# Black women and "Mmmmm MM MM!" **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [May 8, 2006, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886 "2006-05-08T14:15:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2010, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886/41 "2010-10-30T00:47:15Z")
I’m not a black woman, but I play one on TV. Actually, I don’t, but I just wanted to say that since no one else has yet. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2010, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886/42 "2010-10-30T06:34:14Z")
I’m not a black woman, but I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express. Actually, I didn’t, but I just wanted to say that since no one else has yet. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886/43 "2010-10-31T03:14:08Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Why do you say these things, when you know I will kill you for it? Because I know that, steaming from the ears as you might be, you would never raise a hand against a fellow Tolkien freak. ---
**Author:** ![Duke\_of\_Rat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Duke\_of\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke_of_Rat)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886/44 "2010-10-31T18:07:39Z")
My take on it is more like if you hum with the same cadence, stress, and inflection ( I guess that’s what I’m trying to convey) as if you were saying the exaggerated “Oh. My. God”. “Lord have mercy” would be too many syllables. And it’s a Southern-ism. My grandmother did it quite often, and usually in precisely the same situation you’d hear “oh. my. God” today. I suppose it was a way around the whole “taking the lord’s name in vain” thing. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2010, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886/45 "2010-11-01T01:58:42Z")
Black woman here. Yay, something I can answer. For those who aren’t sure what’s being referred to, it’s like this: Mmmmm…mmm…mm Notice that the “mm’s” get shorter and the pause between them gets slightly longer. It is often accompanied with head-shaking and a wan smile. It communicates: “The matter at hand is a damn shame.” But it’s usually used for not-too-serious matters. Best friend just killed herself by hanging herself in front of her children? “Mmm mmm mm” does not belong at all. Neighbor you don’t like with bad-ass kids who you hate does the same exact thing? Yeah, you would do it then. Older women often do it compulsively. The price of soup is up a few cents. A child drops an ice cream cone all over his nice shirt. Jesus is up on the cross, asking God why he is being forsaken. The four horsemen of the Apocalypse were just spotted in lower Manhattan. I find it freakin’ hilarious and hope I’m like this when I get older. I only do it when I’m with another black person who “gets” it (and usually for stupid stuff, like if someone has a run in her stockings or something). I know ya’ll white folk are saying ya’ll do it too, but I have yet to hear a white person do it in all of my 33 years. And I’m from the South too. “Mmmm…mmm…mm” should not be confused with “mmm HMPH!” The latter voices agreement or the affirmative (depending on the context). It’s what you might hear at a black church from the audience. And I have heard plenty of non-black women using this convention. ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2010, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886/46 "2010-11-01T14:15:18Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > Black woman here… Aww, monstro! I was watching this thread with amusement, wondering how many different interpretations would be bandied without any black woman’s output. You had to come in and ruin my fun. Damn shame. Mmm mm mm. ---
**Author:** ![Glory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7cd45c/32.png) [@Glory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Glory)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2010, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886/47 "2010-11-01T14:30:19Z")
My mom does this all the time (exactly as Monstro described - with the head shake). She’s white, from Texas, 63 years old. ---
**Author:** ![Sister\_Vigilante](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Sister\_Vigilante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sister_Vigilante)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2010, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886/48 "2010-11-01T16:48:02Z")
My grandmother said it too. She’s white, or was. She’s dead but that’s not important right now. My 60+ aunt says it. My mother says it too. All white. And to Skald: I saw what you did there. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2010, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886/49 "2010-11-01T16:58:05Z")
> [@Sister\_Vigilante](#): > > And to Skald: I saw what you did there. Which was what? Get annoyed at being treated like the Other? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/black-women-and-mmmmm-mm-mm/355886.md?page=2)