# Bizarre Signage - A Directionless MMP **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** mmp\ **Created:** [July 20, 2015, 9:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679 "2015-07-20T09:52:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2015, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/81 "2015-07-21T18:29:53Z")
Just finished half a dozen bibs - two have red crabs, 2 have blue crabs, 2 have black-eyed susans. I’m hoping to get $5 each… that is, I’m hoping the store can sell them for $5 each - I’d get $2.85 of that. We shall see. It’s been really cloudy - here’s hoping it portends rain!! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2015, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/82 "2015-07-21T19:21:21Z")
> [@Catamount](#): > > Judging from the [movie I watched last nigh](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Barbarians_%28film%29)t, yes. Joey, do you like movies about gladiators? 😃 > [@Spiderman](#): > > How do you have it DVR’d, I didn’t think it was [out](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3899796/releaseinfo?ref_=tt_ov_inf+) yet? 😕 He preset his machine? ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2015, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/83 "2015-07-21T19:41:13Z")
> [@kopek](#): > > He preset his machine? I took his past tense that he already had it on his DVR, not queued up to go there tomorer nite. The site that I, ummm, [del]know of[/del] came across once, **once** to watch first run movies at home doesn’t have it; I was wondering if there’s a better one. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2015, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/84 "2015-07-21T20:30:31Z")
> [@Spiderman](#): > > I took his past tense that he already had it on his DVR, not queued up to go there tomorer nite. If I set my VCR yesterday to record something tomorrow, for me at this moment its past tense preparing for a future event??? Just speculating and killing time. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2015, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/85 "2015-07-21T21:36:38Z")
Supper was parmesan pasta with spinach, onions, and shrimps mixed it. Quick, easy, and yum. We had a little rain - barely enough to make the top of the grill wet. Not enough to wet the ground under the trees. Oh well. I see a lazy evening ahead again. Knittage shall ensue. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2015, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/86 "2015-07-21T23:07:01Z")
I think it’s time for ice cream and reclinage. _ **MWAH!** _ ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/87 "2015-07-22T00:02:56Z")
\< **pant, pant** \> Made it! \< **pant, pant** \> Race to the death; me vs. the big, black cloud. It was close; too close, but I made it home. Alive…& dry!!! What? You saw what that bitch, **Dorothy** did to my aunt with that bucket, dinja? ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/88 "2015-07-22T00:54:53Z")
Howdy Y’all! Finally at da cave after irk and VBS. A loooooooong day. Irk was not too bad and neither was taco night (OLÈ!) at the church house but still a looooooong day. We have had various tstorms throughout the late afternoon and early evenin’. As of now, however, 'tis calm out. **MOOOOOOM** that is just one of a very looooooooooong list of reasons why **doggio** shall end up some place very warm. Matter of fact, we’re thinkin’ of sharin’ a handbasket. 😃 Ok, I shall now go surf a couple other places and then it’s beddy bye time. Da bear is tahrd! Nitey Nite Y’all! ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/89 "2015-07-22T01:03:21Z")
I’m calling it a night early myself. Bad insomnia last night, so am very tired after a normal irk day. Did have one trivial triumph: for those who don’t know, I work at a thrift store, and my current assignment is processing donated clothing for sale. I saw a skirt I really liked (dark green, long and full (which I like), nice roomy pockets) come across the sorting table and promptly REALLY wanted it. Rules are that an item has to be on the sales floor, thus giving customers a shot at it, before an employee can buy it and said employee must be off the clock (i.e., on lunch or clocked out for the day or on a day off) to make purchases. Took care of a couple of minor things after clocking out, then hit the sales floor. My green skirt was patiently sitting on a rack, just waiting. It’s now in my closet. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/90 "2015-07-22T01:39:51Z")
> [@Seanette](#): > > It’s now in my closet. 😃 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/91 "2015-07-22T02:16:52Z")
