://notalwaysright.com/pepperoni-extremism/3163)… ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/59 "2010-05-12T20:50:03Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > That is the funniest shit I have read in weeks! The only thing its missing is UFOs and Elvis. I hear it in my mind’s ear being read in the voice of Lyndon LaRouche from those droning infomercials he did back in the day. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051/60 "2010-05-12T20:51:26Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Man, and I thought we had good drugs in the 60s! This is where you end up after doing too much LDS. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birther-mania/539051.md?page=4)