# "Brain and Brain! What IS brain?!?" or What's your favorite line of BAD dialogue? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 11, 2004, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676 "2004-10-11T17:59:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/1 "2004-10-11T17:59:33Z")
What’s your favorite line of BAD dialogue? From **Flash Gordon** : “No father! Not the boar-worms!!!” From **Mommie Dearest** : “I’m not mad at you, I’m mad at the _dirt_.” and “Because I am **NOT** one of your faaaaaaaannnnnnssssssss!!!” From “Love Story”: Oh hell, the whole movie is nothing but bad dialogue but - “Love means never having to say you’re sorry!” (Tell that to your SO.) ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/2 "2004-10-11T18:25:00Z")
From **Star Crash** : “Imperial Battleship … stop the flow of time!” ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/3 "2004-10-11T18:38:13Z")
From “Night of the Creeps”: Police detective is in the sorority house, while zombies are invading campus. Bus full of fraternity brothers arrives to take the sorority sisters to the big dance. Detective looks out window: Detective: “I’ve got good news and bad news, girls. The good news is your dates are here.” Sorority sister: “What’s the bad news?” Detective: “They’re dead.” ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/4 "2004-10-11T18:43:11Z")
**Dewey** you made a mistake. This is for _bad_ dialogue. That line is brilliant. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Nader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Darth\_Nader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Nader)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/5 "2004-10-11T19:03:54Z")
“Send more cops” ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/6 "2004-10-11T19:05:04Z")
> [@Art Vandelay](#): > > From “Love Story”: > > Oh hell, the whole movie is nothing but bad dialogue but - > > “Love means never having to say you’re sorry!” “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/7 "2004-10-11T19:33:22Z")
From _Star Trek V:_ “Excuse me . . . why does God need a starship?” ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/8 "2004-10-11T20:05:58Z")
“STILL!!! OLD!!! FRIEND!!!” **Wrath of Kahn** ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/9 "2004-10-11T20:51:00Z")
> [@Art Vandelay](#): > > From **Flash Gordon** : > > “No father! Not the boar-worms!!!” “Flash! Flash! I _love_ you! But we only have fourteen hours to save the Earth!” Was worse. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/10 "2004-10-11T20:57:51Z")
Even worse. Jeanne Moreau, I think from the movie\*\* J’etaime\*\*: “I love you. You make me want to puke.” ---
**Author:** ![RikWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/49beb7/32.png) [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/11 "2004-10-11T21:44:28Z")
> [@Art Vandelay](#): > > What’s your favorite line of BAD dialogue? > > From **Flash Gordon** : > > “No father! Not the boar-worms!!!” I think it was “bore” worms, as they were known for boring their way into a person. ---
**Author:** ![RikWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/49beb7/32.png) [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2004, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/12 "2004-10-11T21:45:45Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > From _Star Trek V:_ “Excuse me . . . why does God need a starship?” Oh come on! That was a GREAT line! The only good thing in the whole damned movie actually. ---
**Author:** ![Master\_Wang-Ka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/master_wang-ka/32/3325_2.png) [@Master\_Wang-Ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Master_Wang-Ka)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/13 "2004-10-12T00:19:15Z")
Most of the movie “Glen Or Glenda?” as written by Ed Wood Jr. The movie is narrated, and contains some of the most stream-of-consciousness narration ever actually seen onscreen. And that’s not even counting Bela Lugosi’s scenes, which have nothing to do with the movie, and were inserted solely so they could stick Lugosi’s name on the credits… ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/14 "2004-10-12T04:48:07Z")
> [@RikWriter](#): > > Oh come on! That was a GREAT line! The only good thing in the whole damned movie actually. Okay, then the WORST line has to be “I know this ship like the back of mah hand.” **KLONK!** :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Manatee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/50afbb/32.png) [@Manatee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manatee)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/15 "2004-10-12T05:11:48Z")
“They’re down there, trapped in the belly of that iron beast” (or something like that–going from memory). C’mon! _Raiders of the Lost Ark_ showed that Sallah was a competent assistant to Indy, and then _Last Crusade_ gives us THIS?!? What’s next, Sallah? “Oooo! The Nazis are shooting at us with their thunder-sticks!” ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/16 "2004-10-12T05:31:16Z")
From _Manos: Hands Of Fate_: “Well, how do we get out of here?” “There is no way out of here. It will be dark soon. There is no way out of here.” and “The MASTER would not APROOOOOVE!” ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/17 "2004-10-12T06:09:29Z")
> [@](#): > > They’re down there, trapped in the belly of that iron beast" (or something like that–going from memory). > > C’mon! Raiders of the Lost Ark showed that Sallah was a competent assistant to Indy, and then Last Crusade gives us THIS?!? What’s next, Sallah? “Oooo! The Nazis are shooting at us with their thunder-sticks!” Uh, what? It’s hyperbole. The dude knows what a tank is. And this tank was a BEAST of a tank. So what’s the problem? You just too literal? ---
**Author:** ![Leaper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4bbf92/32.png) [@Leaper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaper)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/18 "2004-10-12T06:11:38Z")
> [@Manatee](#): > > “They’re down there, trapped in the belly of that iron beast” (or something like that–going from memory). > > C’mon! _Raiders of the Lost Ark_ showed that Sallah was a competent assistant to Indy, and then _Last Crusade_ gives us THIS?!? What’s next, Sallah? “Oooo! The Nazis are shooting at us with their thunder-sticks!” I thought it was a burst of poeticism? ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/19 "2004-10-12T06:21:19Z")
[The Conqueror](http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0049092/quotes) scoops the pool: \*\*Bortai \*\*: For me, there is no peace while you live, Mongol. \*\*Temujin \*\*: You’re beautiful in your wrath. \*\*Temujin \*\*: She is a woman - much woman. Should her perfidy be less than that of other women? \*\*Temujin \*\*: While I live, while my blood burns hot, your daughter is not safe in her tent. \*\*Temujin \*\*: Come and take me, mongrels - if you dare. While I have fingers to grasp a sword, and eyes to see your cowardly faces, your treacherous heads will not be safe on your shoulders. For I am Temujin, the Conqueror. No prison can hold me, no army defeat me. \*\*Bortai \*\*: The Conqueror? Mighty armies cannot stop him. But one touch of my lips… Yes, he captured me - but he cannot tame me. \*\*Hunlun \*\*: My son has won the world. Still he must conquer that red-headed Jezebel. \*\*Temujin \*\*: I feel this Tartar woman is for me, and my blood says, take her. There are moments for wisdom and moments when I listen to my blood; my blood says, take this Tartar woman. ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2004, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676/20 "2004-10-12T07:28:40Z")
My brother pointed this one out to me. It’s a good line with a stupid line stuck in the middle. When Henry Blake is killed on M_A_S\*H, Radar announces in the O.R.: “Colonel Henry Blake’s plane was shot down over the sea of Japan. The plane spun in. There were no survivors.” In what way does “the plane spun in” contribute to the scene AT ALL? Hmmm, Radar, you forgot to mention the wind speed at the time, and the water temperature. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brain-and-brain-what-is-brain-or-whats-your-favorite-line-of-bad-dialogue/268676.md?page=2)