> [@dogbutler](#): > > “Shannon stood nervously, protecting her crease, as Viktor glided across the room, his rigid stick held high. He deked, undressed her, and hit her in her 5hole” - _Penalties of Passion_ **If** you get to Hell for stuff like that I’ll be there waiting, with candy - One _Payday_, _Mr Goodbar_, wanted a _Bit-o-Honey_. So he took his Ms. _Hersheys_ down to the _Powerhouse_ at _5th Avenue_ and _Clark_. Where he there began to feel her _Mounds_ and that was an _Almond Joy_ which definetly made his _Tootsie Roll_. He let out a _Snicker_ when he slipped his _Butterfinger_ up her _Kit Kat_. She screamed “_Oh Henry_” while she grabbed his Peter Paul and _Zagnuts_ and said “you’re better than the _3 Musketeers_.” & cigarettes - One \*Kool \*evening in _Winston-Salem_ North Carolina, Miss _Pall-Mall_, who had just flown in from \*Marlboro \*country, went for a stroll down \*Chesterfield \*Lane. she weas going over to \*Kent \*to meet _Philip Morris_, A \*Viceroy \*from \*Raleigh \*- to go to the \*Tareyton \*Hotel for a _Lark_. As they lay in an _Old Gold_ bed, watching TV, she murmured, “It’s not how long you make it, it’s how you make it long.” With that, he popped is king-sized _L&M_ into her flip-top box; & if she doesn’t look lika a _Camel_ in nine months, it will have been a _Lucky Strike_. But don’t worry, _Philip Morris_ was a thinking man. He used a filter tip! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/92 "2015-07-22T02:20:44Z")
Got to visit with Beloved Brother and Most Favorite Nephew today. Not wanting to send totally insane mother off the deep end we had to do it by stealth but --------- we got it done. OK – I’ve had a few more beers than is probably good for me and this may be making me talk about personal stuff more than I usually do here. But those of you with half-way normal parents consider yourselves lucky. When you actually have one who runs the gambit from wanting you dead to treating you as if you were dead, it puts a lot of pressure on everyone else. Even if you have personally come to terms with it. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/93 "2015-07-22T02:49:28Z")
I worked in the store in da Hood. No stabbings tonight. > [@FairyChatMom](#): > > \*\*doggio \*\*- you’re going to hell for that, just so you know. 😛 You’re just jealous I’m in for an eternity of s’mores. > [@Spiderman](#): > > **If** you get to Hell for stuff like that I’ll be there waiting, > with candy - > > One _Payday_, _Mr Goodbar_, wanted a _Bit-o-Honey_. So he took his Ms. _Hersheys_ down to the _Powerhouse_ at _5th Avenue_ and _Clark_. Where he there began to feel her _Mounds_ and that was an _Almond Joy_ which definetly made his _Tootsie Roll_. > He let out a _Snicker_ when he slipped his _Butterfinger_ up her _Kit Kat_. She screamed “_Oh Henry_” while she grabbed his Peter Paul and _Zagnuts_ and said “you’re better than the _3 Musketeers_.” > & cigarettes - > > One \*Kool \*evening in _Winston-Salem_ North Carolina, Miss _Pall-Mall_, who had just flown in from \*Marlboro \*country, went for a stroll down \*Chesterfield \*Lane. she weas going over to \*Kent \*to meet _Philip Morris_, A \*Viceroy \*from \*Raleigh \*- to go to the \*Tareyton \*Hotel for a _Lark_. > As they lay in an _Old Gold_ bed, watching TV, she murmured, “It’s not how long you make it, it’s how you make it long.” With that, he popped is king-sized _L&M_ into her flip-top box; & if she doesn’t look lika a _Camel_ in nine months, it will have been a _Lucky Strike_. > But don’t worry, _Philip Morris_ was a thinking man. He used a filter tip! : holds up lighter : > [@kopek](#): > > Got to visit with Beloved Brother and Most Favorite Nephew today. Not wanting to send totally insane mother off the deep end we had to do it by stealth but --------- we got it done. > > OK – I’ve had a few more beers than is probably good for me and this may be making me talk about personal stuff more than I usually do here. But those of you with half-way normal parents consider yourselves lucky. When you actually have one who runs the gambit from wanting you dead to treating you as if you were dead, it puts a lot of pressure on everyone else. Even if you have personally come to terms with it. ☹ Sorry, **Ruble**. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 8:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/94 "2015-07-22T08:59:48Z")
