# Breastfeeding in public- Are you OK with it? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 15, 2010, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333 "2010-06-15T19:07:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/221 "2010-06-18T20:40:09Z")
> [@DianaG](#): > > Neither choosing to work nor choosing not to nurse indicates that one considers parenting a “hobby”. Agreed. And between the “Ew, breastfeeding” and the “How can you NOT breastfeed–you think this infant is a cute toy/hobby?” I’m starting to think you’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t. Either way someone’s going to tell you you’re a horrible mother. Pick the reason for being a bad mom that’s most convenient for you and go with it. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/222 "2010-06-18T20:52:05Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > Agreed. And between the “Ew, breastfeeding” and the “How can you NOT breastfeed–you think this infant is a cute toy/hobby?” I’m starting to think you’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t. Either way someone’s going to tell you you’re a horrible mother. Pick the reason for being a bad mom that’s most convenient for you and go with it. You just hit the nail on the head. And what blows my mind is that a lot of it seems to be done as an effort to justify or validate someone else’s parenting style. Like the cry-it-out issue - that’s great that crying it out works for you (general you, of course). I don’t choose to use it because I haven’t found it to be effective and can’t tolerate that much crying. I’m not saying anything whatsoever about people who do use cry it out. I just choose not to do it. However, no matter how much I say that or how neutral I am, just by making the choice I have, I’m assumed to be judging others and they must in turn judge me. It’s ridiculous. As long as the kid is healthy and happy and well adjusted, I don’t give a rat’s ass how they got that way. Obviously what their parents did worked. ---
**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/223 "2010-06-18T20:57:23Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > Agreed. And between the “Ew, breastfeeding” and the “How can you NOT breastfeed–you think this infant is a cute toy/hobby?” I’m starting to think you’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t. Either way someone’s going to tell you you’re a horrible mother. Pick the reason for being a bad mom that’s most convenient for you and go with it. QFT x 1000 With some states being very short on ob/gyns I have often thought about getting certified to be a nurse midwife. One thing that always gives me pause is the amount of bullshit some people give each other about parenting choices, especially breastfeeding. People need to mind their own business and do what they feel is best for THEIR child. To think that you should have any say-so over what someone else does or that you’re in a position to judge someone about their parenting choices is the height of arrogance and ignorance. ---
**Author:** ![DianaG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ab992/32.png) [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/224 "2010-06-18T20:57:39Z")
> [@overlyverbose](#): > > As long as the kid is healthy and happy and well adjusted, I don’t give a rat’s ass how they got that way. Obviously what their parents did worked. Exactly. And for the record, the vast majority of people turn out (reasonably ;)) happy and healthy and well-adjusted. So do what works for you, and tell anyone who gives you any crap about it to tend to their own children. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2010, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/225 "2010-06-18T21:32:22Z")
Don’t have a problem with it at all - as long as the mother isn’t offended if I should accidentally see anything that’s on display (not that I’ll be staring - but if I accidentally catch a glimpse before I realise what’s going on, I don’t expect to get the evil eye). ---
**Author:** ![burundi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3ec8ea/32.png) [@burundi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burundi)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/226 "2010-06-19T00:56:02Z")
> [@bjbrashier](#): > > I will step, however, back into politically incorrect territory for just a moment, and say that I think raising children is HARD, and not something anyone can really do as a hobby, at least not without serious effects on the child. As such, if two people are holding 2 jobs AND raising a child, that’s 3 jobs between 2 people. I’m of the opinion that one parent should stay home. I work _because_ I love my kid. I want her to have health insurance, not to mention a roof over her head, food in her belly, and shoes on her feet. I keep her picture on my desk and look at it 20 times a day to remind myself of why I’m still at my fucking job. I wish I had the luxury of choosing whether or not to work outside the home. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/227 "2010-06-19T03:08:23Z")
