# Britain Needs Sperm!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [May 17, 2007, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481 "2007-05-17T17:44:23Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Mouse\_Maven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mouse_Maven)
#### Post date: [May 17, 2007, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/1 "2007-05-17T17:44:23Z")
One man’s quest to get juice from [Limeys.](http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/6661261.stm)
😃
---
### Author:  [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)
#### Post date: [May 17, 2007, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/2 "2007-05-17T17:51:48Z")
“Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.”
---
### Author:  [@Mouse\_Maven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mouse_Maven)
#### Post date: [May 17, 2007, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/3 "2007-05-17T17:57:57Z")
“Every sperm is wanted.
Every sperm is good.
Every sperm is needed
In your neighbourhood.”
---
### Author:  [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)
#### Post date: [May 17, 2007, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/4 "2007-05-17T18:03:41Z")
_But Rosie you’re all right – you wear my ring
When you hold me tight – Rosie that’s my thing
When you turn out the light – I’ve got to hand it to me
Looks like it’s me and you again tonight Rosie_
---
### Author:  [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)
#### Post date: [May 17, 2007, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/5 "2007-05-17T18:05:27Z")
> [@The Article](#):
>
> New laws removing anonymity from sperm donors have led to a **shortfall** in recent years - there are just 208 in the UK. But, for many, it’s **hard** to address the subject without **raising** a snigger - which is why comedian Danny Robins was asked to see if would-be donors might be persuaded.
(Bolding mine) Think the phrasing here was intentional? Because this would work so much better if the last bit read “wood-be”.
---
### Author:  [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)
#### Post date: [May 17, 2007, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/6 "2007-05-17T18:06:58Z")
Hmm…did “close your eyes and think of England” ever come more apropos?
---
### Author:  [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)
#### Post date: [May 17, 2007, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/7 "2007-05-17T18:12:57Z")
I’ve given blood before. No way they’re goin’ _down there_ with a tourniquet and needle.
---
### Author:  [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)
#### Post date: [May 17, 2007, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/8 "2007-05-17T18:23:13Z")
[QUOTE=lieu]
I’ve given blood before. No way they’re goin’ _down there_ with a tourniquet and needle.
[/QUOTE]
Pussy.
---
### Author:  [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)
#### Post date: [May 17, 2007, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/9 "2007-05-17T18:26:53Z")
_looks at man’s costume in the first picture_ Wow. Er.
I’d say he certainly has the stones to wear that outfit out in public, except he doesn’t appear to…
---
### Author:  [@si\_blakely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/si_blakely)
#### Post date: [May 17, 2007, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/10 "2007-05-17T18:40:02Z")
How good is their … ahem … assisting material … ahem.
Inquiring minds want to know.
I’d help out, but there is a surgical disconnect between source and squirt, if you know what I mean. I should have laid some aside - I would not need it now.
But the loss of long-term anonymity has created a real problem here.
Si
---
### Author:  [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2007, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/11 "2007-05-18T02:05:11Z")
> [@](#):
>
> it’s hard to address the subject without raising a snigger -…
Can someone tell me what a ‘snigger’ is? Cos’ around these parts if I said that to the wrong person I might get my lights punched out.
---
### Author:  [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2007, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/12 "2007-05-18T02:13:21Z")
[QUOTE=SHAKES]
Can someone tell me what a ‘snigger’ is? Cos’ around these parts if I said that to the wrong person I might get my lights punched out.
[/QUOTE]
It’s an alteration of the word “snicker.” No idea what prompted the alteration, but from what I’ve been able to gather its etymology is no more interesting than that and seems not to have any racial motives.
---
### Author:  [@Celyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Celyn)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2007, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/13 "2007-05-18T03:21:32Z")
[QUOTE=SHAKES]
Can someone tell me what a ‘snigger’ is? Cos’ around these parts if I said that to the wrong person I might get my lights punched out.
[/QUOTE]
What **Mindifield** said. I suppose it must just be a U.K. word, but it has no connection with that racist word. Of course, you might still get your lights punched out by the kind of idiot who would get upset at the word “niggardly”. So, for safety’s sake, just don’t talk to idiots. 🙂
---
### Author:  [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2007, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/14 "2007-05-18T03:24:36Z")
So, if Britain needs sperm and Mars needs women, there would appear to be an obvious basis of trade.
