# ...Bring May Glowers (Monthly Mini-Rants) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Tags:** monthly-mini-rant\ **Created:** [May 1, 2025, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737 "2025-05-01T05:11:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/181 "2025-05-14T15:35:32Z")
> [@LurkMeister](#): > > I do have a PayPal account which I hardly ever use, and it does have a link to my checking account, so maybe I’ll try that. Good luck. If I were in your shoes I’d do it just for the principle of the thing, but I wouldn’t blame anyone for not bothering either. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/182 "2025-05-14T16:01:28Z")
> [@LurkMeister](#): > > Micro-rant. I recently got an email reminding me that I was due a settlement on a class-action lawsuit. So I go to the website to see how I can collect my money. It turns out that the only way I can get the money is on a debit card. I’m not sure if I goofed up somehow in requesting it, but the upshot is that I am now the proud owner of a virtual debit card from some place called Prepaid Center, with no idea how to use it. The website tells me that I can add it to my “Wallet”, which I believe is some sort of payment system I could use on my cellphone. I’m an old fart and I don’t use my phone as a wallet. > > Oh, and the amount of the settlement is a magnificent $7.43. In my capacity as an Old Fart, I wish to make a comment here. In my working years I was an IT consultant, project manager, and software architect. And no, “software architect” is not a pretentious term for “programmer”, it means someone who designs the overall structure of large-scale systems so that they’re comprised of modular independent components that are readily maintainable. So I know what a “computer” is. Truly, I do. But in my capacity as an Old Fart, I say that a “wallet” is something that has to be made out of leather (or at least, imitation leather). And a “phone” is something that you talk into and that you can use to communicate with someone else at a distance. The word “telephone” is derived from the Greek “tele”, meaning “far”, and “phone”, meaning “sound” or “voice”. The idea of a “telephone” containing a “wallet” is not a world in which I choose to participate. I appreciate innovation. I have RFID credit and debit cards, but that’s where I draw the line. ETA: OK, OK, I’m being slightly facetious. But only slightly. ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Hedonia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ann_hedonia/32/319_2.png) [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/183 "2025-05-14T16:22:13Z")
> [@LurkMeister](#): > > Hope springs eternal; I once did get a more substantial payment once. And in the past when I’ve gotten settlements there was an option to get it as a direct deposit or an Amazon gift card While most of these class action payments aren’t worth the time it takes to figure it out, I got over $700 in Amazon credits total from two settlements regarding ebook pricing. I buy LOTS of ebooks. ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/184 "2025-05-14T16:27:39Z")
I have been forced by various circumstances to use my phone for purposes other than direct communication. I don’t drive, so I have Uber so I can get rides to places like the airport. I have an app for my bank to I can deposit checks without having to take an Uber to the bank. I have an app that lets me check my heart rate and verify that my a-fib isn’t back (which, thankfully, hasn’t happened in over a year). I steadfastly refuse to install an app that lets me turn my new stove on and off. Oh, and I tried going to PayPal (on my computer) and after adding the debit card to my account the Wallet option refuses to let me transfer money from it. As in, when I click the Wallet option there is no “Transfer money” button as there is supposed to be. ---
**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/185 "2025-05-14T17:05:53Z")
> [@LurkMeister](#): > > I do have a PayPal account which I hardly ever use, and it does have a link to my checking account, so maybe I’ll try that. I get dozens and dozens of SPAM (Scam) emails a day, but one that looked real was from Paypal, saying that the card listed on my account was expiring. The card I had used was a VISA gift card with about $20 left on it. When I needed more in the PayPal, I’d make a deposit in cash at a drugstore. I may have to buy another gift card… but I wonder if this might be one possible answer for you as well. