# Books you threw across the room (maybe spoilers) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 23, 2002, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515 "2002-10-23T13:20:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/61 "2002-10-25T14:45:13Z")
**The Bear** by William Faulkner. I despise stream of consciousness, and I could not for the life of me finish that book. Why do they always assign sucky books in school? ---
**Author:** ![panache](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c77e96/32.png) [@panache](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/62 "2002-10-25T15:00:02Z")
I can’t think of a specific chuck-worthy title, but the later Clive Cussler books are CRAP- What I used to indulge myself in (intrepid heroes on daring adventures using cool-science to foil villainous foes) turned into pretentious “Dirk Pitt followed the action with cool green eyes narrowed to tiny slits, his head tilting hawklike- while standing broadshouldered and manly in the salty wind”-style, wordy, unbelievable CRAP. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/63 "2002-10-25T15:07:15Z")
> [@](#): > > Same reason I can’t stand Hornblower.The books written from another characters perspective or in the third person are all right.Its those written in the first where your privy to his internal monologue i can’t abide .Whinging self-contempt every 10 pages.I really did throw across the room Hornblower and the Happy return Haa-hmmm. I love Hornblower, myself, but if it’s the internal monologue that bothers you, try reading **Lieutenant Hornblower**. It’s the only book (and story) not told from Hornblower’s POV. ---
**Author:** ![Giselle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e495f1/32.png) [@Giselle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giselle)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/64 "2002-10-25T16:24:38Z")
Various fundie Christian books – The **Left Behind** series. Jesus Christ – no pun intended. By book three I was so fed up that I just hid it under the bed. **The Veritas Conflict** by Shaunti Feldhan. A pity, because it’s very well written. I recommended it to several of my friends before I had finished, ignoring the underlying moral of “If you believe in science or anything that is in any way, shape or form secular, you are evil and being controlled by demons.” And Harvard being controlled by the devil? Ugh. I mean, I know a lot of politicians go there, but still. The last thirty or so pages irritated me so much that I flung the damn thing across the room and walked out. I never finished that book. ---
**Author:** ![PhiloVance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e19adc/32.png) [@PhiloVance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PhiloVance)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/65 "2002-10-25T20:06:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cougarfang \* > \*\*Catcher in the Rye. I honestly can’t see what’s so good about it. \*\* Ditto on that. I usually don’t throw books, just give them away to good causes that run thrift stores. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Ol\_Gaffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Ol\_Gaffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ol_Gaffer)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/66 "2002-10-25T21:06:34Z")
I read the following three books while travelling and completely desperate for the printed word (I only mention that I was travelling as I would have otherwise **never** finished any of them). 1) **Travels** by Michael Crichton and previously mentioned by **quarx**. Did you get to the part where he goes out to the desert to some new-age dude ranch and the rock talks to him? Goddamn. 2) **Treasure** by Clive Cussler. What horrible, horrible crap. I can’t believe this stuff even gets published. Mind-numbing pablum. 3) **1st to Die** by James Patterson. I had read a couple of the Alex Delaware novels which I thought were pretty good. Then…I came across this pile of dreck in a youth hostel somewhere and proceeded to read. This is the kind of shit that is produced when some male author wants to write a novel told from the perspective of some kind of “strong female” archetype. It is ludicrous to believe that a strong, independent, and intelligent woman would act like any of the women he portrays in this book. Stupid premise, stupid characters, stupid villain, stupid plot, and a stupid, vapid, moronic ending. Each of these books sucked, sucked, sucked, and then…when you thought they couldn’t suck anymore…they sucked some more. In fact, they are still sucking while you read this and will continue to suck as long as there are people who will unknowingly pick up a book from a hostel bookcase and think - Hey, at least its free. ---
**Author:** ![dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorkusmalorkusmafia/32/7266_2.png) [@dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorkusmalorkusmafia)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/67 "2002-10-25T21:10:31Z")
I had to think about this for a bit. I have thrown two books across the room because they were just bad. Book four or five (I can’t remember anymore) of Robert Jordan’s _Wheel of Time Series_ and _Master of the Five Magics_ by an author I can’t remember. I absolutely loathe Robert Jordan. He can’t wind up a plot at all and it makes everything even more frustrating for the reader. I had a friend burn _Master of the Fiver Magics_ just because setting fires can be cool sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/68 "2002-10-25T21:31:21Z")
“The Last Time They Met” by Anita Shreve. I got to the end, which had a twist, and I thought “WHAT?” and I did, indeed, literally throw it to the ground. I had a similar reaction to “Suzanne’s Diary for Nicholas” by Jammes Patterson except I didn’t bother to finish it. I was worried about projectile vomiting if I read one more word. I once picked up a Dean Koontz book to see why my then-boyfriend liked him so much. I don’t recall the title, but I understand it doesn’t matter. It was awful. ---
**Author:** ![FisherQueen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@FisherQueen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FisherQueen)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/69 "2002-10-25T23:44:54Z")
[QUOTE] \*Originally posted by Arden Ranger \* \*\ ***The Witching Hour** by Anne Rice. After getting through 980 pages or so, the ending of the book just pissed me off no end. That’s the only book I recall throwing across the room. QUOTE] What a funny coincidence. This is the book I was going to write about, too. I didn’t make it to the end. I got progressively more annoyed, and then when she got to the line about how every woman secretly wants to be raped, I didn’t even finish the sentence. In fact, I haven’t read a new Anne Rice book since. ---
