# Bought a set of buttplugs today **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 4, 2015, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378 "2015-12-04T03:25:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Profdriver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/71e660/32.png) [@Profdriver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Profdriver)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/1 "2015-12-04T03:25:03Z")
Got myself a nice set of decent sized buttplugs in getting ready for the Bernie/Hillary administration. Havent had much luck with the ladies lately but at least my govt will be there to f\*ck me each day. Just forgot to grab some lube… ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/2 "2015-12-04T03:39:00Z")
I’d suggest you not post drunk, but I’m not sure that would help. ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/3 "2015-12-04T03:47:45Z")
Rants belong in The BBQ Pit, not in Elections. Off you go. ---
**Author:** ![Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b487fb/32.png) [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walken_After_Midnight)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/4 "2015-12-04T03:48:15Z")
At least it’s not a [Donald Trump buttplug](https://flavorwire.files.wordpress.com/2015/07/01-3.jpg?w=625&h=465&crop=1) - that quiff looks as if it’d really hurt. If I _had_ to make a choice, it’d be Hillary Clinton up my bumhole every day of the week. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/5 "2015-12-04T03:58:32Z")
How about some of _these_ babies: [http://divine-interventions.com/religioustoys.php](http://divine-interventions.com/religioustoys.php) (NSFW) ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/6 "2015-12-04T04:05:36Z")
Remember William F. Buckley? Russell Kirk? A guy called Ike? I miss the days when Conservatism had some manners. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/7 "2015-12-04T04:34:22Z")
> [@Profdriver](#): > > Havent had much luck with the ladies lately A charmer like you? Shocking. But I can be charitable and assume this thread was an attempt at humour. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/8 "2015-12-04T04:53:07Z")
Ya know the one about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a slide rule. ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/9 "2015-12-04T05:05:46Z")
Hmmmm…not a NEW join date. Color me wrong. Also. If you title a thread like that, have the common goddamn decency to have ACTUALLY purchased and reviewed a set of buttplugs. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/10 "2015-12-04T05:08:38Z")
> [@Financial assistance for young students](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/financial-assistance-for-young-students/730901/1): > > Hello I just leased a 1 bedroom and have no family etc. I am living in Las Vegas and am working full time and going to school full time. I was told to get involved with any financial aid programs I am eligible for, wether it’s social security or FAFSA, etc. I got my FAFSA, but I am not going to be able to make ends meet, just barely. What are some programs I can sign up for to get aid with housing, food, school, etc wether it’s through the govt, a grant, a loan, etc > [@Grants and other financial aid?](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/grants-and-other-financial-aid/733716/1): > > Hey, I had a tramatic brain injury last year and was wondering where to go for financial assistance and other awards for school and rent money? > [@STDs the next day ?](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stds-the-next-day/726031/1): > > I had unprotected sex with this girl last night and today I’ve had two chills and I’m tired do I have HIV? She said she wasn’t a hoe and got pissed when I asked if she had anything, she said she didn’t sleep around but loved sucking d\*\*k. What should I do? > > Serious replies only, not a troll thread > [@Profdriver](#): > > Got myself a nice set of decent sized buttplugs in getting ready for the Bernie/Hillary administration. Havent had much luck with the ladies lately but at least my govt will be there to f\*ck me each day. Just forgot to grab some lube… So you think there will be more financial assistance, medical insurance, and HIV treatment programs under a Republican administration? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/11 "2015-12-04T05:10:04Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > So you think there will be more financial assistance, medical insurance, and HIV treatment programs under a Republican administration? Well, there will probably be fewer available condoms if he wants more unprotected sex… ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/12 "2015-12-04T05:15:18Z")
> [@Sicks\_Ate](#): > > Hmmmm…not a NEW join date. Color me wrong. > > Also. If you title a thread like that, have the common goddamn decency to have ACTUALLY purchased and reviewed a set of buttplugs. He did write a review and then for some reason decided to sit on it. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/13 "2015-12-04T05:19:35Z")
Why does the OP need to buy a new set of buttplugs? Can’t he just use the ones he bought back in 1976 for Jimmy Carter, 1992 for Bill Clinton, or 2008 for Barack Obama? Maybe the OP needs to admit this has nothing to do with politics. He just likes hanging around gay sex shops. ---
**Author:** ![WF\_Tomba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d9b06d/32.png) [@WF\_Tomba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WF_Tomba)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/14 "2015-12-04T05:25:08Z")
I, too, was really looking forward to reading a rant about an actual bad experience with butt plugs. Instead, it’s some tired political joke. Very disappointing. On behalf of everyone here, I **demand** that you buy a set of butt plugs, fuck yourself in the ass with them, and report the experience here forthwith. ---
**Author:** ![Duckster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duckster/32/1244_2.png) [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/15 "2015-12-04T05:26:05Z")
Since the OP is a student with limited financial means, he needs keep expenses down. Food can be expensive. Stick to a beans and broccoli diet. Both are healthy for you. Plus, you can probably make some extra cash farting buttplugs at the local bar darts tournaments, or at construction sites breaking up rocks and old concrete. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/16 "2015-12-04T05:26:21Z")
I’m not sure why the OP needs buttplugs if he’s going to be anally fucked by government. How much can you fit up there?!? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/17 "2015-12-04T05:42:13Z")
Well he DID say he had a traumatic brain injury. ---
**Author:** ![septimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/septimus/32/410_2.png) [@septimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/septimus)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/18 "2015-12-04T05:52:35Z")
nm ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/19 "2015-12-04T05:54:12Z")
> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#): > > I’m not sure why the OP needs buttplugs if he’s going to be anally fucked by government. How much can you fit up there?!? Asshole that big - the sky’s the limit! ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378/20 "2015-12-04T06:09:38Z")
So, Satan’s talking to the new guy, reassuring. “Nah, that’s all a bunch of made up shit. Listen, you like drugs?” “Yeah, sure, lots of 'em!” “Well, OK, Monday is drug day, the works, the whole list, all day, no OD’s, no bring downs.” “Wow! Cool!” “Tuesday is gluttony day, everything to eat, never full, always more! By the by, are you gay?” “No, no I’m not.” “Oh. Well, you’re not much gonna like Friday”. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bought-a-set-of-buttplugs-today/739378.md?page=2)