# Birthing at home: Getting over the fear. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 10, 2011, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990 "2011-06-10T16:44:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 18
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2011, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/341 "2011-06-19T20:03:38Z")
I’ve been staying out of this thread for obvious reasons, but I can sing the praises of Hypnobabies/Hypnobirthing (I did the former). Labor was not at all painful, and when the shit hit the fan, the calming techniques I learned helped me relax and were pretty instrumental in saving my daughter’s life. I’ll bow out of this thread now. It’s not worth it. **Phil** , feel free to PM me if you want more info. ---
**Author:** ![Girl\_From\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3da27b/32.png) [@Girl\_From\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girl_From_Mars)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2011, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/342 "2011-06-19T20:48:10Z")
> [@Drain\_Bead](#): > > I’ve been staying out of this thread for obvious reasons, but I can sing the praises of Hypnobabies/Hypnobirthing (I did the former). Labor was not at all painful, and when the shit hit the fan, the calming techniques I learned helped me relax and were pretty instrumental in saving my daughter’s life. > > I’ll bow out of this thread now. It’s not worth it. **Phil** , feel free to PM me if you want more info. I think this shows that labour is a very personal thing - I found it really good in my first 30 or so hours of labour to help relax and focus on each contraction rising and falling; but when I got into active labour, there was no way that it helped - my labour was too painful (and yep, despite what Marie Mongan said, pain is not a myth!). Instead, squeezing stress balls, warm showers and lots of moaning were what I needed to do to get through it. But it was good to have in the kit bag - my experience simply suggests to not rely completely on one method. ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2011, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/343 "2011-06-19T21:29:26Z")
> [@CitizenPained](#): > > There’s [Mountain Midwifery](http://www.mountainmidwifery.com/) Interesting link. Under their FAQs, they list all of the situations in which they’re not able to provide birth services. It’s a very long list. ---
**Author:** ![Shayna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shayna/32/17976_2.png) [@Shayna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shayna)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2011, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/344 "2011-06-19T22:14:32Z")
> [@lorene](#): > > Interesting link. Under their FAQs, they list all of the situations in which they’re not able to provide birth services. It’s a very long list. Good lord, I love how they’re bald-faced enough to compare their emergency transport times to that which occurs in RURAL areas. As if being IN a hospital in a major metropolitan area like Boulder is in any way comparable to giving birth in a barn out in the sticks. :rolleyes: > [@](#): > > However, if an emergency transfer to the hospital during labor is necessary, this trip takes only 3 minutes by ambulance, putting us well within a 30 minute “decision to incision” standard for cesarean section that most hospitals strive to achieve. This emergency responsiveness is better than that provided by many rural hospitals. I’m liking this idea less and less. Sorry, Phl. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2011, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/345 "2011-06-19T23:21:24Z")
> [@BottledBlondJeanie](#): > > By the way, could you please address the concern I had as to your friend home birthing twins. Where midwives are allowed many states will yank their licenses for that. Sorry about that, I meant to answer but got busy talking about other things. I don’t know all of the details about my friend’s decision to birth her twins at home, so I sent her an email asking her to address your questions from the other thread. I do know that she had already had two home births and one hospital birth prior to the twins, so she was very confident in that decision. I’ll get back to you on this as soon as I hear from her. ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2011, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/346 "2011-06-20T00:04:14Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Hypnotherapy isn’t a breathing technique. No, it’s a relaxation technique using some kind of self-hypnosis techniques. I’m no expert, but if it will help with pain I have no problems with it. Not sure how that was funny though. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2011, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/347 "2011-06-20T03:22:59Z")
> [@Phlosphr](#): > > No, it’s a relaxation technique using some kind of self-hypnosis techniques. I’m no expert, but if it will help with pain I have no problems with it. Not sure how that was funny though. It’s amusing because you referenced a “hypnobirthing specialist in the family who is touting it’s advantages” like that any sort of impartial endorsement. Assuming this specialist charges money, they have a vested interest in convincing people it works so their opinion about the effectiveness is somewhat suspect, like asking the late Billy Mays for his opinion of OxiClean and expecting the unvarnished truth. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2011, 7:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/348 "2011-06-20T07:40:42Z")
> [@elfkin477](#): > > Assuming this specialist charges money, they have a vested interest in convincing people it works Well, I doubt ANYONE is working for free - OB/GYNs, nurses, midwives, ambulance drivers, anesthesiologists, floor sweepers … so that particular argument cuts both ways. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2011, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/349 "2011-06-20T12:17:33Z")
> [@CairoCarol](#): > > Well, I doubt ANYONE is working for free - OB/GYNs, nurses, midwives, ambulance drivers, anesthesiologists, floor sweepers … so that particular argument cuts both ways. Only if the hypnobirthing guy has peer-reviewed studies to show this stuff actually improves anything. If you can prove it helps, awesome, I’ll believe every word you say. If you can’t, I’m gonna take everything with an entire salt lick. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2011, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/350 "2011-06-20T13:38:45Z")
> [@CrazyCatLady](#): > > Only if the hypnobirthing guy has peer-reviewed studies to show this stuff actually improves anything. If you can prove it helps, awesome, I’ll believe every word you say. If you can’t, I’m gonna take everything with an entire salt lick. Well, yeah, absolutely. Did I disagree with that somehow? Because I assure you that was not my intent. I am in complete agreement with your statement above. I just think that getting sidetracked into the “well gosh but s/he gets PAID” line of argument is irrelevant and weak for either side. I’d prefer to stick with direct evidence. ---
**Author:** ![raspberry\_hunter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b19c9b/32.png) [@raspberry\_hunter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raspberry_hunter)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2011, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/351 "2011-06-20T16:10:48Z")
> [@Indygrrl](#): > > I understand what you are saying, but I still think those words can be very dissmissive and hurtful to someone who has had birth trauma. Just pushing the hurt and disappointment down and focusing on the healthy baby probably is what most women do. But it’s still important to deal with those feelings. Yeah, I totally get this too. I think I just parse those particular words differently, probably because no one said those to me right after birth. What they did say to me was “Oh, it will all be worth it once you see your sweet baby!” and those words still fill me with stabbity rage, because it was so _not_ worth it when I saw her, and then I had to deal with feeling like a horrible mom on top of the pain and lack of sleep and whatever. So yeah, I know exactly what you mean – it’s just a different set of words that trigger it for me 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2011, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/352 "2011-06-20T18:16:43Z")
> [@elfkin477](#): > > It’s amusing because you referenced a “hypnobirthing specialist in the family who is touting it’s advantages” like that any sort of impartial endorsement. Assuming this specialist charges money, they have a vested interest in convincing people it works so their opinion about the effectiveness is somewhat suspect, like asking the late Billy Mays for his opinion of OxiClean and expecting the unvarnished truth. I’m not really a believer in Hypnosis, but this person is a close family member who is only saying that it \*can \*help with pain management during birth. She certainly would not charge us for a brief How-To, but I find it kind of irrelevant because we are taking a class all month on all kinds of pain management techniques. I’ve been a meditator for years and though I don’t have access to it now, the studies from the neuroscience world on the efficacy of meditating are becoming quite well documented. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2011, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990/353 "2011-06-21T03:57:49Z")
Whatever works. As long as the baby’s heart chakras are aligned with the stars when he pops out, amirite? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/birthing-at-home-getting-over-the-fear/584990.md?page=17)