[Makes mental note to pack a lunch if he ever visits England]
That sounds somewhat kinky.
Oh oh oh…
Seek out a supermarket or health food shop that sells Green and Black’s Organic Dark Chocolate
How about parkin, a sort of ginger cake, and gingerbread from Grasmere, in the lake district. It’s flat “cards” of it, and it tastes and smells fantastic. Worth a trip there just for that!
And one sort of tradition that we have in the north east is that on the sunday before palm sunday some people eat carlins (otherwise knoown as pigeon peas) with their sunday dinner. They look like dried rabbit droppings, but they taste a bit like mushy peas. Some pubs serve them fried with vinegar.
Fish and chips by the dock in the Orkney Islands.
Well, I must admit that the very worst Cornish Pastie I ever ate was from a little bakery in Cornwall. God, I was sooooo disappointed.
But another vote for a hearty English brekkie here!
I’ll raise your Ulster Fry, and add
a kipper (smoked herring)
two devilled kidneys,
and a side of fried mushrooms
for a real (Full Monty) English Breakfast.
Cheers, Bippy 
Just to cut in to this dance.
Pork pies. I know some of you know these already but trust me.
Until you have tasted a Melton Mowbray Pork, Cheese and Pickle pie. Well, you haven’t lived IMHO.
Allied to that.
Cornish pasties.
Ploughman’s lunch.
And.
The all time favourite.
As has been mentioned above.
Fish and Chips! Or beer, one or the other is the British best and most popular consumable.
Regards,
Arleth.
Being English and having lived here for 25 of my 33 years I’d recommend eating at;
a) An Indian restaurant
b) A Chinese restaurant
c) An Italian restaurant
d) A Greek restaurant
e) A Thai restaurant
Avoid the following types of restaurant
a) A pub
b) An english cafe
c) McDonalds / Burger King / Pizza Hut / KFC etc. etc. etc.
d) Fish and Chip shop
e) A bakery
If you see a sign with the word “Deli” on it, it isn’t. It’s a fridge with last weeks sandwiches wrapped in plastic.
If your chosen restaurant includes any of the following words, leave immediately and seek out nearest approved restaurant from the list at the top.
a) Pork Pie / Sausage / Pastie / Pie (general term) - Contrary to resonable belief, none of these have ever been proven to contain meat. The do however contain traces of mad cow disease.
b) Full English Breakfast - A heart attack on a plate
c) Marmite - No explaination needed. If visiting Australia, same applies to Vegemite
d) Roast Chicken/Beef/Lamb or other meat. The meat will be overcooked and the vegetables boiled for approx 3 hrs so as to remove all traces of flavor
e) Coffee - The only exception to this being Starbucks. A well know chain the south of England is Costa Coffee. Including the word “coffee” in their name must be some violation of advertising standards.
f) Sandwich - 2 slices of wafer thin white bread (less than 1% chance of wholemeal bread), covered in approx 1/2lb of butter. Fillings will be either Cheese or Ham. If the description includes Branston Pickle run very, very quickly. Do not expect salad. In the UK salad is 1 (and only 1) soggy piece of Iceberg lettuce.
g) Fish and Chips - Batter only. The contents dissolved whilst waiting 3hrs for the peas to be boiled
e) Salad Cream. This is not, repeat not, the same as mayonaise
If you are coming from the US and enjoy Mexican or Japanese cuisine, please do not be tempted to try these in the UK. Our hospitals are already over-crowded thank you.
Enjoy your trip 
Ahhh yes, moist crumpet. Just the ticket !
He he he he he
you’re such a card!
I know. Fancy a savoley, you yoooooung vixen ?
I’ll add a ringing endorsement of fish and chips, with the following caveats:
-
Quality varies widely, and it’s a good idea to run with a personal recommendation if at all possible. Otherwise, be prepared to shop around a bit. There are one or two national franchises, and they’re not bad.
-
The only way to eat fish and chips is out of paper. They use greaseproof these days, not newspaper. It’s not the same off a plate.
-
Eat it piping hot. What you’re hoping for is that they have just fried a batch of chips when your fish is ready. A place that has a big turnover will be keeping a production line going, obviously. It’s better to have to queue for a while and get your food freshly cooked than to get served straight away with something that’s been kept hot for an hour (although a little standing time in a warming cabinet is no bad thing, it lets some of the grease drip off).
-
The usual accompaniments are salt and vinegar. Don’t add vinegar until you’re ready to eat (which ideally will be the moment you get out of the shop) as it makes the chips, in particular, rather limp.
As has been pointed out, Brit chips are thicker cut than the “French fries” you’re used to. They’re also more recognisably potato-derived than certain franchise fare we’re both familiar with.
Re avoiding pubs for food:
Pubs are one of the great eating experienced in the world (well some of them) when they’re on form they produce great food. Look for the phrase ‘gastropub’.
One local to me, (White Horse; parsons Green aka the Sloaney Pony) actually have a beer list to match the food.
I’ll put in another vote for toad-in-the-hole and add one for meringues. I’ve also eaten very well in pubs, including one near Salisbury about half way up the hill to old Sarum where I had wonderful Lincolnshire sausage! Actually, sausage seems to be good most places. Also, English candies seem to be better than American ones, especially the chocolate.
CJ
Jaffa Cakes!!! Delicious - whenever I haul my butt back to Australia I will be taking a crate of these. Preferably consume them while watching a football (soccer) game.
Spotted dick is fab, despite my initial apprehension, and I love, love, love the sausages here. Actual meat in them, unlike the ones I am used to. Bangers and mash is a must.
Bacon sandwich smothered in HP sauce. Clotted cream ice cream, cheeses, fresh Cornish or Orkney crab, smoked salmon, toasted tea cakes with loads of butter…yum, want one now.
And do have a full breakfast, preferable with black and/or white pudding - it tastes great, especially mixed with scrambled egg and bacon on the fork.
Jam Roly Poly with Lashings of custard mmmmmmmm…
The best sausages I have had are Irish and not availible here.
If you are a visitor to the UK I recommend trying local cheeses, shop around.
If you’re here (or there) for the holidays, try Christmas Cake and Puddings. Oh, and meringue. Yummm…
Except don’t have it at my Mother in Law’s, who puts so much alcohol in the thing, I get merry eating one piece of it. I especially like the crunchy white icing with the little figurines on top.
I’m still trying to figure out curry chips.
When I first came to London that was still - okay, only just - a pub …before the fuckwits moved in. Does the Bricklayers Arms off the Lower Richmond Road ring any bells, up the side road opposite the Star and Garter ? … used to arrange the occasional secret assignation there …sigh … as, of course, Cromwell used to do in the Church by Putney Bridge. We had different goals, though …
Hey, I have two - count 'em two - dedicated sausage shops in my local High Street … remarkable, really, as there are also Tesco, Sainsbury and Waitrose supermarkets.
How about … ‘Steak and Ale Pie’ on a wintery Sunday; steamy, crusty pastery …
Years ago, I read about a London pub called “Dirty Dick’s”…the place’s claim to fame was that it hadn’t been cleaned in 300 years! I wonder how the food there is…any UK dopers care to comment?
For your info, NYC has a similar place (McSorley’s Ale House, near the CooperUnion Institute). The place is absolutelyfilthy! (there are chicken wishbones parked on the light fixtures-some reputedly there since the 1920’s)!