# Boycott and Fuck any commercial that promotes shitass customer behavior **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 5, 2008, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362 "2008-02-05T06:32:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/1 "2008-02-05T06:32:29Z")
FUCK. Right when I think that my embrace of generous living and a mix of the best aspects of buddhism and dianetics is helping me be a less angry person, a commercial like this new one comes on. Basically what happens is that this GARBAGE CUNT goes to get her birth control but then freaks out when the pharmacist explains to her that she’ll need a routine blood test to monitor her potassium levels (this is something her doctor, or the Eugenics officer at the abortion clinic she visited should have explained to her, not the pharmacist). Her toilet hole friend sneers "_I_ don’t need to take a blood test for \*my \* birth control. [you need a blood test to diagnose your hep-C, you fucking bitch!], at which point our piece of shit, piss-gargling and come-farting protagonatrix _dismissively thrusts the bag of medicine back towards the pharmacist and walks away rolling her eyes_. Let me direct part 2: she then goes, along with her friend, to an all-anal gangbang where she’s quadruple-penetrated and shit-bukkaked until she’s numb to the sorrow of existence. She needs a blood test to diagnose the hep-C, HIV, and HPV that she’s contracted over her years of being an entitled, dismissive whore who uses birth control because she thinks it prevents HIV and STD’s (there has to be SOME reason for those INSIPID warnings) and then the Pharmacist turns out to have been directing everything all along, _Eyes Wide Shut_ or Jodorowsky style. PULL BACK THE CAMERA - REALITY IS YOURS NOW. Only he slashes her throat and uses her blood to perform a Lovecraftian midnight mass to raise the ghost of Cappio and Crystal Pepsi. Seriously, FUCK any company that has their customers acting like abusive pieces of shit toward employees. Fuck Whopper Freakout - I almost voluntarily checked myself into a mental institution when I saw a commercial promoting SCREAMING at Burger King employees because I was so afraid I was going to go wait outside the local Burger King and start butchering the customers. GET ME A WHOPPER - GOD, that clip that plays at the end of each commercial, an adult-baby mental patient DEMANDING, because DEMANDING is what gets you SERVICE. It’s not too late to undo this culture of abuse and trantrum in the retail environment. Start by boycotting companies that promote and reward such behavior. ---
**Author:** ![nameless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/779978/32.png) [@nameless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nameless)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/2 "2008-02-05T06:40:01Z")
Per the advice in your title, I will henceforth not purchase nor have sexual intercourse with any commercials that advocate the aforementioned behavior. Thanks, whatever your name is! ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/3 "2008-02-05T06:42:44Z")
Garth, take your Ritalin, man. ---
**Author:** ![askeptic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@askeptic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/askeptic)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/4 "2008-02-05T06:43:25Z")
Dude, get rid of your television for your sake, get rid of your computer for ours… ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/5 "2008-02-05T06:52:21Z")
Dianetics? Really? ---
**Author:** ![nameless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/779978/32.png) [@nameless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nameless)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/6 "2008-02-05T06:59:24Z")
[QUOTE=Diogenes the Cynic] Dianetics? Really? [/QUOTE] I was wondering that too. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/7 "2008-02-05T07:07:00Z")
**TLDRWTFKTHXBAIOMGBBQILOLDHALISAIISFYPIANALPEBKACRTFMSTFUORLY** , your dianetics etc. may not be making you less angry, but it’s definitely making you more creative. I applaud your Pitting. OTOH, I gotta say, I wasn’t fucking too many commercials _before_ I read it. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/8 "2008-02-05T07:23:55Z")
> [@](#): > > Only he slashes her throat and uses her blood to perform a Lovecraftian midnight mass I hope he tests it for Hep C first. I hate those ritual murder-transmitted diseases. ---
**Author:** ![Mellivora\_capensis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mellivora\_capensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mellivora_capensis)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/9 "2008-02-05T07:30:42Z")
You know, mostly I don’t share or even understand **TPPKAVCO3** ’s views, but I can actually get behind the principle of this rant. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/10 "2008-02-05T07:35:00Z")
Hmm. I never got tested for Hep C or any STI at all when I went on birth control pills. Maybe I _am_ the garbage cunt from the ad! Let’s see if I’ll arise the OP’s rage. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/11 "2008-02-05T07:52:29Z")
And I don’t think anyone’s checked my potassium in years. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/12 "2008-02-05T07:57:48Z")
Wait, what commercial? ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/13 "2008-02-05T08:08:14Z")
This is hilarious. ---
**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 8:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/14 "2008-02-05T08:30:54Z")
Abusing the worker? You must be the most fragile little cookie in the jar. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 8:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/15 "2008-02-05T08:45:14Z")
I’ll consider myself sternly warned and admonished. Warned against what, I haven’t a bleeding clue, but whatever it is I have to avoid doing, I know it’s serious and urgent. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 8:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/16 "2008-02-05T08:47:43Z")
Whole lot of crazy going on in that OP. ---
**Author:** ![TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 8:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/17 "2008-02-05T08:54:13Z")
Why is this the only commercial in the world that’s not on youtube!? That fucking baby vomiting all over himself is on the front page! ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/18 "2008-02-05T11:33:47Z")
I think bananas have potassium. ---
**Author:** ![Fiveroptic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fiveroptic/32/8257_2.png) [@Fiveroptic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiveroptic)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/19 "2008-02-05T11:47:07Z")
Bananas _should_ have potassium, but have them checked first just to be safe. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2008, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362/20 "2008-02-05T11:48:15Z")
I don’t really like tennis. Is this about tennis? OK, football then. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boycott-and-fuck-any-commercial-that-promotes-shitass-customer-behavior/436362.md?page=2)