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/186 "2025-05-14T17:33:29Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > The idea of a “telephone” containing a “wallet” is not a world in which I choose to participate. I appreciate innovation. I have RFID credit and debit cards, but that’s where I draw the line. That’s a shame. Those physical cards represent a security risk your phone doesn’t. Granted, using the RFID is safer than swiping, so good for you, but the cards still have all the information on them printed in plain view that anyone can use to make purchases on your behalf. A wallet on a phone doesn’t have your real card number or anything. So it’s a big step up in terms of preventing theft. I’m sure at some point thieves will find a way around those measures but right now they’re pretty safe. As for a phone being multipurpose, if those semantics bother you, just call it what it is. A portable computer that includes the ability to make phone calls. Heck, you could use a smart phone without a phone plan and just enjoy having a tiny computer. Smart phones evolved from PDAs, which truly were little computers. They eventually gained phone capabilities (Handspring Treo and BlackBerry are early examples) and then when the iPhone was released it took over the whole industry and became the standard going forward. When the very first smartphones appeared (I think Handspring had the first) they were awful. I refused to get one. I had a PDA and a flip phone as two different devices. My philosophy was that it was better to have two devices that worked well rather than one device that tried to do the job of both but sucked at it. When the iPhone came out, I changed my stance because it was actually good at both functions. And once you have that, it makes more sense to carry fewer devices around. For the same reason, I carry a multi-tool on me at work because I’m not going to keep an entire set of tools in my pocket. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/187 "2025-05-14T17:44:30Z")
Heck, soup is just a multitool for food. People been creating multi purpose whatevers since forever. I know a lot of us oldsters were inordinately fond of elaborate Swiss Army knives back in the day. My “mobile” is a swiss army knife computer / communicator. It’s even a pretty good tricorder. If only it was a better phaser. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/188 "2025-05-14T17:48:50Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > If you’re going to narrate videos as a job, learn how to pronounce words first. There are some mispronunciations that make me think that a voice was AI produced. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/189 "2025-05-14T17:53:37Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > I know a lot of us oldsters were inordinately fond of elaborate Swiss Army knives back in the day. I carried one until last year. But I found I needed something with stronger pliers for what I do. I still have that knife in a drawer though. I carried it for over 20 years! ---
**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/190 "2025-05-14T18:25:22Z")
Question: I have apparently picked up a flea ( stalker ) and one of the emails which seem to flood my email accidently listed a real email address. I’d like to track that email back to the flea ( and maybe have an attorney or LEO take it from there). Is there a way to do so? Can someone DM me a name or a svc that will do that for me? Thank You…! ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/191 "2025-05-14T19:35:25Z")
Well the plot has thickened with regard to my recently fired boss friend. She created a mess in our donor database where I was tracking grants, so we in fact have not been tracking spenddown. I have to get together with a colleague and painstakingly go through every grant and invoice for the fiscal year. When she first came in she had all this experience with the database, she asked me to make some changes in how we were coding grants. It did not make sense to me but I assumed she knew better and I really did not understand that this would affect spenddown tracking in any way. In essence, she had me assign all grants revenue as fundraising revenue. She then reported my grants revenue as fundraising revenue to the board. She also reported my grant revenue separately. She has been reporting the same revenue twice. This is only one instance where she was reporting based on inflated numbers. There are others. I mean, she really left a huge mess behind. I want to believe this is gross incompetence and not intentional deception. Either way, it sucks to know about someone you’re friends with. We’re getting coffee tomorrow morning. I’m trying to make sure our relationship survives this. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/192 "2025-05-14T19:46:24Z")
Inflating revenue and misstating expenses is often a cover for, or prelude to, embezzling. I don’t know how important this person’s friendship is to you, but if / when the cops do descend on her, I’m not sure you want to be on record as her best buddy still working there _after_ she was fired. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/193 "2025-05-14T21:09:40Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Inflating revenue and misstating expenses is often a cover for, or prelude to, embezzling. No, our finance department (which is an external contracted service) is reporting the correct revenue. She did not control the finances. We have separation of duties for a reason. She was reporting incorrect revenue to the board presumably to make it look like she was more successful than she was at fundraising. She wasn’t very good at it because Executive Leaders called it out more than once. But I wouldn’t put her in charge of a finance department that’s for sure. I have a lot of friends in my various groups but I don’t have too many where I feel like they could be a personal confidant. Like I don’t have anyone besides my Aunt who is a real bestie that lives near here. My former boss and I can talk for hours. She has a kid my son’s age. We’re the same age. And we live less than thirty minutes apart. That’s like lightning in a bottle when you’re 42. There’s just so much I’m questioning about what I thought I saw and what was actually happening. She fired our database manager after nine years of employment because she wouldn’t make the database changes requested of her. I perceived this as a function of my coworker not really understanding the database or being resistant to change. Now I’m left wondering: _what was she asking her to change?