**Author:** ![quarx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/50afbb/32.png) [@quarx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quarx)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/70 "2002-10-25T23:49:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ol’Gaffer \* > \*\* Did you get to the part where he goes out to the desert to some new-age dude ranch and the rock talks to him? Goddamn. \*\* Oh, yeah, I suffered through the whole thing. I especially like how he puts down Richard Feynman at the very end while denigrating empiricism. This is after he badmouths his dead father, commits plagiarism, whines about how awful Harvard is,and generally shows off his overall ignorance of anything more complicated than writing a catchy story. [Peter Cook]What a little turd![/Peter Cook] ---
**Author:** ![djbdjb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@djbdjb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/djbdjb)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2002, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/71 "2002-10-26T22:58:34Z")
**Triton** by Samuel R.Delaney. I read it 20 years ago, maybe I could get something more out of it now. ---
**Author:** ![AndrewL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@AndrewL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AndrewL)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/72 "2002-10-27T01:22:50Z")
**Alpha Centauri** by two talentless hacks whose names I cannot recall. Dreary science fiction story with lots of bizarre and utterly unerotic sex scenes. Evolutionarily implausible aliens. A completely dismal, depressing ending. I ended up tossing this book in the trash - and I never throw away books. Didn’t want to give it to a used book store for fear someone else might read it. ---
**Author:** ![Grelby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a5b964/32.png) [@Grelby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grelby)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/73 "2002-10-27T03:12:10Z")
**Wheel of Time** , by the great talentless hack of talentless hacks, Robert Jordan. My sibs all tell me what a fool I am for not loving it, but I think it has less to do with being a fool and more to do with recognizing early that IT’S NOT THAT GOOD. If you can’t wrap up a plot after 9 books and an average of about 7000 pages, the truth is pretty clear: you suck. But I didn’t throw it cause it was falling apart and my sister would have killed me. ---
**Author:** ![elephant\_shoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c77e96/32.png) [@elephant\_shoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elephant_shoes)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/74 "2002-10-27T03:36:13Z")
I threw **Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus** at my soon-to-be ex-boyfriend, who was standing across the room… if that counts. It missed him, and knocked over the fan next to him. Busted it. Rotten book. Rotten boyfriend. But I sure do miss that fan. ---
**Author:** ![Daikona](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8baadc/32.png) [@Daikona](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daikona)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/75 "2002-10-27T04:12:03Z")
I have thrown Salvatore’s Dark Elf trilogy across the room more times than I can count, and for some reason keep picking it up and going back to reading it… The first time I read it was years ago, and I liked it then. I think the problem now is that I know the setting it’s supposed to be taking place in. I swear, that man pulls so many things out of his ass it’s a wonder he isn’t hollow. Add to that the fact that he writes sentences longer than some people write paragraphs, and the fact that the main character makes me twitch, and it’s all a jolly good time! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Naz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e99b99/32.png) [@Naz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Naz)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/76 "2002-10-27T06:33:07Z")
I second the nominations of **Frankenstein** , **The Vampire Armand** , and **Queen of the Damned**. All dreary, horrible piles of steaming garbage. For my own satisfaction, I nominate **The Great Gatsby**. I flipped pages until I reached the end of the book, but I still have no idea what it was about or what the point of the whole book was. Oh well, at least I didn’t actually read the thing well enough to remember it. Its saving grace. In general, is it just me, or does Piers Anthony’s _Incarnations of Immortality_ have some disturbing things in them? The one with the old judge who falls in love with this extremely young woman? It wasn’t the main point of the story, as I recall, but when the girl spends time in Purgatory, and finds that one day there equals one year on Earth, and uses it to make herself legal, I got worried about ol’ Piers. Same for the one with two women working together on some sort of obstacle mountain. One turns into a man and basically rapes the other. Wrong. Very wrong. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 9:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/77 "2002-10-27T09:21:51Z")
A friend had given me a few books, including a book about “infinity” by Isaac Asimov. When I finished that book I was furious. I was working as a security guard, at a school office building with a large parking lot outside the entrance. I stood in the lot and tossed the book straight up a few times, in the manner of a grad tossing his mortarboard. When the book was sufficiently battered I quietly threw it into a trash barrel outside the doors. I had a better idea, but the management at my mobile-home park–and the Gardena Police–would frown on me tossing the book into our trash dumpster, followed by a lighted match. And I _like_ some of Asimov’s books. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![nefertari](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7bcc69/32.png) [@nefertari](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nefertari)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 10:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/78 "2002-10-27T10:49:27Z")
\>\>THe Witching Hour Ann Rice Thank goodness, I thought I was the only one. I hated this. Can’t stand it, can’t finish it. That lead girl is so insipid and bland, pleh. I must admit, I love the Vampire Chronicles though. Tropic of Cancer by Mr Miller also bugs me. I just can’t get into it. nefertari ---
**Author:** ![KarlGrenze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@KarlGrenze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGrenze)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515/79 "2002-10-27T13:19:01Z")
I liked The Witching Hour, but I’m curious… I read the next two books in the series, and I didn’t like it, especially the last one. I thought that book went against everything the first book had done. So…anyone that suffered thru The Witching Hour that also suffered thru the others has any comments? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/books-you-threw-across-the-room-maybe-spoilers/133515.md?page=3)