# Boyo Jim, as per your request. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 22, 2007, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474 "2007-08-22T07:00:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2007, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/41 "2007-08-22T22:01:12Z")
“best of the worst” as a member title? ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2007, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/42 "2007-08-22T23:04:45Z")
[QUOTE=magellan01] Maybe they simply see the world differently than you and feel that it is an honorable thing to serve their country at this time. Maybe they’ve weighed all the “facts” as you see them and came to a different assessment for themselves. But, I guess in your book that means they fall somewhere on the continuum between “batshit insane” and “dupes”. [/QUOTE] My post was not directed at kids who want to join up. My post was directed at parents who would push their children to enlist in the military, during a time of unjust war, as a means of instilling some kind of discipline that they themselves have failed to instill. That is crazy IMHO. > [@](#): > > Don’t you think that has to be assessed on a case by case basis? I mean, who the hell are you to make a blanket statement about what is right for thousands of kids you’ve never met? For them choosing an option that has proven beneficial for hundreds and hundreds of thousands of people. Or for the thousands of parents who know their kids and determine that the military would be **better** for them than the life they are currently leading? I am an American citizen, and have the right to express any damn opinion I want. As do you. And lets see, in a few years, how many veterans feel they have benefitted from their tour in Iraq. > [@](#): > > Of course you missed the reason for this thread in your honor: it had to do with the _appropriateness_ of your post in that other thread, not your stance on the military or Iraq. Could you have NOT voiced your opinion that the military is not a good option without pissing on those curretnly serving? Seriously. Would that have been an impossibility for you? Or do you have Der Trihs Syndrome, and any time the thought of our young people serving in Iraq crosses your brain you reflexively simply must piss? People were posting all kinds of advice. I posted mine. I could be accepted or not by the OP. It was in the Pit. The Pit is a free-for-all. I posted what I thought. As I will continue to do, as as you should too. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2007, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/43 "2007-08-22T23:41:08Z")
[QUOTE=wring] “best of the worst” as a member title? [/QUOTE] Check out this [thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=430953) - all will be explained. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2007, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/44 "2007-08-22T23:55:20Z")
thanks. that’s cool. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/45 "2007-08-23T00:06:47Z")
**Mama Tiger** and **D\_Odds** you guys rock, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![magellan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@magellan01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magellan01)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/46 "2007-08-23T01:40:35Z")
I’ve made my point to the subject of this thread. I think we understand where the other is coming from. Though I still think he misses the point of this thread—appropriateness—I have given him the last word and request that this thread be closed whenever a Mod gets around to it. Thank you. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/47 "2007-08-23T02:14:56Z")
[QUOTE=magellan01] I’ve made my point to the subject of this thread. I think we understand where the other is coming from. Though I still think he misses the point of this thread—appropriateness—I have given him the last word and request that this thread be closed whenever a Mod gets around to it. Thank you. [/QUOTE] I appreciate your civility, although we disagree. Tea? ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/48 "2007-08-23T04:38:55Z")
If one believes the U.S. occupation of Iraq is wildly immoral, then one will see the advocation of sending your own kids over there as immoral as well. Forget his personal safety, whether its his life, limb, or mental well being (which can be deeply disturbing and surprisingly common, as recent reports indicate). Think about the support of the machinery and infrastructure which is currently in Iraq. Think about the suffering it inflicts. Why in the world would you want to be a part of that if you think the occupation is immoral? There have to be better ways to sort out a trouble youth than using him in as a cog in a machine of conquest. If you don’t have such views of the current situation in Iraq, well, that’s a different story then, obviously. But it’s pretty easily understandable. ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/49 "2007-08-23T04:53:35Z")
You know, the typos are always invisible to me until the five minutes is up. It’s funny how that works. ---
**Author:** ![magellan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@magellan01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magellan01)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/50 "2007-08-23T04:55:52Z")
[QUOTE=marshmallow] If one believes the U.S. occupation of Iraq is wildly immoral, then one will see the advocation of sending your own kids over there as immoral as well. Forget his personal safety, whether its his life, limb, or mental well being (which can be deeply disturbing and surprisingly common, as recent reports indicate). Think about the support of the machinery and infrastructure which is currently in Iraq. Think about the suffering it inflicts. Why in the world would you want to be a part of that if you think the occupation is immoral? There have to be better ways to sort out a trouble youth than using him in as a cog in a machine of conquest. If you don’t have such views of the current situation in Iraq, well, that’s a different story then, obviously. But it’s pretty easily understandable. [/QUOTE] And you, too, seem to have missed the point. No matter, though. Perhaps you’d care to join **Boyo Jim** and I for some tea. I’ll bring scones. **Jim** , thanks for the participation. Again, a Mod can close this at his, or her, convenience. Hey, by the way, are any of the Mods female? ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/51 "2007-08-23T06:58:23Z")