---
### Author:  [@Jurph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurph)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2007, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/15 "2007-05-18T12:00:57Z")
You lot shouldn’t have a man advertising this campaign when you’ve got [Keeley Hazell](http://fartingbag.com/images/2006/keeley_bg.jpg) (SFW but racy) living right there. That’s like asking Bozo the Clown to get you through WWII while Winston Churchill reads the evening news!
---
### Author:  [@si\_blakely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/si_blakely)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2007, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/16 "2007-05-18T12:21:08Z")
[QUOTE=Jurph]
You lot shouldn’t have a man advertising this campaign when you’ve got [Keeley Hazell](http://fartingbag.com/images/2006/keeley_bg.jpg) (SFW but racy) living right there. That’s like asking Bozo the Clown to get you through WWII while Winston Churchill reads the evening news!
[/QUOTE]
Most workplaces I’ve been in here in the UK will have a few copies of _The Sun_ laying about, so the opportunity to observe Keeley’s “assets” in all their glory are common. If _The Sun_ is ok for the office, there isn’t too much that is NSFW. Odd thing is, most places will filter The Sun’s Page 3 website, but old newspapers containing the same material will stack up forever in the corner.
:smack:
Si
---
### Author:  [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2007, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/17 "2007-05-18T12:30:10Z")
[QUOTE=Celyn]
What **Mindifield** said. I suppose it must just be a U.K. word, but it has no connection with that racist word. Of course, you might still get your lights punched out by the kind of idiot who would get upset at the word “niggardly”. So, for safety’s sake, just don’t talk to idiots. 🙂
[/QUOTE]
We believe, of course, that “snigger” is the root and “snicker” the variation.
Censorware on another messageboard once changed the word to “s(Ban Me!)”. 😃
---
### Author:  [@pretend\_my\_name\_is\_witty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pretend_my_name_is_witty)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2007, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/18 "2007-05-18T12:52:41Z")
Now see; I’m up for donating but the new “_childrens’ right to know_” laws taking away donor anonymity are where I lose my will to donate.
The government has equated the children born via donated gametes to children that have been adopted and have a right to know where they come from. If I were to donate my sprerm to help a couple otherwise incapable of conceiving, I’d be happy to know I was helping them be happy and have nothing more to do with the process whatsoever. Law needs changing back, IM(and most other people’s)O.
---
### Author:  [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2007, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/19 "2007-05-18T13:18:55Z")
For a more serious question, how is it that they could have voted that in to begin with? How did a “child’s right to know” trump a donor’s right to privacy? I can understand if you knocked a girl up and then took off. There is at the very least a certain amount of emotional investment in the baby-making procedure for at least one of the two people involved, not to mention that the act of making that baby was deliberate and consensual and that there are responsibilities involved with the outcome. But sperm donation does not have any of that. Just because you donated the sperm doesn’t mean that the eventual product of that donation makes you its father in any meaningful way. You provided the genetic material and absolutely nothing more. You have no more right to call that child your son or daughter than it does to call you its father. So why did the government suddenly decide that this really is not the case after all?
---
### Author:  [@si\_blakely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/si_blakely)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2007, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481/20 "2007-05-18T13:36:35Z")
[QUOTE=Mindfield]
For a more serious question, how is it that they could have voted that in to begin with? How did a “child’s right to know” trump a donor’s right to privacy?
…
So why did the government suddenly decide that this really is not the case after all?
[/QUOTE]
It has been a gradual process, that started with adoption rights. If a child who was adopted has a right to discover their birth parents and siblings, then, by extension, so does a child born via sperm donation.
There are a few genetic issues that do crop up as well - if the donor developed (in later life) a genetic disease that could be treated early in their offspring, then the children probably have a right to know about that.
And I do think that within most people is a drive to know where they came from - and if you know that one of your parents wasn’t a biological parent (no matter the emotional situation) maybe that drive is so strong that you HAVE to know - I think for many adopted/donor children, that is the case.
Of course, it could be solve by a simple entry on the Birth Certificate:
_Father: Altruistic Tosser_😉
Si
[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britain-needs-sperm/404481.md?page=2)