# Bloom County reference - Need Help **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 20, 2009, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682 "2009-02-20T05:08:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/1 "2009-02-20T05:08:52Z")
Okay, help. I remember one bit from one of the Bloom County strips, apparently not enough to google it properly, and I need help to find the strip itself. Someone was going to propose - I think Cutter John? and they were going shopping for an engagement ring. The salesman in the jewelery store was giving him a ridiculously hard time, trying to upsell him to a rock the size of gibraltar. However, the thing that I remember from the strip were the signs in the jewelery store. They changed from panel to panel, but it was always something like “A woman without diamonds doesn’t believe you love her.” The last one was “A woman without diamonds is a tree sloth.” Can anyone find me a copy of that strip? Anyone? ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/2 "2009-02-20T05:22:42Z")
That was Opus getting ready to propose to Lola Granola. Page 71 of “Classics of Western Literature: Bloom County 1986-1989”. The sign says: 1st panel - A woman without diamonds is a tree sloth 3rd panel - A woman without diamonds is gross-buckets 4th panel - A woman without diamonds is like a day without a twinkie 5th panel - A woman without diamonds is a parsnip ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/3 "2009-02-20T05:31:35Z")
Bless you. That’s been bugging me forever!!! I will find it. \<3 \<3 \<3 ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/4 "2009-02-20T05:37:11Z")
14 minutes. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/5 "2009-02-20T05:38:35Z")
This board is amazing. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/6 "2009-02-20T06:15:58Z")
I’ve always wanted to be able to do that - thanks for the opportunity. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/7 "2009-02-20T14:06:58Z")
Oh hey, um, there’s one I’ve always wanted to track down too. All I remember is it involved Opus (that’s the penguin’s name, right?) trying to give a speech, but he keeps screwing up the words “Ladies and Gentlemen.” It was the first comic strip episode (do you call them episodes or what?) that I read and re-read and kept around for a while thinking it was hilarious. I was in approximately the first grade at the time, so who knows whether it was actually funny or not. But finding it would be a nice blast of nostalgia. -FrL- ---
**Author:** ![Snickers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Snickers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snickers)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/8 "2009-02-20T14:52:47Z")
I still whip out “A woman without diamonds is gross buckets” from time to time, especially after jewelry commercials. Mr. Snicks generally looks at me like I’m touched, but damn I loved that strip. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/9 "2009-02-20T15:14:34Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > All I remember is it involved Opus (that’s the penguin’s name, right?) trying to give a speech, but he keeps screwing up the words “Ladies and Gentlemen.” That’s vaguely familiar sounding (unlike the diamonds one which I knew right away). I’ll look for it tonight. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/10 "2009-02-20T15:48:15Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > That’s vaguely familiar sounding (unlike the diamonds one which I knew right away). I’ll look for it tonight. If it helps, I would have been in the First Grade starting in Fall of '85. But I’m not 100% certain I was in First Grade. But it was around then. -FrL- ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/11 "2009-02-20T17:55:55Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > All I remember is it involved Opus (that’s the penguin’s name, right?) trying to give a speech, but he keeps screwing up the words “Ladies and Gentlemen.” If it’s the one I’m thinking of, he steps in front of the mike, clears his throat, and starts shouting nonsense, while waving his fist in a speech-giving style. He was shouting stuff like “IBN MOOT SPEEP BLABOO!” it ends with him complaining to Milo that it’s time to “give the teleprompter a swift kick in the patootie.” ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/12 "2009-02-20T18:01:15Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > It was the first comic strip episode (do you call them episodes or what?) Just “strips,” usually. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/13 "2009-02-20T18:24:11Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > If it’s the one I’m thinking of, he steps in front of the mike, clears his throat, and starts shouting nonsense, while waving his fist in a speech-giving style. He was shouting stuff like “IBN MOOT SPEEP BLABOO!” it ends with him complaining to Milo that it’s time to “give the teleprompter a swift kick in the patootie.” To my recollection (but it was over twenty years ago so who knows) this was a Sunday strip, and Opus tried three or four times to get out “Ladies and Gentlemen,” and when he failed, he dropped down below the podium and hid, complaining to himself about the situation. There _might have been_ another character there trying to encourage him. -FrL- ---
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/14 "2009-02-20T19:11:29Z")
All I can recall with certainty from early Bloom County is “pear pimples for hairy fishnuts.” ---
**Author:** ![duality72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duality72/32/3910_2.png) [@duality72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duality72)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/15 "2009-02-20T20:39:51Z")
As long as we’re looking up Bloom County strips… The one I’m looking for basically consisted of a poem spoken by Oliver Wendell Jones (I think) bemoaning the less-than-extraordinary appearance of Halley’s comet. The part I remember goes: It’s a speck! It’s a spot! It’s just barely a dot! A comet spectacular It most certainly is not! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/16 "2009-02-20T20:55:05Z")
> [@ExTank](#): > > All I can recall with certainty from early Bloom County is “pear pimples for hairy fishnuts.” Just cough up some dough, Mac!!! ---
**Author:** ![HoboStew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/f17d59/32.png) [@HoboStew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoboStew)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/17 "2009-02-20T21:06:48Z")
The earth isn’t round either. Nope! Shaped like a burrito! ---
**Author:** ![Dob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Dob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dob)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/18 "2009-02-20T21:55:56Z")
Man I loved Bloom County! I’m going to have fish out my old Bloom County books tonight and do some reading. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/19 "2009-02-20T22:21:38Z")
Gorbachev sings tractors! Turnip! Buttocks! ---
**Author:** ![ZenBeam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3ab097/32.png) [@ZenBeam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZenBeam)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682/20 "2009-02-20T22:48:11Z")
In a somewhat similar theme to the OP, I remember someone asked Quiche Lorraine if the term “Liberated Woman” meant anything to her. “Fat, manless, and hairy legs.” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bloom-county-reference-need-help/486682.md?page=2)