> [@](#): > > **magellan01** : …Or for the thousands of parents who know their kids and determine that the military would be better for them than the life they are currently leading? I can not think of _any_ circumstance under which this would be appropriate behavior for a parent. The military is for adults only. Parents have no business determining what lives their adult children should be leading. They may encourage them, offer suggestions, limit their options and so forth. But they must not determine the only direction. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 9:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/52 "2007-08-23T09:59:58Z")
IIRC, I met Gaudere at a Chi Dope and she is female. Ditto with TVeblen, who retired last year from being a mod. Tubadiva is a female administrator. Those are the only ones I have personal knowledge about. ---
**Author:** ![GomiBoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b2d939/32.png) [@GomiBoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GomiBoy)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 10:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/53 "2007-08-23T10:27:15Z")
[QUOTE=Zoe] I can not think of _any_ circumstance under which this would be appropriate behavior for a parent. The military is for adults only. Parents have no business determining what lives their adult children should be leading. They may encourage them, offer suggestions, limit their options and so forth. But they must not determine the only direction. [/QUOTE] Are you only speaking of the legality of such guidance, or the reality? Lots of parents determine one way or another what their ‘adult’ children do, usually through offering (or witholding) financial support for a desired outcome. Parents decide what college their child attends, what their child may study, whether their child may join the military or not. Legally you’re correct, but just because a child turns 18 doesn’t mean it’s automatically morally ‘hands off’ of that child for ever more. Personal anecdote - I joined when I was 18 over my parents’ strong objection (USAF). I loved it, had a great time, then came home and had no earthly idea what to do next. My dad, whom I thought I hated when I was \<21, turned out to be one of the smartest, wisest people I knew - he told me I would go to school in in Portland, OR, in computers, and offered his support (financial and otherwise) for this, but told me if I stuck around my home town working shite jobs and going out to bars 4 nights a week I would get nothing from him. Best decision ever, and I am benefitting from this decision made on my behalf to this day. I still miss him - he died the next year and never got to see the outcome of his decision. I hope he would be proud of me. Legally - he couldn’t tell me anything. I could have stayed in my small home down and drank away my paychecks and lived that way forever. Realistically, he could tell me what I was going to do, by offering financial support to do it. And because I respected him enough to listen at least a little bit, this determination of his was what I chose to do. ---
**Author:** ![magellan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@magellan01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magellan01)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/54 "2007-08-23T16:35:27Z")
[QUOTE=Zoe] I can not think of _any_ circumstance under which this would be appropriate behavior for a parent. The military is for adults only. Parents have no business determining what lives their adult children should be leading. They may encourage them, offer suggestions, limit their options and so forth. But they must not determine the only direction. [/QUOTE] You may want to check Post 38, for context. I was responding. “Push” as in “strongly encourage”. Unless I’m not remembering where I wrote "tie them up, forge their signatures, driver them down to Parris Island and dump them. Also, parents have every right—I’d say they have the responsibility—to **help** deteirmine the lives their children should leave. And if a kid has demonstrated good judgement throughout his teen years, parents can, and should give him a longer leash and be more of a spectator as he makes further choices. Guiding him when needed or asked. If on the other hand, a teen has demonstrated poor judgement as far as his behavior and may be continuing to limit his options because of it, it is incumbent upon a parent to be more involved, to be more of an “pilot” as to what the kid should be doing next. Basically, I have no idea to what your objecting to, as I don’t think you’d disagree with the above. Am I wrong? ---
**Author:** ![kidchameleon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/898d66/32.png) [@kidchameleon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidchameleon)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/55 "2007-08-23T18:14:08Z")
[QUOTE=Boyo Jim] I’m not sure whether this is addressed to me, but none of my posts have claimed that. [/QUOTE] Perhaps ‘meatgrinder’ might not have been the best of terms to use in that case. When I was growing up a schoolmate of mine refused to believe that my dad had been in Vietnam (in the Navy) because according to him ‘everyone who went over there at least lost a finger’. Sometimes I wonder about the strange impressions people get of military service. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Composer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/898d66/32.png) [@The\_Composer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Composer)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/56 "2007-08-23T19:28:27Z")
[QUOTE=magellan01] Hey, by the way, are any of the Mods female? [/QUOTE] **fluiddruid** is female, too, and **Lynn Bodoni**. ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/57 "2007-08-23T19:31:12Z")
[QUOTE=Kricket] … This kind of reminds me of that Pauly Shore movie… [/QUOTE] Damn, the horror of war brought home. ---
**Author:** ![magellan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@magellan01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magellan01)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2007, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474/58 "2007-08-23T19:36:36Z")
[QUOTE=kidchameleon] [Quote=Boyo Jim] I’m not sure whether this is addressed to me, but none of my posts have claimed that. [/QUOTE] Perhaps ‘meatgrinder’ might not have been the best of terms to use in that case. [/QUOTE] I’m pretty sure the claim was from **DigitalC** , as you can see in the OP. If, in fact, that is what is being referred to. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/boyo-jim-as-per-your-request/416474.md?page=2)