_ And what was her motive for changing it? Not only that, but she would tell me, like, so and so employee wants to spend down funds improperly, so I would have to intervene to say, “that’s fraud, actually.” But today that employee was talking to me about it and it sounds like _my boss_ was the one trying to flaut the rules. Down is up. All this shit I thought was other people might in fact have been her all along. We had a Grants Committee meeting today and the level of ease was so much greater now that everyone trusts everyone again. This sucks. ---
**Author:** ![Eric1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3bc359/32.png) [@Eric1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eric1)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/194 "2025-05-14T21:28:54Z")
My God that situation is bad all right. My agency has had some problems of less extent but I’m just as startled reading your story as well. It shouldn’t feel like a person has to consult an attorney while working in a good place like that. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/195 "2025-05-14T21:29:16Z")
It does suck, but if I’m understanding this right, she: - insisted that people aid her in her project to falsify data - reported false data in a professional context - fired someone without real cause - did all of this over a rather extended period - left behind a mess for you and other colleagues to clean up Even a pretty rosy spin on this is not good. I’m not saying don’t be friends, but perhaps do reassess the friendship based on the new data that you have. As Stephen Sondheim said in _Into the Woods_, “Nice is different than good.” ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/196 "2025-05-14T21:36:56Z")
Fell off my bike today. Was slowing down to get off the bike at an intersection to take a pedestrian-only overpass and just ran the front tire onto the side of the curb. Didn’t fall fast, but hard enough. Hands slapped down onto the sidewalk and they are bruised but not really scuffed up, my knee took a bit of a wallop (bruised, swollen and skinned) and that leg is sore from hip to knee. I was looking ahead to a lower section of sidewalk where I tend to get off the bike when I go that way. One person stopped to check on me, claimed he’s done the same thing a few times. I got back up and carried on. I’ll be ok, but wow was that ever humiliating. Just wasn’t paying attention. Hopefully won’t still be sore this weekend, I have plans that will have me on my feet a lot! ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/197 "2025-05-14T21:52:51Z")
> [@Spice\_Weasel](#): > > Down is up. > … > This sucks Yup. I mean this only with respect and your best interests in mind. You’ve said in many threads about your own spectrum-related challenges in reading people and understanding the games behind the games behind the facade. I suspect you have been utterly bamboozled by a friendly-seeming sociopath. Somebody who will hurt you next since they’re otherwise out of people to hurt. Be careful. Be very very careful. I _really_ don’t want to have to post “told you so” 6 months from now. Please. {{Hugs}}. This is a messy situation whether I’m right or I’m dead wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/198 "2025-05-14T22:00:27Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > You’ve said in many threads about your own spectrum-related challenges in reading people and understanding the games behind the games behind the facade. I don’t think I’m on the autism spectrum but I’m probably tragically naive. I don’t understand why people do things like this. So I tend to assume the best intentions of people. It does bite me in the ass occasionally. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/199 "2025-05-14T22:04:56Z")
Sorry to mischaracterize you. Still, be careful, regardless of why. Users _lurve_ naïve victims regardless of why. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737/200 "2025-05-14T22:12:21Z")
I appreciate the warning. My sensors are on high alert for sure. Someone I know suggested I was autistic but I think I pick up too much social nuance to be autistic. I think there’s a difference between not understanding how the game is played and just refusing to play it. Incidentally you get a lot of false positives for autism from people who have social anxiety. But I do, for sure, have ADHD and that’s some kind of brain difference. My friend also has ADHD. She only recently started treatment. So I want to attribute a lot of this to that. But it’s getting harder to just blame it all on executive function. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bring-may-glowers-monthly-mini-rants/1017737.md?page=11)