# Boy marries cow. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 16, 2010, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440 "2010-06-16T17:33:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/41 "2010-06-17T19:39:50Z")
We shouldn’t judge their dairy culture. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/42 "2010-06-17T19:49:07Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > Well, it seems he was horny, at the very least… [Ahem](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=12583720&postcount=17) :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/43 "2010-06-17T20:53:49Z")
Ah, the classic love story. Boy meets cow. Boy loses cow. Boy runs out of milk so finds cow again and gets married. ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/44 "2010-06-18T05:00:38Z")
Apparently he couldn’t get the milk for free. ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/45 "2010-06-18T13:11:58Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > Well, if it was in India they certainly wouldn’t have drowned the cow. Just what would be the penalty for sex with a sacred animal? > > Interesting Factoid > > The Talmud also calls for the killing of any animal involved in bestiality. The reasoning is that others may think ‘If he screwed that goat, it must be something special.’ and be tempted. The Talmud would also have the person executed, right? I know Torah calls for the execution of both but doesn’t have the added reasoning. ---
**Author:** ![6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/6/e19adc/32.png) [@6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/46 "2010-06-18T15:11:09Z")
This is no joke. I too have been the victim of a flirty cow. Those eyes. Those lashes. She played the piccolo bovinely. We could have been happy. It still haunts me. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/47 "2010-06-18T15:30:37Z")
> [@6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](#): > > This is no joke. I too have been the victim of a flirty cow. Those eyes. Those lashes. She played the piccolo bovinely. We could have been happy. > > It still haunts me. Did she have nice teats? ---
**Author:** ![6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/6/e19adc/32.png) [@6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/48 "2010-06-18T15:46:55Z")
> [@VunderBob](#): > > Did she have nice teats? Not really. But that was my only beef. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/49 "2010-06-18T16:35:22Z")
> [@6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](#): > > Not really. But that was my only beef. You’re going to milk this for every bad pun you ca… dammit. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/50 "2010-06-18T18:37:39Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > You’re going to milk this for every bad pun you ca… > > dammit. Yes they are. We’ve herd them all before. ---
**Author:** ![Perciful](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b38774/32.png) [@Perciful](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Perciful)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/51 "2010-06-18T21:47:40Z")
> [@FriarTed](#): > > The Talmud would also have the person executed, right? I know Torah calls for the execution of both but doesn’t have the added reasoning. My question is once they drown the cow do they get to eat it? Lots of nice steaks and tenderloins on a cow. I had to read the headlines in The Jakarta News and it seems they want to ban pornography on the internet. So pornography is bad but screwing a cow is front page news? Very confusing? Go screw a cow but don’t look at naked chicks? ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/52 "2010-06-18T22:02:20Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > How, now? Drowned cow! :eek: Why oh why did I read this? - I’m really tired (not enough sleep this week) and I can’t… stop… laugh. iinng! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/53 "2010-06-19T00:16:11Z")
> [@Perciful](#): > > My question is once they drown the cow do they get to eat it? From a Jewish standpoint, and I must hurry, it’s getting dark, it would be a safe bet that the animal is no longer Kosher. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/54 "2010-06-19T00:21:48Z")
I always knew that comic strip would go too far. ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/55 "2010-06-19T00:54:51Z")
Cud you guys please stop. We’re Hereford better things than this. ---
**Author:** ![6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/6/e19adc/32.png) [@6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/56 "2010-06-19T01:25:39Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > You’re going to milk this for every bad pun you ca… > > dammit. I know. I do believe I deserve a pat on the back, even if it’s cheesy and stomach stomach stomach turning, ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/57 "2010-06-19T01:42:39Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > They take [bestiality](http://www.thejakartaglobe.com/national/teenager-passes-out-marrying-cow-he-had-sex-with/380095) seriously in Jakarta. The story itself is from the island of Bali, not from Jakarta. While Indonesia is Muslim, Bali is predominantly Hindu. Could help explain any over-the-top bovine wackiness. I’m not saying the boy _didn’t_ marry the cow. But I’ve never even heard of the _Jakarta Globe_. Possibly some sort of tabloid? _The Jakarta Post_ is the standard English-language rag there; I’d be more ready to believe it if it ran in there. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/58 "2010-06-19T01:54:23Z")
I’d also like to add that if God had not intended Man to have sex with cows, He would not have invented West Texas. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/59 "2010-06-19T02:05:10Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I’d also like to add that if God had not intended Man to have sex with cows, He would not have invented West Texas. Dammit, Sam! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/6/e19adc/32.png) [@6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440/60 "2010-06-19T02:18:21Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I’d also like to add that if God had not intended Man to have sex with cows, He would not have invented West Texas. If God had not intended Man to have sex with cows, He would not have invented my sister-in-law or her silly old moo of a mother. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boy-marries-cow/543440.md?page=4)