# Brasil 2014 **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [May 6, 2014, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840 "2014-05-06T21:19:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 68
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1341 "2014-06-23T17:11:54Z")
> [@Cumbrian](#): > > Anyone who says football fans are devoid of wit has not spent a long time with them watching games. Doing a Google search on funny chants turns up some hilarity, such as [this list](http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/west-ham/10692143/Top-10-funniest-football-chants.html) from the Telegraph. I like these: > [@](#): > > _“Your teeth are offside, your teeth are offside, Luis Suarez, your teeth are offside”_ > > Manchester United fans singing about Liverpool forward Luis Suarez’s large gnashers > [@](#): > > _“John Carew, Carew. He likes a lap-dance or two. He might even pay for you. John Carew, Carew”_ > > Sung to the tune of ‘Que Sera Sera’ by Doris Day, this was the Villa fans’ tribute to their player after he was caught visiting a gentlemen’s club in 2008 ---
**Author:** ![Quercus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/7ab992/32.png) [@Quercus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quercus)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1342 "2014-06-23T17:53:28Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > He has to be in front of the ball and in front of the last defender. If somehow two attackers get behind the last defender and one of them has the ball, it’s not offside if he passes to the other guy. That’s not quite right, actually. To be onsides, he has to be in front of the ball (i.e. have the ball between him and the goal he’s attacking) or be in front of or even with two defenders (in practice, the goalkeep is almost always one of those defenders, so he just has to make sure he’s in front of the last field defender). The original sentence in the rulebook is confusing because it’s sort of written backwards, but the general idea is pretty clear: either the ball or two defenders between you and the goal. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1343 "2014-06-23T17:55:01Z")
Group B games are finishing up just about as expected. Spain have taken care of Australia pretty comfortably, and Holland has accounted for Chile. Australia showed today why they are the lowest-ranked team in the World Cup. They really missed Cahill, and they showed little of the vigor they had against Holland last week. Very little movement off the ball in attack, and a pretty uninspiring performance overall. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1344 "2014-06-23T17:55:20Z")
Spain played like World Champions today. Torres looked good and Mata was quite sharp. Pity it came too late. They stuck with old legs too long. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1345 "2014-06-23T17:57:02Z")
> [@AK84](#): > > Spain played like World Champions today. Torres looked good and Mata was quite sharp. Pity it came too late. They stuck with old legs too long. They played pretty well, against inferior opposition that was missing its best player. If you handed them a Free Pass to the second round of the tournament right now, i wouldn’t bet on them against any of the other top teams. ---
**Author:** ![Laggard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de053/32.png) [@Laggard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laggard)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1346 "2014-06-23T17:58:55Z")
My all time favorite chant is “Suarez is a racist da daa daa da. Do do do do do do Racist Bastard!” ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1347 "2014-06-23T18:07:42Z")
Another good thing about the U.S. doing well is that more Americans become curious about soccer, and we Europeans get to explain to you how it works. It’s not that often that we get to feel all superior and school you Yanks about something these days. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Baron\_Greenback](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baron_greenback/32/48_2.png) [@Baron\_Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baron_Greenback)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1348 "2014-06-23T18:08:37Z")
> [@Martian Bigfoot](#): > > Doing a Google search on funny chants turns up some hilarity, such as [this list](http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/west-ham/10692143/Top-10-funniest-football-chants.html) from the Telegraph. From the comments: > [@](#): > > The very best ever the thousand strong toon army late nineties to Evertonian legend turned Sunderland boss peter Reid . Find it On you tube > To the tune of yellow submarine > In the town where I was born > Lived a ma-aN with a monkeys heed > And he went to Sunderland > And his na-ame was peter Reid > (All together now ) > Peter Reid’s got a \*\*\*\*\*\*\*\* monkeys heed > A \*\*\*\*\*\* monkeys heed > A \*\*\*\*\*\* monkeys heed > Peter Reid etc etc . That’s very harsh, but fair. And there’s a reminder of Man U’s fans anthem for their own player, the Korean Park Ji-Sung, to the tune of “Lord of the Dance”. > [@](#): > > "Park, Park wherever you may be, > you eat dogs in your own coun-try. > It could be worse, you could be Scouse, > eating rats in your council house! There’s a sociology thesis to be written about the variants of that song. ---