It doesn’t bother me in the least. It actually bothers me less than most adults eating in public (replying to the OP). ---
**Author:** ![Lust4Life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecc23a/32.png) [@Lust4Life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lust4Life)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/228 "2010-06-19T14:01:53Z")
I like looking at tits but watching breast feeding is icky. I’m not offended by it, if a kids got to eat …but I’d prefer not watch if I can help it, and definitely not when I’m eating. ---
**Author:** ![alexandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@alexandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alexandra)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/229 "2010-06-19T14:05:07Z")
Don’t care and I hardly ever see it…couldn’t give a fuck if a woman wants to whip out a naked boob, either. Nursing, and nursing with discretion, may not be the easiest thing to do, particularly if you have big tits or your baby doesn’t like blankets. Don’t really care about discretion…plenty of men seem to think it’s OK to walk around topless on a hot sunny day, so why shouldn’t nursing women be left alone and not judged? ---
**Author:** ![Girl\_From\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3da27b/32.png) [@Girl\_From\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girl_From_Mars)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2010, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/230 "2010-06-20T07:25:42Z")
Wunky’s not come back, but I can only assume that Kim Kardashian is the sort of person in their social set: [Quote=Kim Kardashian via Twitter] EWW Im at lunch,the woman at the table next 2 me is breast feeding her baby w no coverup. [/quote] She further comments on the lady changing the baby on the table (which I can’t approve of), but that’s for a Pit thread… ---
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2010, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/231 "2010-06-21T05:36:15Z")
> [@Drain\_Bead](#): > > Then you’re due for about a billion tiny little wake-up calls in your future. > > Everyone has plans of how it’s gonna be when they have a kid. And then suddenly the kid is here, and even at five minutes old it becomes perfectly evident that they have their own plans that may be in complete conflict with yours. > > I thought I was going to be a lot more crunchy-granola than I turned out to be, and I turned out to be the way I am because I followed my daughter’s lead. We thought we’d co-sleep, but it turns out my daughter can’t sleep unless she’s alone in a room. I thought I’d breastfeed her into toddlerhood, but I always had supply issues and she was done with it when she was 11 months old and got used to the sippy cup. She’s just not that kid of kid. She’s the kid who never once cried when I dropped her off at day care. She’s just got this fiercely independent streak that conflicts with my desire to be a nurturing, touchy-feely mom. So I had to be the one to adapt. > > Plans mean nothing until you’re living the life. Remember that, and your parenthood, when it happens, will be much more sane. My point was that it’s silly to judge other parents for doing what they feel is best for their individual kids when there is no evidence the kids are being harmed. And I don’t see what evidence there is to support that breastfeeding for comfort until a later age is inappropriate or delays emotional maturity. ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2010, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/232 "2010-06-21T07:41:08Z")
Not personally offended. OTOH if you do it conspicuously without a blanket or whatever such that it’s a public spectacle, I reverse the right to _stare_ at the spectacle until it no longer is a novel sight. OTOOH the worser crime is actually to have a baby in a public place of expected maturity and rather than witnessing breastfeeding, one has to try to ignore loud horrible baby wailing. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2010, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333/233 "2010-06-21T13:21:51Z")
> [@LavenderBlue](#): > > Been there done that for two years. > > Thankfully never got even a funny look here in New Jersey. However, I am in favor of discretion whenever possible. Modesty when breastfeeding is ideal. I think Maggie Gyllenhall [took](http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/strollerderby/archive/2007/05/07/maggie-gyllenhaal-nurses-in-public.aspx) (link may not be work safe) it just a bit too far. Huh… I was never the “unbutton from the top” type as in this photo, and there are more discreet ways of doing it (I always lifted my shirt, and any exposure was minimal) but I see nothing wrong with the concept if Mom is comfortable with it. Breastfed 2 kids, one for 2ish years and one for just over one; the toddler rarely (never?) got nursed in public once he was walking, but as babes-in-arms, those kids got fed anyplace I happened to be including at the dentist and podiatrist. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/breastfeeding-in-public-are-you-ok-with-it/543333.md?page=11)