Sorry, **Ruble** …my parents turned out to be fairly normal after all, even though my mother is now pretty much mad as cheese. She still has all her marbles but they’re no longer rolling around in the same box, and occasionally they go off at strange angles and have to be rescued. Had some very sad news today, one of my favourite lecturers told us recently that her husband was diagnosed with end stage lung cancer. Sadly he passed away yesterday afternoon. It wasn’t unexpected, but it was much sooner than we had thought it would happen. Fortunately he was at home with her and their beloved rescue Alsatian, which is how she wanted it to be for him. She is a strong person but without him, we are not sure how she’ll cope. Please spare her some of your kind thoughts. In other news…nuffinks! ---
**Author:** ![Channing\_Idaho\_Banks](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/channing_idaho_banks/32/250_2.png) [@Channing\_Idaho\_Banks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Channing_Idaho_Banks)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 9:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/95 "2015-07-22T09:30:29Z")
Signage is one of my favorite topics, especially BAD signage. ## One of my favorite signs I spotted at a freeway off-ramp was a hand printed sign advertising: **Sign’s (555)212-1212** CIB (That wasn’t really the real phone number) ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/96 "2015-07-22T10:01:22Z")
I just thought of a great post-retirement business venture - I’ll start a company to remove unnecessary apostrophe’s 😃 from signs! I’ll make a fortune!! On the other hand, I’ll be exhausted because there’s so much to do… never mind. It’s the not-ridiculously hot morning of a not-ridiculously hot day so I have a few windows open. I’ll take advantage of the lower humidity, too, by doing some laundry. And sometime today, I have to run to Food Lion - we’re almost out of milk. So some chores, but nothing extreme as far as I can tell. We went to bed early last night and I slept pretty well, in fact, I don’t recall having any problems nodding off, so yay! As usual, 5AM came too soon, but until \*\*FCD \*\*retires again, that’s gonna happen - till December of 2016. Still, so far, it’s a good day. Happy Wednesday!! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 10:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/97 "2015-07-22T10:10:50Z")
Good Mornin’ Y’all! Up and caffeinatin’. _YAWN_ ‘Tis 75 Amurrkin out with a predicted high of 97 and a heat advisory for this afternoon. There may also be rain/tstorms/apocalypse late afternoon/early evenin’. IOW a typical Summer’s day in south Jawja. Tonight is the last night of VBS. I shall grill copious amounts of burgers and dawgs. Tonight’s events shall be held at [Chehaw Park](http://chehaw.org/) in the big pavilion. I am takin’ off irk this afternoon to assist with gettin’ everything set up plus burger and dawg grillin’. The grillin’ shall take place at the church house where I can use the biiiiiiiiiiiiig propane grill. If’n it’s timed just right, I can get the burgers and dawgs to the park still warm by the time the humanlets arrive. Ok, that’s all I got. I need more caffeine and rumbly tummy wants to be fed. Then, alas and alack, purtification for irk must commence. At least 'tis only a half day today. Happy Hump Day Y’all! ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/98 "2015-07-22T10:23:28Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > I just thought of a great post-retirement business venture - I’ll start a company to remove unnecessary apostrophe’s 😃 from signs! I’ll make a fortune!! [Weird Al Yankovic](https://youtu.be/QgTsF1ZCuRc) is [way ahead of you](https://youtu.be/RGWiTvYZR_w). ---
**Author:** ![Sahirrnee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sahirrnee/32/13937_2.png) [@Sahirrnee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sahirrnee)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/99 "2015-07-22T11:41:49Z")
Happy Hump Day! It’s so nice and cool outside, I need to open the windows for a bit. Today is the day my mother and niece come for a visit. My niece is taking Sah-son to the college and help him finish registration. He is already getting upset/nervous. I have to run the vacuum one last time. That will be one stress down and one to go. I have to see the doctor on Friday, I am so not looking forward to this exam. My friend has to work so I have to drive myself - downtown - and I hate driving downtown. {{{ **Ruble** }}} {{{ **BooFae and friend** }}} Have fun **Swampy** ---
**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2015, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679/100 "2015-07-22T11:45:14Z")
Up, caffeinated, off to work. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bizarre-signage-a-directionless-mmp/725679.md?page=6)