**Author:** ![nani](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/58956e/32.png) [@nani](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nani)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1349 "2014-06-23T18:19:51Z")
> [@Ximenean](#): > > Hmm, it is close. These images are at the moment the pass is made. The player who receives the pass is at top left. > > [Imgur: The magic of the Internet](http://i.imgur.com/97ecOvi.png) > [Imgur: The magic of the Internet](http://i.imgur.com/Yb3Yaf6.png) > > Remember, it’s any part of the body except the arms that can be offside. I’d say he’s just onside, if you follow the lines on the grass. Ah, that is close. Thanks! Yup, he seems just onside from that. ---
**Author:** ![Laggard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de053/32.png) [@Laggard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laggard)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1350 "2014-06-23T18:20:54Z")
> [@Martian Bigfoot](#): > > Another good thing about the U.S. doing well is that more Americans become curious about soccer, ap Sadly that lasts for about a month. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1351 "2014-06-23T18:31:58Z")
> [@nani](#): > > Ah, that is close. Thanks! Yup, he seems just onside from that. What picture are you looking at? From those links, it’s quite clear Yedlin was at least half a foot onside. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1352 "2014-06-23T18:34:28Z")
Six inches is pretty close in most books. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1353 "2014-06-23T18:35:17Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > Australia showed today why they are the lowest-ranked team in the World Cup. Better than being the _highest_-ranked team \*out \*of it. 😉 You don’t hear much here anymore about English football hooligans, or any other kind either. Have law enforcement and immigration authorities taken care of the problem effectively, or is the subculture still active? ---
**Author:** ![nani](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/58956e/32.png) [@nani](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nani)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1354 "2014-06-23T18:52:19Z")
> [@Knorf](#): > > What picture are you looking at? From those links, it’s quite clear Yedlin was at least half a foot onside. That is close. Also he’s leaning. ---
**Author:** ![Ximenean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/aca169/32.png) [@Ximenean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ximenean)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1355 "2014-06-23T18:55:46Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > You don’t hear much here anymore about English football hooligans, or any other kind either. Have law enforcement and immigration authorities taken care of the problem effectively, or is the subculture still active? Thing of the past, mostly. Whether through smarter policing, or socioeconomic change or whatever, is another topic for that sociology thesis mentioned earlier. Football hooliganism, to the extent that it is still around, is more of an Eastern European thing these days. It wasn’t ever a problem at far flung tournaments anyway, because not enough of them could afford to travel. Last instance of English trouble was in Belgium in 2000, IIRC. ---
**Author:** ![Isosleepy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/isosleepy/32/479_2.png) [@Isosleepy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isosleepy)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1356 "2014-06-23T18:58:16Z")
Any other fans of Holland rather face Mexico than Croatia? ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1357 "2014-06-23T19:07:57Z")
Does Canada have a soccer team? ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1358 "2014-06-23T19:15:06Z")
[Yes, they’re in CONCACAF](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canadian_Soccer_Association#Men), but have not qualified for the World Cup since 1986. ---
**Author:** ![Snarky\_Kong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a183cd/32.png) [@Snarky\_Kong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snarky_Kong)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1359 "2014-06-23T19:16:32Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > Does Canada have a soccer team? Yes. They’re not terribly good. I imagine they’ll get quite a bit better now that they have a couple MLS teams and the associated player development programs. ---
**Author:** ![Laggard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de053/32.png) [@Laggard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laggard)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840/1360 "2014-06-23T20:02:33Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > Does Canada have a soccer team? They won the Gold Cup a few years back. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840.md?page=67) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/brasil-2014/687840.md?page=69)